Health, Poopoo peepee, Weird and Farts: Trumpet solo

Trumpet solo

By Churizmo - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was at a party and I really had to use the bathroom. There were 30-40 people talking outside the door, so I thought it would be ok to make some noise. Just as I'm about to begin having explosive diarrhea, everyone fell silent as my dad began to pray for our meal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 251

You deserved it 5 553

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Same thing different taste

You OK in there?

By stinkypants - 10/11/2011 03:15 - India

Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 788

You deserved it 11 866

By MisterBrown - 15/02/2010 07:08 - United States

Today, while at a family get together, my bowels suddenly decided they needed to be emptied. Straight away. I felt bad enough using someone else's bathroom for this, but later, my sister came in and loudly said "God, Brian, what the hell have you been eating?" in front of everyone at the get together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 773

You deserved it 3 361

Amen

By Anonymous - 22/06/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, apparently my bathroom breaks have perfect comedic timing. My very religious parents were praying in the living room. I quietly snuck into the bathroom that's less than ten yards from where they're at. Right as they finished praying and saying "Amen" I let off a massive fart, and my dad burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 109

Check her out

By minnie - 28/08/2009 18:30 - United States

Today, I was feeling sick and I farted really loud in the school's girls bathroom. Some boys overheard from the hall and called everyone over. I came out only to find about 20 guys staring anxiously at the bathroom's door to see who I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 806

You deserved it 6 906

Bathroom break

By Anonymous - 21/12/2010 02:31 - United States

Today, I had to go to the bathroom. I was in a rush, so I went into the boys bathroom. I then had diarrhea. The entire basketball team was waiting for me outside the stall. They did a slow clap for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 371

You deserved it 8 257

Symphony

By Anonymous - 06/05/2009 19:17 - United States

Today, I had some pretty bad stomach pain, so I went to the bathroom. After a few minutes, two girls walked in, taking stalls next to me. That's when my farts began to get very large and explosive. Not only did they break into laughter, they waited for me to come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 492

You deserved it 5 203

By EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 299

You deserved it 7 528

Leaked

By Morgan Bailey - 18/09/2018 14:00

Today, I tried to let out a small fart in a crowded restaurant. I had diarrhea. I walked past several families to get to the bathroom and clean myself up, only to still go home with a huge wet spot down my ass. My shirt wasn't long enough to hide it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 746

You deserved it 893

By GoDiarrhea - 04/03/2010 18:52 - Argentina

Today, I came down with sudden diarrhea while at taekwondo practice. I discreetly called my dad for a pickup, but on our way out, he told my instructor that I had to go because I was "shitting my pants with fear". He did this in front of all my classmates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 466

You deserved it 2 854

By ugh - 03/09/2013 23:53 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 765

You deserved it 40 919

marz88 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 23:34

Family Game of battle ***** GO GO!

geesquared 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 23:33

that is really embarassing. XD

Comments

greggo 0

Monday 20 July 2009 0:08

FYL for your familiy praying and actually thinking that there really is a god.

seb12992 0

Monday 20 July 2009 0:32

FYL to anyone who's close minded enough to actually believe the big bang created the universe, including the jackass above me.

marz88 0

Monday 20 July 2009 0:40

Don't turn this into a religion debate no one cares. KTHNXBYE

Phillay632 0

Monday 20 July 2009 0:53

That is incredibly disrespectful. You should be ashamed of yourself. Everyone is entitled to their own values, opinions, and beliefs. As a Christian, should I knock you for being an atheistic heathen or would you prefer that I accept and respect our differences? Gosh, it must be lonely up there on your pedestal...

GFLiE 0

Monday 20 July 2009 2:56

HOW ON EARTH DID I KNOW SOME ****** WAS GOING TO SAY THAT?

littlemuffet 0

Monday 20 July 2009 3:09

Have you not seen your profile picture?

uSound 0

Monday 20 July 2009 5:24

54. rofl.

seb12992 0

Monday 20 July 2009 17:28

@ marz88 I have a better idea, stop using "KTHNXBYE". Only annoying scenecore ***** use that stupid word.

chloe2114 4

Monday 25 April 2011 0:39

#93, erm, u just used it... KTHNXBYE xoxo

farhil 14

Monday 20 July 2009 0:11

haha wow

party_it_up 0

Monday 20 July 2009 0:18

Wow that blows :/ Haha, hopefully no one noticed? lol FYL

onlycusimbored 0

Monday 20 July 2009 0:34

YDI for thinking it would be ok to be loud.

efmivida 0

Monday 20 July 2009 0:45

way to try to go against the grain with a comment that makes no sense

onlycusimbored 0

Monday 20 July 2009 0:47

Dunno what grade you're in, but it makes perfect sense.

doggylover27 0

Monday 20 July 2009 0:47

Yikes. ~gotta say yikes~ I wanna say the cat is out of the bag sounds like the crap is out of the ass tho.

littlerock_fml 0

Monday 20 July 2009 2:43

That was like, almost funny, but not.

Shell02 0

Monday 27 September 2010 6:49

it wasnt almost funny, it was terrible.

macc55 2

Monday 20 July 2009 0:57

you should of stormed out of the bathroom saying "wow! you couldn't wait for me?"

SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0

Monday 20 July 2009 1:12

LMAO! This is awesome. That's happened to me a couple times, and damn is it embarrassing.

carmen456 0

Monday 20 July 2009 1:28

lmfao samme...... haha

meanie_monday 0

Monday 20 July 2009 1:32

lmao I hate those moments they're very awkward. I remember once I had explosive diarrhea in the middle of the night and didn't expect anyone to be awake until I hear my dad cough and turn the tv up louder. XD