Dilbert 2023

By Robert Smith's Lipstick - 08/10/2023 10:00

Today, I tried impressing my colleagues by using fancy business jargon during a meeting. I ended up saying, "Let's synergize our ideation to maximize the bandwidth of our paradigm shift." Nobody had a clue what I meant, and me neither to be honest. FML
I agree, your life sucks 96
You deserved it 1 281

Same thing different taste

Top comments

A lot of corporate babble is "fake it till people's interpretations of what you're saying make you look smart", but apparently there is a limit.

You stupid ****! If you synergize your ideation you miniaturize the bandwidth of your paradigm shift. That's called groupthink! You need to blue-sky your core competencies to get the 30,000-foot view and boil the ocean. Jeez!

Comments

A lot of corporate babble is "fake it till people's interpretations of what you're saying make you look smart", but apparently there is a limit.

35 years of business meetings and in NONE of those is more than one of those terms used. Rarely at that are they used. Typically anyone using the words is spotted and called out for total BS. Keeping this short, YDI.

Maybe avoid the all-night thesaurus read-a-thon before your next meeting, champ.

Christina Winden 22

Speak like a human. You sound like a pretentious ass when you try to use a fancy word every two seconds.

I have to steal it for my next annual meeting. The colleagues will laugh their head off!

You stupid ****! If you synergize your ideation you miniaturize the bandwidth of your paradigm shift. That's called groupthink! You need to blue-sky your core competencies to get the 30,000-foot view and boil the ocean. Jeez!

people sound like an ass when they use business jargon mumbo jumbo. unfortunately the younger generation is now using it for dating. I heard a girl say she does a 'soft launch' with guys, you know, seeing a bunch of them casually before she picks one for a hard launch wtf!?! hahahahahahah. get over yourself bud.

I never understood the cliche or Stereotype of someone using techno babble or fancy jargon to try and sound smart. it makes you look like a douche...