By Noname - 06/03/2009 22:20 - United States Today, I was at the dentist getting a cavity filled. As she's drilling into my tooth, I feel the drill slip, and then she quickly stuffs gauze into my mouth. She nervously laughs and says to me "Wow! You must really be numb!" FML I agree, your life sucks 170 436 You deserved it 7 526 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." FML I agree, your life sucks 47 064 You deserved it 5 144
Today, my brother showed my wife a Craigslist ad by someone seeking casual sex. It had very specific details that made it seem like I wrote it. My brother later admitted in private that he made the post as revenge for me not loaning him $500 last month. Meanwhile, my wife still thinks I'm unfaithful. FML I agree, your life sucks 18 644 You deserved it 1 158
Today, to save money on our vacation, we got a single room with double beds. What a mistake that was. Thanks to our dad's OCD need to stick to his schedule, he got us up at 6 every morning, we had to be in bed by 9:30PM and absolutely no relaxing by the pool, because “we got things to do.” FML I agree, your life sucks 448 You deserved it 135
Today, we drove six hours to get to our holiday cottage only to realise that my girlfriend had forgotten her suitcase. This put her in a bad mood, so she made ME drive six hours back to her flat to get it, then when I got there, I realised HER keys to HER FLAT were still in HER handbag six hours back at the cottage. FML I agree, your life sucks 592 You deserved it 307
Today, me, my boyfriend and his family stayed at an AirBnB while on a trip. While I was doing my makeup, my boyfriend told me he was going to take a shower. A few minutes later, I went in the bathroom to shave my legs thinking my boyfriend was in there, but his dad was in the shower, scrubbing his ass. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 639 You deserved it 611
Today, on vacation, I had my first encounter with a macaw parrot, who promptly bit my ear and shat on me while amused tourists laughed and took pictures. FML I agree, your life sucks 4 248 You deserved it 413
Today, my girlfriend confessed that she'd leave me for her ex in a heartbeat. Tomorrow is, or should I say "was", our wedding day. FML I agree, your life sucks 39 022 You deserved it 2 405
Today, I confronted my husband about yet again going out “with the boys” and not coming home. I told him that as long as he has that ring on his finger, he’s gonna respect me, the kids, and our home. He responded by taking off his wedding band and throwing it to the ground. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 024 You deserved it 538