Conflict Resolution By FML Approved - 06/10/2017 03:00 This is basically me during every conflict I've ever witnessed. I agree, your life sucks 451 You deserved it 111 Share Tweet Share
Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML I agree, your life sucks 11 787 You deserved it 22 728
Today, I was on a blind date with a girl my friend set me up with. We went to a fancy restaurant and she ordered the shrimp. I told her, "I'm allergic to shrimp, so you shouldn't order it in case I want to kiss you later." She looked at the waiter and said, "I'll have the shrimp." FML I agree, your life sucks 68 089 You deserved it 35 654
Today, I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me for six months with my best friend of five years. After asking him what she had that I didn't, he responded with one word - "Boobies." FML I agree, your life sucks 40 865 You deserved it 4 656
Today, I found out my "nice" boss was only nice to me for my first month. She's now started yelling at me for every little thing. FML I agree, your life sucks 844 You deserved it 90
Today, I saw my picture in an architecture magazine. I'm not an architect. I was walking up a flight of "magnificently built" stairs as my skirt lifted to show an absence of underwear. FML I agree, your life sucks 21 501 You deserved it 38 839
Today, I was mugged by a guy in a Santa suit. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 146 You deserved it 3 215
Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML I agree, your life sucks 41 328 You deserved it 6 150
Today, my brother babysat for me. He invited his girlfriend around without me knowing, and they were all playing hide and seek together. While he and his girl were hiding, they decided to have a quickie. My three year old found them and saw everything. She won't stop copying their sex noises. FML I agree, your life sucks 41 204 You deserved it 3 638
dude knows what's up haha
Ha me