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By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went over to welcome this new couple to our subdivision with a bottle of wine and muffins. I told them I liked what they were doing with the place, then asked them when they had moved in. They replied, "Two years ago." FML
I agree, your life sucks 8 535
You deserved it 38 363
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Top comments

Selena_is_back 7

I don't get it. Then again, I have the IQ of a glass of water, wee-woo!

64 6

Comments

hollee 0

I'd still be excited to get the wine if I were them :)

4 1
Marvin_Android 0

Sounds embarrassing. This illustrates the futility of trying to have social graces and form relationships with your fellow lifeforms. Even with the noblest of intentions, all your efforts can (and usually do) end up for naught. Worse yet, as in your case, it completely backfires. You'd have been better off having not even tried. Such is the case with much of life. Life. Don't talk to me about life.

13 2
persianjr1 7

WHAT ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT!! ISNT IT OBVIUOS!! the neighbors are supa secret ninjas!!!

5 5
DncrHap 9

your social ineptitude makes me smile. (:

17 1
xTrue25 0

your cleavage makes me smile :)

2 2
Selena_is_back 7

I don't get it. Then again, I have the IQ of a glass of water, wee-woo!

64 6
Doortje 29

Of course you did, it has your name under it. [/rolleyes]

20 3
Doortje 29

Why thanks KaySL, your argument was rather compelling too.

5 1
Selena_is_back 7

Clearly you guys don't understand what I said. All I posted was: "I don't get it." and then it was moderated by adding "I have an IQ of a glass of water and wee-woo." UNDERSTAND?

13 20
SympathyearAbs 0

Selena, read this comment before it's buried, they're all assholes. 95% of the people on this site are pure bastards, don't take it personally. I'm sorry you're being bullied so badly for this, whether whatever happened, they don't need to be such dicks.

8 25
DocBastard 38

We're all bastards. Why do you think they assigned this username to me? I don't WANT to act this way, but that's the role that was given to me, so I have to play along. Selena, you're stupid and you should give up now. See! I didn't want to say that! Honest!

35 3
iliketurdles 7

Does that mean my role is to rape poor unsuspecting turtles? I don't really want to either but if it must be done, it has to be done.

22 2
DocBastard 38

What, you think FMLers pick their own usernames? Anyone who believes that needs to have his head examined. *puts on tin foil hat*

18 2
Trollz4daLULZ 1

I take great pride in contributing to #30's opinion of people on this site.

4 1
maz255 10

I wonder what my name means....? hmmmm

0 5
mk58 31

Hahaha, this thread is hilarious. I would favourite this comment if I could.

0 5
LMAOking123 15

I'm supposed 2 govern lmao… I think ALL OF U MUST ASK MY PERMISSION B4 U CAN LMAO MWAHAHAHAH XD

0 0
Doortje 29

You're beyond stupid. Try to get out more.

2 9
My_Deathbed 0

*note* they said two years ago it doesn't mean they were telling the truth. they just wanted to **** with them...

2 4
aliceharper 0

ydi for being a good but unobservant neighbor haha

4 2
skyttlz 32

my neighbor went on a mission trip to the other side of the world and I didn't notice that she was gone for 8 months

5 1
mk58 31

Do you really have to talk like that? It makes me want to smack a bitch.

3 0
amerwin 3

Regardless, you extended your reach in friendship. If they were unappreciative, then that sucks. It's not your job to keep track of your neighbors.

7 0
Ninjafriends 1

Did you take back your wine and muffins? You've already made quite a fool of yourself, so appearing to be rude won't really do much more damage to your reputation. You might as well get drunk... and eat muffins?

9 0