Sex, Food and Intimacy: Unexpected arousal

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Unexpected arousal

By Anonymous - 20/08/2013 22:46 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, I got sexual tingles while watching a Subway worker assemble my sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 849

You deserved it 12 336

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Same thing different taste

Flustration

By Anonymous - 19/03/2023 18:00

Today, I got flustered by the gorgeous sandwich artist at Subway and ordered a “meat-long foot-ball.” On Rye of course. FML

I agree, your life sucks 634

You deserved it 260

By Shoofly - 04/03/2011 22:54 - United States

Today, while at Subway, I looked on as an employee killed a fly with his hands. He then continued working without a second thought. He was making my sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 961

You deserved it 4 257

Turned on

By Anonymous - 31/03/2012 15:10 - United States

Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 557

You deserved it 11 138

By /(•'_'•)\ - 07/09/2013 16:59 - United States - Ballwin

Today, while working at Subway, I was about to take a guy's order. He quickly held up a hand and asked for someone else to make his sub, because he doesn't like "ugly people" touching his food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 910

You deserved it 3 845

By Anonymous - 31/08/2019 06:03 - United States - New York

Today, while working at Subway, I was called a "terrorist" and other names by a customer 'behind my back'. I made him the best sandwich I'd ever made, in order to leave a good impression. Then I had to say the wonderful words, "Your total is $9.11." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 216

You deserved it 155

By Anonycock - 06/01/2016 17:15 - Qatar - Doha

Today, I'm so sexually deprived, I got a boner from undressing a mannequin at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 844

You deserved it 3 913

"I'm horny, horny horny horny"

By Anonymous - 29/09/2020 23:01

Today, I got incredibly horny at work. No one was in the office, so I spread out on my yoga mat and started to masturbate. All of the sudden, I heard a forklift outside. I quickly tried to hide, but I think the construction worker caught me. He’ll be working here all month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 382

You deserved it 3 141

Dirty mind

By Anonymous - 11/12/2015 20:24 - United States - Porter

Today, I'm so sexually deprived that I got a raging hard-on from seeing and hearing my coworker yawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 627

You deserved it 4 707

Get back here!

By matte - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, whilst working at Subway, I took an order for 6 footlongs. The entire process took 15 minutes due to the customer's hesitant and glacial pace. When it came to paying, he pulled out his wallet, looked inside, looked at me, and walked quickly out of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94 018

You deserved it 4 986

Forever alone

By FriutlessApple - 11/10/2013 15:18 - United Kingdom

Today, feeling bored and lonely, I drove into town to wander around the shops and go to Subway for lunch. While there, I picked up two trays and put one on the opposite side of the table, along with some of my rubbish, to make it look like I was with someone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 566

You deserved it 11 123

JoeGrant 12

Wednesday 21 August 2013 9:37

Hey, the way they lay that meat on there, sexy as anything else.

frozenfreeze 5

Wednesday 21 August 2013 9:39

There's a reason it's called the $5 footlong.

Comments

LogicWizard 3

Wednesday 21 August 2013 10:49

Make that sandwich you naughty, naughty girl

Leaynax 13

Wednesday 21 August 2013 10:55

This disturbs me because I work at Subway...

onedayinamsterda 14

Wednesday 21 August 2013 12:33

it'd make sense if you were the one serving OP

hermitknut 22

Wednesday 21 August 2013 11:24

"But when she's buttering my baguette My blood runs hot and cold" I'm going to have Ian Drury's 'Geraldine' in my head all day now...

unhappyhug 11

Wednesday 21 August 2013 11:51

Understandable, subway is ******* amazing.

Kolzard 3

Wednesday 21 August 2013 11:59

I'm scared as I live just behind a Subway in Sheffield... *please tell me it wasn't Glossop Road...*

sarahjanek 7

Wednesday 21 August 2013 11:59

That's not normal? Oh

zuixdoll 9

Wednesday 21 August 2013 12:09

was it the roast beef

whoracle_fml 12

Wednesday 21 August 2013 12:28

It's must have been toasted, if it was that hot ._.

ohhey_di 10

Wednesday 21 August 2013 12:39

So it's not just me...

FrankHotpants 31

Wednesday 21 August 2013 12:40

Just be sure to practice a safe lunch and use condiments.

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