Caught in 404p

By Anonymous - 30/06/2009 04:49 - Canada

Spicy
Today, my mom had a talk with me while my dad was out. She said to stop using her lotion for my masturbation sessions. I asked her how long did she know. She replied with, "Ever since we put up that camera in the living room for burglars, where you happen to watch your porn." FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 313
You deserved it 51 571
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Top comments

TheUnknown_fml 9

Shouldn't you notice a camera? But do it in your room next time. -.-

101 2

Comments

aback 4

Should have thought that one through, Spanky.

2 0
nilofc 0

You should abandon that hobby of yours. It will not do you good. It's not fine to view women as sex objects. And one more thing....do not listen to teen agers here posting some advises that they themselves need a help from. It's like a blind leading the blind. To be in the grip of **** is to lead yourself in a very sinful lifestyle. Break away from it before you and your future family will suffer from it.

9 26
Tubasaurus 0

What's with you and the word sinful? You religious types are some of the most arrogant and condescending people I have ever heard.

11 5
ncochrum 0

Don't worry, not all of "us religious types" are like that. Only the closed minded, self-righteous, bible thumping, hypocritical religious people are, and they're the minority. The problem is, they're the only ones the rest of the world sees, labeling the entire congregation of Christians as closed minded, self-righteous, bible-thumping hypocrites.

8 1
rayrayy_fml 0

I'm sorry, but that in itself was just...priceless. Who the hell are you? I'll wank off whenever I please, crazy.

8 2
fxdxhk90 0

Jackass, go preach at a church, no one on this site wants to hear your religious bullshit.

3 4
cms70 0

Closed minded, self-righteous, bible thumping, hypocritical religious people are definitely not in the minority in my state. I've been to dozens of churches all over the place of all kinds of different denominations, and they are all the same! I've had Catholics tell me to stay away because I refuse to revolve my entire life around their retarded fish dinners during Lent, I've had Baptists tell me time and time again that I'm going to hell(and one lady walked up to my niece in church once and told her she couldn't see her soul because she happened to have a lip ring), Methodists have been the nicest to me...but they still judged me and turned their back as soon as I had any problems and they saw I wasn't perfect. IMO, there is no such thing as a Christian who is not an utter and complete asshole. Those who aren't and claim to be Christians, well for them its only a matter of time until they become disgusted with how ****** up their belief system is and leave it forever! Anyway, OP got what he deserved! Only morons ********** somewhere where they can get caught. Also,why the hell can't he buy his own damn lotion?

0 6
gothymama 0

****'s not bad. It helped me and my husband conceive our second child. Helped lower the stress level of TTC.

4 0
derriduh 0

#24, I'm 25, female, engaged, a feminist, and watch pornography. Not all pornography objectifies women, or is exclusively for men.

3 0
notcoolperson 0

why the **** can't anyone spell on here? #94, it's generalize.

0 3
afrbrunette 0

the "religious types" aren't always Christians. lots of other religions also wouldn't agree with masturbation. personally i don't care if what anyone does in their personal time, but not on the couch where i have to sit and watch tv...

1 0
nickm468 1

no one loves you piece of shit

0 1
tandem123 6

Well I am christian, but I recently started realizing how narrow minded religions are. I think that god would rather have us acknowledge that we believe in him, not sit in a room for hours at a time and chant to how great he is. I don't really understand why homosexuality is a sin. It's the peoples choice to be in a relationship with one of their own sex or not. And no meat on Fridays? What does that accomplish? I am leaning towards agnosticism recently

3 0
Inoku 0

OP: I apologize, I accidentally hit the FYL button. Consider the FYL number -1, because you totally deserved that. #24: Show me a man who doesn't look at **** and I'll give you my unicorn.

4 0
tunacansam 0

home alone jerk sessions r sweet

0 2
plutosaplanet 0

did any of you stop to consider that while it may be gross to ********** in the living room where other people may sit, he didnt have the ability to watch **** in his room due to no dvd player, computer, etc? at least he did it when he was home alone and he wasnt talked to about leaving a mess, maybe he sat on a towel =)

2 0
kitkatkelly 0

If he needs **** that badly to **********, he has bigger problems. I get that it's fun and it helps, but in the living room?

1 4
cattoe7 0

in your moms living room with your moms lotion.. and you can still get it up?

3 1
LocoChaz006 0

28, you do have a good point. I can't believe they didn't tell you about the camera! Beating the bishop in a shared room excessively is just wrong. At least take the DVD player to your room, or something!

0 2
kitkatkelly 0

Gross, man. Keep that shit private and buy your own goddamned lotion.

1 0
thrawg 0

hey at least she only said to stop using lotion...

3 0