"Who wants a dessert?" By Lewis - 27/12/2018 00:30 - France - Paris I made a huge mistake... I agree, your life sucks 291 You deserved it 88 Share Tweet Share
Today, I got dressed, did my hair, carefully applied my makeup, sprayed myself with perfume, grabbed my bag and put on my coat. I got to the door, and then realised that I had nowhere to go, nothing to do and none of my friends were answering my calls. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 486 You deserved it 537
Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML I agree, your life sucks 41 668 You deserved it 3 982
Today, I invited my girlfriend to come over, telling her I had a surprise. I filled the bathtub and lit a lot of candles to be romantic. She gets here, and we start doing our thing. Until we smell something burning. It was my hair. I now have a bald spot on the back of my head. FML I agree, your life sucks 16 820 You deserved it 29 363
Today, I was on a date with someone I've had a crush on for a long time. It was after midnight, we were chatting in the car and I was close to having my first kiss ever. That is, until a bunch of policemen popped up to arrest my date for being a suspected drug dealer. FML I agree, your life sucks 35 385 You deserved it 3 595
Today, safety inspectors have deemed our basement unfit to serve as a bedroom due to a fire hazard. Our bed is now in the living room. FML I agree, your life sucks 9 124 You deserved it 994
Today, I got into a pretty heated argument with my boss. On my way out the door I told him he would be lucky if I came back to work. Unfortunately, I left the interior light on in my truck and it drained the battery. I had to go back in and ask for a jump. FML I agree, your life sucks 12 805 You deserved it 36 206
Today, I wanted to go shopping in my new car that I bought just a month ago. When I stepped outside, I saw someone had smashed the driver side's window. They didn't even steal anything. FML I agree, your life sucks 965 You deserved it 72
Today, I realized I look better with a Hitler moustache than any other facial hairstyle. FML I agree, your life sucks 517 You deserved it 190
you dessert it! :)
Soooo cute