Kids: Boom!

Boom!

By why do eggs explode - 12/10/2015 21:35 - Canada - Calgary

Today, while I was in the shower, my 4 year-old son wondered what would happen if he put 6 eggs in the microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 297

You deserved it 3 086

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Same thing different taste

By jimmy - 30/11/2015 21:27 - Canada - Orangeville

Today, my 5-year-old son put my car keys in the microwave thinking that they would 'warm up' my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 000

You deserved it 2 485

By Amber Rutledge - 27/01/2018 00:00

Today, my 2-year-old learned how to open the fridge lock. I came out of the bathroom to what she called a "scrambled egg breakfast". FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 836

You deserved it 440

By Danana - 26/01/2009 21:08 - Canada

Today, one of the kids I was babysitting tried to hard boil eggs using the microwave. You cannot hard boil eggs using the microwave. It makes a mess. This we have learned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 581

You deserved it 22 854

By EggBomb - 01/12/2016 18:22

Today, after boiling eggs my whole life, I wanted to try a packaged hard-boiled egg for the first time. I'd never had a cold egg before, so I thought it would be a good idea to warm it up. Now, I'm cleaning out a billion pieces of egg shrapnel in the microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 471

You deserved it 9 825

The people of TikTok must be stopped

By Phil The Man - 04/09/2023 05:00

Today, I was sitting on the couch watching TV when I felt something crack on my head. My 6 year-old son had just smashed an egg into my hair. When I asked why, he said, "Mom does it for TikTok." This is how I found out that my wife has been "pranking" him for likes, and thinks it's hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 813

You deserved it 118

By Laura - 11/03/2011 05:20 - United States

Today, I was waiting for the pan to heat up so I could make myself scrambled eggs. Just then, my mom runs up to me, cracks an egg open on my head, and runs away laughing. I only had one other egg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 566

You deserved it 4 607

By Anonymous - 06/11/2014 12:15 - United States - Gainesville

Today, my eight-year-old microwaved our thermometer to see if the temperature would change. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 719

You deserved it 4 258

By sunil - 13/06/2014 22:53 - Canada - Calgary

Today, my 8-year-old son microwaved his pet hamster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 615

You deserved it 9 923

Hair care

By hairball - 22/04/2009 00:12 - United States

Today, my shower is being renovated so I washed my hair in the kitchen sink. I put my two year-old son on the counter next to me so I could keep him close. As I was rinsing out my hair, my son started playing with the light switches. He flicked the garbage disposal by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 816

You deserved it 28 701

By Anonymous - 13/08/2013 08:49 - France - Paris

Today, my 7-year-old son proudly announced that he had laid an egg during the night. I checked. He'd simply shat the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 596

You deserved it 4 253

strike2867 13

Tuesday 13 October 2015 16:07

Sounds like a great opportunity to teach him to clean a microwave.

jenninyc1128 17

Tuesday 13 October 2015 15:55

The wonder of having small kids.. Good luck with that clean up!

Comments

paravoz 30

Wednesday 14 October 2015 8:13

So he was alone while you were in the shower?

Bi0xHazard 18

Wednesday 14 October 2015 11:23

You see chaos but I see science experiment

Humuckachiki 9

Wednesday 14 October 2015 12:35

Did you beat the little shit?

S1N9UL4R17Y 8

Wednesday 14 October 2015 17:17

ah the joys of having children.

team_hale 11

Wednesday 14 October 2015 17:24

Why did you leave him to take a shower?

Briggs13 2

Wednesday 14 October 2015 18:39

There's no way a 4 year old can reach my microwave... maybe you should fix that...

iNicoLTD 23

Wednesday 14 October 2015 19:41

For Science!

missjess05 10

Thursday 15 October 2015 4:44

The joy of having a toddler

momac86 17

Thursday 15 October 2015 9:02

And you left him alone because? Special kind of stupid

samlovesham1234 9

Thursday 15 October 2015 22:24

I feel so sorry for you having to clean that mess up. I hope you made him help. Wasn't he supervised though?

Keywords

Cats Animals Gross Poopoo peepee Relatable Health Kids Mental health Parents Creepy Scary Cold weather Miscellaneous Embarrassing Love Dating Tinder Work Cute Transportation Cops Awkward Crush Sports Teachers Education AITA Weddings Public freakouts Mother in law

The Top

Today, I got in an argument with my boss and I dared him to fire me because he has always said he couldn’t run the shop without me. Turns out he was just being nice all this time, my job could in fact be done by his 14 year-old niece with no training in two thirds the time. Yes, he fired me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153

You deserved it 1 783

If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 12

The Top

Today, I was walking my dog but every time he looked like he was about to "go", he became uninterested with the spot and kept walking. I, following behind, tripped over a bump in the sidewalk and face planted. My dog then finally urinated, all over my aching body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 394

You deserved it 4 660

Today, I fainted during my sister's wedding because my dress was too tight. When I woke up, she slapped me hard across the face. Why? Because I "took all the attention away" from her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 164

You deserved it 7 787

Today, my parents called me to ask if I could drop my dog off to them on Sunday. They're having a Superbowl party and want to show her off to their guests. My dog is invited, but I'm not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 260

You deserved it 1 749

Today, my Nana asked me to get her a book from her nightstand, but failed to specify which nightstand was hers. I stumbled across my grandparents' collection of sex toys instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 085

You deserved it 313

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to see more of his passionate side. He pushed my head down towards his lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 514

You deserved it 14 026

Today, since I'm still recovering from my surgery and can't drive, my daughter drove me to the doctor. When I was done and walked outside, she was nowhere to be seen. Then I got a text, saying, "Sorry, I forgot I have to be somewhere." The closest bus stop to our house is miles away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 875

You deserved it 2 383

Boom!

Same thing different taste

The people of TikTok must be stopped

Hair care

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