Sex, Drunk and Awkward: Too much information - FML

Too much information

By Anonymous - 28/06/2022 10:00 - United States - Peyton

Spicy

Today, my wife of twelve years got drunk and told me the best sex she’s ever had was with her first ex after they broke up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 987

You deserved it 186

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Same thing different taste

I was the bullet in the relationship

By Anonymous - 10/01/2023 10:00

Today, for the first time in two years, I met my ex-girlfriend. I was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 480

You deserved it 362

By Anonymous - 13/11/2010 05:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, the girl that I have been trying to get with for over a year told me she was drunk and just gave her first blowjob to some guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 623

You deserved it 4 799

Thank God

By Dwarvahkiin - 08/08/2022 02:00

Spicy

Today, just as we got done having probably the best sex of our relationship, my partner called me her ex's name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 196

You deserved it 167

By an unlucky man - 05/08/2016 09:37 - United States - Simi Valley

Today, my current wife left me for my ex-wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 013

You deserved it 3 107

By Anonymous - 15/02/2010 01:49 - United States

Spicy

Today, my wife came home drunk, telling me all about this amazing man she met at the club with her friends, and how she wanted to have sex with him but couldn't because she was on her period. What a present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 619

You deserved it 2 554

Last trip

By cap - 09/12/2019 01:00 - United States - Manhattan

Today, I had sex with my wife only to be told that the sex was horrible and to be given divorce papers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 248

You deserved it 321

By Anonymous - 09/12/2012 14:53 - United States - Conroe

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years drunkenly introduced me to another very special lady. His wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 352

You deserved it 3 771

Daddy issues

By Anonymous - 19/01/2022 07:59 - Colombia

Spicy

Today, I met my wife’s father, an alcoholic who'd abandoned her, for the first time. She now has to support him financially. The guy is a piece of shit, but after we left, she fucked me more vigorously than I thought possible. I’m planning to see this turd again, just for the benefit of my sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 427

You deserved it 1 524

By dantko - 01/01/2014 05:04 - United States - Dearborn

Today, my wife got so drunk she kissed another guy when the ball dropped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 111

You deserved it 5 317

What about me?

By crushed - 23/05/2020 02:00

Today, my wife told me about an old boyfriend she had. She told me that they used to fool around, and that she’d give him blow jobs all the time. I never get any action like that from her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 780

You deserved it 262

Next

Top comments

Chazzster 28

Tuesday 28 June 2022 18:25

Ouch! That’s gotta hurt. It would help if you talked out exactly what your wife wants and expects during sex and also what you enjoy most. That needs to be done when both of you are feeling comfortable enough to discuss this honestly. I believe that anyone can improve their sex life if the partners are able and willing to communicate honestly and without verbally attacking either.

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 28 June 2022 19:01

I hope you mean EX-wife!

Comments

Chazzster 28

Tuesday 28 June 2022 18:25

Ouch! That’s gotta hurt. It would help if you talked out exactly what your wife wants and expects during sex and also what you enjoy most. That needs to be done when both of you are feeling comfortable enough to discuss this honestly. I believe that anyone can improve their sex life if the partners are able and willing to communicate honestly and without verbally attacking either.

Earl_KarmasBitch 34

Tuesday 28 June 2022 18:59

Tell her you want a divorce and then jump into bed with her. You can choose whether to change your mind or not afterwards.

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 28 June 2022 19:01

I hope you mean EX-wife!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, while I was making out with my boyfriend, he left my dorm suddenly without telling me where he was going. A few hours later, he texted me to tell me that being with me made him feel dirty and he had gone to confession. He then called me a sinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83 551

You deserved it 7 856

Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex. I was on top and really into it but in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said, "Huh, look at the time, I gotta get home." She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 747

You deserved it 17 915

The Top

Today, my son spilled his milk at the table. My wife got in his face and screamed that he took her body, her career, her friends, and her life from her, then stormed out of the house. He won't stop wailing and crying, she won't answer her phone, and I'm completely shattered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 958

You deserved it 227

Today, I saw a little girl digging in the gravel inside the fireworks tent I work in. After she and her family left, I went and used my foot to smooth out the mound she'd made. In doing so, I discovered that she wasn't digging, she was burying. She'd pooped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 232

You deserved it 4 792

Today, my boyfriend moved in with me. I just walked into my kitchen to find my thirty year-old, perfectly seasoned cast iron skillet completely submerged in soapy water in the sink, presumably from last night when he washed the dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 726

You deserved it 4 192

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 980

You deserved it 7 445

Today, I recorded a 20-minute TED talk and told my students to watch it on the app in preparation for next terms projects. I got bombarded with messages from my students, telling me that because I was sat down on a chair while recording, certain camera angles could see straight up my skirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 911

You deserved it 671

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me to a movie after days of not seeing me. This long-awaited date involved me paying for food and my movie ticket when he ran out of cash again. He then dumped me as we left the theater walking to his car. Yes, I financed my own breakup date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 850

You deserved it 4 875