Miscellaneous: Dude, seriously? - FML

Dude, seriously?

By nuberific - 05/03/2009 18:45 - Canada

Today, I was in the changing room at the local YMCA. I went to use the hair dryer but couldn't because a naked old man was bent over, butt cheeks spread wide with his hands, and ass aimed at the dryer. He seemed to be enjoying it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 360

You deserved it 3 497

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 06/12/2011 18:07 - United States

Today, while at the laundry mat, an old man kept putting extra quarters in my dryer. I didn't realize until a while later what he'd done, just so he could keep watching me bend over to see how much time was left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 139

You deserved it 5 110

Wobble wobble

By Dr.Octopus454 - 07/10/2011 14:58 - United Kingdom

Today, working as a life guard, I walked through the changing room to go back to the pool. On the way, a naked old man started up a conversation with me. We talked for 10 minutes about pool chemicals, while his penis wobbled around with every small movement. This happens all the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 150

You deserved it 3 628

We could be heroes

By OhPleaseNo - 07/04/2020 14:00 - OhPleaseNo

Today, I was at work at my local hospital. I went to the toilet to empty my bladder; the door was half open so I assumed it was empty. Upon opening the door, I was greeted with a half naked old man, who then yelled at me and violently shat himself, all over the walls and floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 717

You deserved it 205

By lateralligator - 12/12/2014 16:35 - Canada - Whitchurch-stouffville

Today, I took out my old hairdryer and turned it on. I then gave my roommate a show as I ran out of the bathroom, naked and screaming, after a spider was blasted out of the hairdryer and directly at my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 001

You deserved it 4 610

By beep_guacamole - 24/05/2009 21:49 - United States

Today, I went to the laundromat. I put a load in the dryer and walked away to check on my other load. When I came back, I saw a homeless man putting his dirty, wet underwear in the dryer with my clean clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 338

You deserved it 4 630

By curlyisnogood - 10/01/2011 00:19

Today, I walked in on my roommate flat-ironing his pubic hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 236

You deserved it 3 759

Why hello there...

By Shocked - 28/01/2018 19:00

Today, while looking at a house to buy, I opened a bathroom door. There was a naked man on the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 700

You deserved it 435

Bigfoot

By Hairy ass - 08/02/2024 00:00 - Germany - Frankfurt am Main

Today, in the locker room, I saw a girl with a nice hairless ass changing in front of me and the only thing I could think of was how hairy my ass would look if I dared to change in front of other people like she did. I’m also a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 183

By Anonymous - 13/03/2010 09:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 781

You deserved it 10 100

By Anonymous - 06/11/2010 04:31 - United States

Today, after getting out of the shower, I was in a good mood. So I decided to run around the house naked, then play air guitar while air drying, just for fun. My blinds were open, and the men in the Fedex truck in my front yard did have fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 631

You deserved it 34 569

Next

Top comments

0___0 9

Thursday 5 March 2009 23:13

And I thought seeing old ladies' saggy **** in the changing room at YMCA was bad..

Rawer 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 23:04

That must have been scary o.o

Comments

mizled 0

Friday 6 March 2009 11:58

#43 LMAO!

yuyo_fml 0

Friday 6 March 2009 12:27

i hope it burned his ass

LMent 0

Friday 6 March 2009 13:36

I am struggling mightily not to burst into laughter, especially after reading the comments. I am in the crowded compuiter lab in my school right now BAHAHAHAHa

fmobus 0

Friday 6 March 2009 16:04

Today, I found out, while trying to dry my butt hair, that I get extreme pleasure when I point the dryer directly to my ass. It only works with the gym's hair dryer thou. FML

000001 0

Friday 6 March 2009 20:04

Wow. Just the thought scarred me for life. (Sucks to be you.)

cuttybuddy 0

Friday 6 March 2009 20:17

He was just trying to get his asshole dry. Whats the problem here?

FriendlyShadows 0

Friday 6 March 2009 21:49

O_o Don't google Goatse...*shivers* I will never be the same again.....*twitches*

jagoffconsultant 0

Friday 6 March 2009 22:40

the goatman cometh

ccmc3 0

Friday 6 March 2009 23:01

THIS IS SICK

nando92 0

Friday 6 March 2009 23:43

ive had that happen to me when i was in the locker room in a gym once i was kinda scared

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Keywords

Food Toxic Miscellaneous Family Gross Valentine's Day Love Health Home improvement Homeowners Awkward Drugs Kids Babysitter Music Lonely Crush Wanker Intimacy Relatable Cats Animals Work Coworkers Airplanes Transportation Sleep Embarrassing Mental health Cute

The Top

Today, while waiting in line for the ski lift, the lady behind me kept stepping on my skis. Annoyed, I turned around and shouted at her, "Get the fuck off my skis!" Just as the last word escaped my mouth, I noticed that my skis were crossed and it was actually me stepping on them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 941

You deserved it 63 789

Today, I finished a fence around my house that I have been working on all week. About an hour after I finished, a water company truck pulled into my driveway. They told me they would have to take down my fence to make repairs on a water pipe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 346

You deserved it 3 209

The Top

Today, I'm at the ER because my 13-year-old nephew ate an aromatic candle that smelled like chocolate. He saw it on my dresser and actually though it was chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 906

You deserved it 120

Today, a lady asked for a refund for a taco kit because inside the box was just tortillas, seasoning and sauce. When I pointed out the text in small letters that she had to provide her own ingredients, she told my manager I disrespected her by making her feel stupid. I was written up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 275

You deserved it 78

Today, my 82-year-old great grandfather informed me that his "peeter" still works, and that most guys his age can't say the same. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 716

You deserved it 2 223

Today, a girl confessed that she's loved me for years and wants to marry me and have my children. It was my half-sister and she said it in front of everyone at a family wedding. I don't know who to be most afraid of at this point: her fiancé or my stepdad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 017

You deserved it 179

Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one of the model washrooms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 611

You deserved it 3 408

Today, while I was pooping on company time, a little constipated, I saw a spider full speed running towards me, as I’m mid grunt. This makes my asshole slam shut and set my feet flailing to stomp it before it got any closer. Now I have heart palpitations and I feel violated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 458