Dentist

No pain, no gain

By Anonymous - 29/03/2023 04:00 - Canada

Today, I went to the dentist to get a cavity filled. The numbing medication didn't work, so I felt everything. I was in so much pain that I accidentally bit down on the dentist's finger, causing him to yell in agony. Now, I have to find a new dentist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 771

You deserved it 160

8 out of 10 dentists

By Anonymous - 21/03/2023 14:00

Today, I went to the dentist for a routine cleaning, only to find out that I had been brushing my teeth wrong for years. He told me you're supposed to let the toothpaste do its magic instead of rinsing it off. Is this true? FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 406

Take the L

By Anonymous - 11/03/2023 00:00

Today, I went to the dentist for a routine cleaning. As I was leaving, the receptionist told me to "have a nice day" and I replied, "You too, love you!" then I went back home and roasted in the embarrassment for an hour or two. FML

I agree, your life sucks 740

You deserved it 218

Venn diagram of healthy living

By Anonymous - 10/02/2023 00:00

Today, after a conversation with my dentist on how to prevent further suffering, I realized that what is good for my teeth, my health, and my digestion are actually three different things that don’t offer much overlap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 639

You deserved it 108

Sensitive

By Anonymous - 08/11/2022 10:00

Today, my teeth are very sensitive and hold a grudge, so since getting a cavity fixed a month ago, I’ve had a good side and a bad side to chew on (or rather: not chew on). Unfortunately, I had to see the dentist again for another cavity, and now what used to be my bad side is now my good side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 708

You deserved it 119

Bruxism

By tiptoppc - 04/11/2022 00:00

Today, after waking up from a bad migraine which caused my teeth to clench, I found out that I broke a molar. A dentist told me it split down to the bone, so I need root canal and an extended crown. Then they told me the tooth below had also broke and has to be pulled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 928

You deserved it 83

Tooth hurty

By Anonymous - 28/10/2022 00:00 - Germany

Today, I asked my dentist for a sick note so I could get my lost filling put back in ASAP. According to her, being in pain 24/7 is not a medical condition that would justify immediate treatment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 865

You deserved it 102

Lil Tooth

By randomusername99 - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I got a new dentist. You know how most dentists play soft, relaxing music? Well this guy seems to like rap a lot, and it's kinda hard getting your teeth cleaned to the sound of bullets going off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 212

You deserved it 4 839

Splatter

By maninpain - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Kenya

Today, after a root canal, I went to the pharmacy for some pain killers. The cute girl behind the counter asked what I needed. When I opened my mouth to tell her, a wave of drool hurtled out and splattered on the counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 459

You deserved it 4 100

Not now, bowels!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I finally felt the effects of a laxative that I took last night. This morning, when I was in the dentist's chair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 132

You deserved it 7 122

US healthcare is ****** up

By Teethsuck - 18/08/2022 06:00 - United States - North Pole

Today, I went to the dentist two years after having a front tooth knocked out because I could finally (barely) afford the $4000 bill for an implant. They checked me out and told me that my teeth have shifted to the point that I’ll need braces before receiving an implant, for another $4k bill. I’m sick of looking like a hick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 968

You deserved it 125

Dental practice

By urbantrashcan - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my dentist and his hygienist were flirting while they worked on my mouth. I didn't really mind, however I definitely minded when the hygienist pierced my gum with her tool because she was laughing at one of his jokes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 564

You deserved it 1 517

Up to no good, sonny Jim ?

By Anonymous - 03/08/2022 10:00

Today, I went to the dentist in the same building my wife works. I decided to leave a love note on her car to surprise her. I'm currently being held by security, waiting on the cops, on suspicion of stalking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 042

You deserved it 156

Slippery

By Anonymous - 03/08/2022 04:00

Today, my husband is so desperate to not spend time with my parents that on my dad's birthday he claimed he forgot and booked a trip to the dentist, and now for their anniversary he's pulled the same trick again and booked this year's prostate exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 943

You deserved it 266

Dental records

By Stephanie Kugelman - 15/07/2022 10:00

Today, it's the sixth day in a row of non-stop migraines, due to grinding my teeth. Medicine works, but doesn't last. A mouth guard offers very little relief, I'm just so stressed out, and I think too much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 858

You deserved it 153

Not so white lie

By mintyfresh - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to lie to my dentist about how often I brush my teeth. I honestly don't remember the last time I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 344

You deserved it 121 351

Moist

By HonestlyVirgoHonesty - 01/05/2022 14:00

Today, I went to go soak my dentures because I fell asleep wearing them last night, only to find that my boyfriend threw away the container they were in, thinking it was trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 866

You deserved it 107

Gappy

By Anonymous - 07/04/2022 04:00

Today, after having to get the front filling on my tooth fixed five times, the dentist finally decided to give me a crown. While waiting for the permanent to be made, I had a temporary one put in. This one fell out five times. The final time, I actually sneezed it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 111

Quack detector

By gummy - 13/03/2022 20:00 - United States

Today, my date told me that he, his parents, and grandparents, believe that all doctors, but especially dentists, are nothing but drug-pushing crooks, and therefore completely unnecessary. Oh and the fact that they’ve all lost their teeth is “genetic” and has nothing to do with their hygiene. FML

I agree, your life sucks 856

You deserved it 84

Drilled

By Anonymous - 22/02/2022 13:00 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I was having drilling work done on my teeth. My dentist slipped and drilled a hole in my cheek. I said mistakes happen, but that I didn't expect to pay for the work. They still billed me for it and sent me a prescription that I had to go and get (and pay for) in case it got infected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 285

You deserved it 124

Healthcare for all, now!

By Anonymous - 25/01/2022 20:01

Today, the gums around my wisdom teeth are so badly swollen that I can't talk. I called a dentist to find out if I could see them for a removal. They told me to contact a surgeon, or go to the hospital emergency room. I have no insurance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 085

You deserved it 228

Power grid

By Anonymous - 27/11/2021 19:01 - United States - Seagraves

Today, I was at the dentist's and she was hands deep in my mouth with a drill, when the power for the whole block shuts off. For 3 hours, the dentist had to keep shooting me up with shots to numb the horrible pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 258

You deserved it 82

Everybody hurts

By NoNovocaine - 20/11/2021 10:59 - Canada - Barrie

Today, while getting a dental filling, the fire alarm sounded. The plaza was evacuated and we had to stand outside in the cold for 2 hours. The anesthetic wore off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 080

You deserved it 61

Worst teeth in the game

By Anonymous - 23/09/2021 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to the dentist and she told me, "If you don't stop smoking, yellow teeth aren't the only thing you'll have to worry about." I don't even smoke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 975

You deserved it 121

OCD FML

By Anonymous - 25/08/2021 06:01 - Germany

Today, my teeth feel dirty. Just go brush them, right? Actually, I just did. Thoroughly and meticulously, for several minutes, until both my arm and my gums hurt. Yep, still feel dirty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 682

You deserved it 231

Internet doctor

By ThatYourDoctor - 25/08/2021 00:01

Today, a patient came to the ER at 4 a.m., but left complaining I wasn't treating him properly. I treated his toothache with painkillers that would get him through the night so he could contact a dentist the next day. He showed me a TikTok video of the tooth surgery that he supposedly needed instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 009

You deserved it 67

Hangry dude

By Anonymous - 07/08/2021 20:01

Today, I accidentally bit so hard on my fork that I cracked my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 748

You deserved it 247

Is there anybody out there?

By Natalie - 11/06/2021 09:01 - United States

Today, I started my treatment for dental aligners. I talked to myself a bit to see how I sounded and it turns out that I have a small lisp. I wanted to share how I sounded with someone, then I realized I don't have anyone I can call. I have to wait 3 days until someone can hear my funny new lisp at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 827

You deserved it 138

Brain fog

By Anonymous - 01/05/2021 20:01

Today, I was at the dentist and got laughing gas to lessen the anxiety I get from the numbing shots. When I was good and "relaxed", an assistant leaned real close and said, "Open wide." I just stared back at her and widened my eyes. She had to clarify she was talking about my mouth. Duh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 863

You deserved it 267

Gummy

By madeleine - 08/04/2021 05:00

Today, I caught my young daughter eating candy after brushing her teeth. Angry, I asked her if she wanted all her teeth to fall out. She smiled and said, “Yes!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 674

You deserved it 292

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The Top

Today, I was at a guy's house that I’d been seeing for a while. After watching a movie, I confessed that after these past few times we’ve hung out, I’ve started to catch feelings. He looked at me and said, "I actually don’t think I want anything serious, but are you down to be friends with benefits?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 545

You deserved it 476

Today, I found out that when you gain too much weight, your penis can get significantly smaller. After noticing that things had been "off" in the bedroom, my girlfriend and I decided to measure it. There was significant shrinkage. I guess it's time to start working out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 971

You deserved it 1 921

The Top

Today, someone stole my card number and tried to use it. Every transaction got declined, not because the bank knew it was a fraudulent charge, but because I'm so poor that he couldn't make even a single purchase. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 574

You deserved it 3 901

Today, I pulled up to an intersection behind a car waiting to turn left and we missed a whole set of lights. As I was getting frustrated that they weren’t going when the light was green, I realised I was waiting behind a parked car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 249

You deserved it 1 061

Today, my dog left his very loud and obnoxious squeaky stuffed-toy in the paddock and my horse got a hold of it. My horse won't stop and I can't get it away from him. It's been 6 hours and the noise hasn't stopped yet. It also shows no signs of doing so any time soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 532

You deserved it 635

Today, I came home after a two week vacation to find that my wonderful dog had pooped and peed all over my room. My mother was kind enough to dog-sit; however, instead of helping me by cleaning up the horrid mess, she just left me coupons for Glade plug-in air fresheners. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 036

You deserved it 3 871

Today, I cut my finger at work while chopping some vegetables. I grabbed the nearest rag I could to stop the bleeding and put it on the cut. I didn't know the rag had just been used to clean up a lemon juice spill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 464

You deserved it 4 062

Today, my boyfriend, a math teacher, wanted to recite multiplication timetables while making love in order to come less quickly. He could only recite up to the number 5. The timestables turned him on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 290

You deserved it 175