Money

By Noname - 13/01/2009 10:06 - United States

Today, my portfolio manager called me and said he had invested all of my retirement in Circuit City. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 760

You deserved it 3 109

By Celina - 12/01/2009 09:55 - United States

Today, I have -$700 in my current account, $500 from overdraft fees because I spent money they told me I had. I don't get paid till the 15th and when I cash in my paycheck all of it will go to bringing me even. So the $9 I found in my wallet this morning will have to last me untill the 30th. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 786

You deserved it 5 375

By Perdedor - 07/01/2009 21:54 - United States

Today, my boss called me in to tell me I had got a raise. I bought a $1500 Chanel bag. Two hours later he called me in to tell me he was kidding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 910

You deserved it 45 003

Unlucky or just forgetful?

By failphone - 07/01/2009 19:57 - United States

Today, I lost my third phone in a year, making it a grand total of 11 telephones lost or stolen in the past 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 963

You deserved it 31 577

By Anonymous - 04/01/2009 05:24 - France

Today, I withdrew $120 from the ATM at the hotel I'm staying at, only to have no money come out. When I talked to the concierge, who witnessed the whole thing, she said it had been happening all day and that the machine was broken. My bank says it's the hotel's problem, and the hotel says it's the bank's problem. Either way, I'm out $120. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 759

You deserved it 2 053

By Anonymous - 31/12/2008 03:21 - France

Today, my first and only true date ended with the girl saying, "Thanks for dinner, I was hungry - and oh, by the way, I'm a lesbian." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 066

You deserved it 2 494

By Anonymous - 30/12/2008 20:30 - France

Today, when I saw a big box that looked like a playstation, I got really excited and my parents were there and everything looked like it really was something big, so I start to open the wrapper and surprise... it was a lamp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 948

You deserved it 7 007

By Colin - 24/12/2008 05:56 - France

Today, I phoned up my bank's customer service department. I waited eleven minutes on hold with the lovely music, and when a woman finally picked up, I ran out of phone credit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 372

You deserved it 3 037

Thanks guys

By daddy - 22/12/2008 05:43 - France

Today, someone stole both rear view mirrors from my scooter. And where were the police? They were 500 m down the road, waiting to stop me for not having any mirrors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 617

You deserved it 2 259

By fleur_de_fevrier - 21/12/2008 15:36 - Ireland

Today, I finally decided to go Christmas shopping. It's only once I arrived that I realized that I had forgotten my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 147

You deserved it 24 153

By dmlk - 10/12/2008 11:09 - France

Today, and for the third time this week, my bank manager called me to tell me that my account is still overdrawn. He doesn't seem to understand that my wages always get paid at the end of the month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 060

You deserved it 5 157

By Blue - 19/11/2008 11:02 - France

Today, I bought myself an MP3 player. Later, I was laying in bed, listening to music and eating a bowl of cereal, when I went to move the bowl of cereal on the bedside table for some shut eye. I dropped my MP3 player into the leftover milk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 366

You deserved it 29 863

By choup - 07/11/2008 21:02 - Australia

Today, I went to have a drink with my friend. On the way I withdrew 20 bucks and when I arrived at the bar I realised I had taken my credit card but not the banknote. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 198

You deserved it 27 585

By Yohm - 06/11/2008 09:41 - France

Today, I’m starting my 28th year with 28 cents on my bank account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 544

You deserved it 12 784

Rent hike to be expected

By Benji - 13/10/2008 08:32

Today, my 63-year-old neighbor jumped out of his window. I was the first to find him, alive, naked and stuck in a bush. I guess I shouldn't have laughed at him while waiting for the ambulance, because he turned out to be my landlord. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 384

You deserved it 24 150

By enjoy - 13/10/2008 08:30

Today, I lost my cell phone. But found it again! And then dropped it in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 357

You deserved it 23 103

By Marco - 13/10/2008 08:29

Today, the bank I use lost 5 billion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 205

You deserved it 12 105

Keywords

Animals Cats Miscellaneous Embarrassing Argument Party Neighbours Awkward Romantic Cute Love Stuck Roommate Clothes Relatable Shoes Mental health I need your advice Transportation Cars Insurance Weird LGBTQIA+ Teenagers Work Health Cheating Food Clumsy Dating

The Top

Today, I mistook a stranger in a supermarket aisle for an old friend and gave them a big bear hug from behind. Turns out, my "friend" was just now a very confused man in a very similar, but oddly specific jacket that I thought my actual friend had claimed he made himself. Guess not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 205

You deserved it 354

Today, I had to give back the Christmas present to who I thought was my best friend. He asked me to be his girlfriend and I declined. Apparently, because I don’t feel the same way he does, I don’t deserve it. I was under the impression that he’d given me this present to be a friend, not to get in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 486

You deserved it 175

The Top

Today, I finally decided to accept a date proposal from a guy who's had a crush on me for years. I got into his car, and it smelled strongly of my middle school perfume. I went into his bedroom and saw my middle school class photos hanging everywhere. Let's just say I ran home that night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 244

You deserved it 998

Today, the lip balms I ordered online finally arrived in the mail. After trying one out, my lips had an allergic reaction. It's a 4-pack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 852

You deserved it 1 044

Today, I discovered how my ex-girlfriend exacted her revenge. Every item of clothing I own now has sequins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 598

You deserved it 11 794

Today, the girl I really thought I had feelings for told me she kissed me on the cheek because I’m a sweet person, but she doesn’t want to be my partner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 640

You deserved it 193

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to drink several shots of vodka after taking a pill that makes you sick when you drink. She puked all night and then blamed me for making her sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 395

You deserved it 160

Today, I tried out for cheerleading. The judges, two head cheerleaders, sized me up, burst out laughing and made fat jokes towards me. I fought back and called them, "twiggy fucking sluts." At that moment, the coach walked in and saw and reported me to the principal. The judges got off scott free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 046

You deserved it 324