Intimacy, Sex and Relatable: Chubby Love, by Bon Iver - FML

Chubby Love, by Bon Iver

By Anonymous - 11/12/2021 07:59

Spicy

Today, I realised that my husband and I have gotten so fat that his already small dick no longer even reaches me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 918

You deserved it 1 508

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Same thing different taste

By dawg3360 - 07/06/2009 06:02 - Canada

Today, I noticed I have to lift up my fat to see my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 639

You deserved it 134 208

Missing

By SignificantShrinkage - 08/10/2018 03:00

Spicy

Today, I found out that when you gain too much weight, your penis can get significantly smaller. After noticing that things had been "off" in the bedroom, my girlfriend and I decided to measure it. There was significant shrinkage. I guess it's time to start working out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 971

You deserved it 1 921

By Anonymous - 26/12/2017 06:00

Today, I learned that my husband is attracted to obese, unhealthy women after celebrating my weight loss of 175lbs and improving my overall health. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 262

You deserved it 421

By chewybarseventy - 24/08/2010 06:17 - United States

Spicy

Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 499

You deserved it 11 071

By sal - 19/08/2012 02:48 - United States - Rexburg

Spicy

Today, I had to finally accept that my husband is too large for me. Normally, it'd be a bragging point, except my private parts can't handle it. After several infections brought on after vaginal tearing, I'm having to choose between being in perpetual pain, or giving up my sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 913

You deserved it 4 052

By apparentfatty - 11/11/2011 11:50 - Canada

Today, I found out that my husband thinks I'm fat when I caught him slipping diet pills into my morning smoothie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 329

You deserved it 7 133

By Anonymous - 09/10/2012 08:38 - United States - Murrieta

Spicy

Today, I noticed that my penis looks tiny in my girlfriend's hands. Without thinking, I pointed it out to her. Now she thinks I have a small cock, and I think she has man-hands. Either way, we're both turned off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 144

You deserved it 36 928

Letting go

By Anonymous - 17/05/2023 15:00

Spicy

Today, after 5 years of marriage, my once-gym-mad husband is now so unfit that even standard missionary sex makes him so breathless and light headed, he has to stop in case he passes out. He hasn’t given me an orgasm in over a year and yet he insists nothing's wrong with him, and that I’m just being mean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 362

You deserved it 271

By foutu - 21/02/2010 11:52 - France

Spicy

Today, while my wife was watching me get undressed she said "Bloody hell, you really are getting a beer belly. And it makes your already tiny willy look even tinier." All her accusations are true. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 759

You deserved it 7 736

By Anonymous - 15/05/2011 04:41 - United States

Spicy

Today, I realized that my pubes are longer than my penis itself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 719

You deserved it 26 759

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 11 December 2021 11:50

If only there were some magical way to reduce fatness, that might solve your problem. I hope humanity can solve that conundrum! Maybe your husband can tape a white cane with a red tip to his dick and poke you with it?

spinningrecords 14

Saturday 11 December 2021 17:22

Effective birth control.

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 11 December 2021 11:50

If only there were some magical way to reduce fatness, that might solve your problem. I hope humanity can solve that conundrum! Maybe your husband can tape a white cane with a red tip to his dick and poke you with it?

spinningrecords 14

Saturday 11 December 2021 17:22

Effective birth control.

cuz803 44

Saturday 11 December 2021 23:47

Savage!!

DarkAngelsBlade 25

Tuesday 21 December 2021 23:17

At least it's a y'all problem that can be worked on?

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, my husband threw a bitch-fit and made passive aggressive remarks throughout the entire day. What did I do? Call him out on commenting an eggplant, peach, and winky face emoji under a female friend’s picture. He deactivated all social media accounts and shouted, “Are you happy now? I can’t talk to anyone now!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 94

Today, I arrived at a camp and met one of my roommates. At bedtime, I had energy still, so I did push-ups. The guy was asleep or so I thought because he was facing the wall. The guy thought I was jacking off and told everyone I did it in the middle of our room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 863

You deserved it 2 846

The Top

Today, it's Friday the 13th. I've never been superstitious, and I figured it would be a normal day, that is until my hot water heater exploded and rained water into my downstairs neighbour's apartment for two hours before anyone noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 736

You deserved it 2 429

Today, my toddler was supposed to be taking a nap. Instead, he decided it was the perfect time to remove his own nappy for the first time ever. He painted his walls, floor, bed and body, then started crying because he was dirty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 050

You deserved it 340

Today, my boyfriend told me he couldn't spend the day with me as he had his grandmother's funeral. Lonely, I went shopping and I bumped into his mum having lunch with his 'dead' grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 555

You deserved it 2 945

Today, I poured my heart out into what had to be my greatest set of lyrics for my band ever, at the same time my teacher was explaining chemical changes to the class. At the end of the lecture he picked up my paper, and set it on fire to demonstrate a chemical change. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 277

You deserved it 33 834

Today, I tested a new drug designed to fight headaches. It had quite an effect on me, more specifically side effects: nausea, dizzyness and diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 353

You deserved it 4 770

Today, after the opportunity for a little malicious compliance came my way, and I did exactly what my prick boss told me to do, knowing it would screw him over in about a week, it happened. Unfortunately, he has a good legal team and he just successfully sued me for £100,000. I may have to sell my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 811

You deserved it 614