Cloud Cuckooland - FML

Cloud Cuckooland

By Perry85 - 04/03/2020 03:02

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend's husband heard us having sex, but he's so naive, he believed her when she said we were just watching porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 3 349

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Same thing different taste

By sportyhusband - 20/01/2010 03:46 - United States

Spicy

Today, I heard the sounds of women grunting in the living room. My husband knows I don't like him to watch porn, so I confronted him. He was masturbating to professional Women's tennis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 173

You deserved it 26 349

Revealing

By kitkat545 - 15/06/2009 23:18 - United States

Spicy

Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 079

You deserved it 51 000

By Korisite - 30/10/2011 05:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 259

You deserved it 25 002

Sounds hot

By oops999 - 19/11/2013 19:46 - United States - Downingtown

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 014

You deserved it 9 487

By giantcuntflaps - 13/12/2014 16:03 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 530

You deserved it 6 871

By anonymous - 06/09/2016 03:05 - United States - Monroe

Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 343

You deserved it 2 236

By anon - 25/10/2010 05:42 - United States

Spicy

Today, I found out my boyfriend watches porn. Specifically, today, while I was in the shower. In the next room. We were alone in the house and he still chose porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 727

You deserved it 7 175

Just a movie

By IzzMeister - 15/12/2019 20:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my uncle watching porn. I realized that it was porn featuring my boyfriend, and he told me that the girl in it was "just a friend". FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 034

You deserved it 206

By whoawhoawhoa - 28/12/2010 22:04 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 632

You deserved it 4 984

Perv

By niquey62307 - 08/12/2009 03:36 - United States

Spicy

Today, I found out my neighbor has been watching my husband and I have sex for the 2 years we've been married. He slaps his sausage and smokes 5 cigarettes while he watches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 355

You deserved it 5 783

Next

Top comments

FireMars 14

Wednesday 4 March 2020 3:17

That poor man, honestly. To cheat on him is disrespectful, but to have sex while he's at home is even more so. He deserves better. The guy knows, he just doesn't want to lose what he has; even if he is been made a joke out of.

Itsheragain 9

Wednesday 4 March 2020 5:15

thats terrible...your karma is coming my friend.

Comments

FireMars 14

Wednesday 4 March 2020 3:17

That poor man, honestly. To cheat on him is disrespectful, but to have sex while he's at home is even more so. He deserves better. The guy knows, he just doesn't want to lose what he has; even if he is been made a joke out of.

Taylor Caldwell 10

Thursday 5 March 2020 17:23

I totally read this differently as two couples are somewhere together and the one couple heard the other couple having sex and the wife said it was just ****. Jeez English is tough.

FireMars 14

Thursday 5 March 2020 17:50

It can be yeah.

Itsheragain 9

Wednesday 4 March 2020 5:15

thats terrible...your karma is coming my friend.

WistayShlaio82 13

Wednesday 4 March 2020 8:18

Well aren’t you just a poster child for privilege

Audrey Gogoj 4

Wednesday 4 March 2020 8:19

what the **** is wrong with you? he knows. he just can't bring himself to leave.

Mathalamus 24

Wednesday 4 March 2020 8:28

I hope it was worth it...

juggalo2 20

Wednesday 4 March 2020 12:34

Sounds like she's betraying a trusting soul. An actual human would feel bad in this situation.

ojoRojo 27

Wednesday 4 March 2020 15:44

“Today, my girlfriend’s husband—“ YDI.

spinspinsugar 12

Thursday 5 March 2020 0:20

no it's f his life cuz his wife is a ho

distortedcognition 17

Thursday 5 March 2020 1:31

You sure used a lot of words just to say “I’m a piece of shit”

Nhayaa 21

Thursday 5 March 2020 6:06

I like how you shorten things. Good summary of the situation.

J15237 25

Thursday 5 March 2020 2:22

Karma is a bitch dude. What the **** is the matter with you? You are aware that she is married? Damn at least have some respect for the other guy. Yes he is a bit dumb for believing her, but seriously I hope that you and the girl go to hell. And to cheat in his own house? How disrespectful.

Keywords

Cheating Love Relatable Work Money My ex Jealousy Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 9

Today, a friend and I tell each other everything about our relationships, and we’ve been flirting for two years, but we’re not together. I started to have feelings for him, but I didn’t say anything, then the guy started to disappear and I don't know if he has an avoidant attachment, or he's just ignoring me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 495

The Top

Today, during a school trip to Ireland, I tried taking a souvenir picture of a sheep wearing my sunglasses. So, if you ever see a sheep running past with sunglasses on, they're mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 573

You deserved it 515

Today, I was told I'm lazy by my boyfriend because I skipped work. He skips his all the time and when I get home still have to cook and clean up after him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 933

You deserved it 300

Today, the parent of a student called to ask me about a homework assignment. At the end of the call, she told me that I seem to be losing my "Asian accent" from when she first talked to me in the summer. I was born in the US, grew up in NJ and speak perfect English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 889

You deserved it 3 397

Today, I was in an elevator with my brother and a woman. He signs to me that she has a 'damn fine ass'. I chuckle and then shake my head. He shrugs. A second later the woman signs to us, 'Rick, don't you remember me?' Turns out she helped teach my brother sign language when he was six. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 013

You deserved it 25 888

Today, my family and I argued whether getting a period or boner in the middle of class was worse. At the dinner table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 560

You deserved it 13 406

Today, I realized anytime I try to say anything, relatives will talk over me, change the subject, or go off on tangents about ancient family history that I don't want to hear for the 1000th time. Yet if I interrupt them once, I'm the bad one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 954

You deserved it 102