Intimacy, Sex and Wanker: Fantasy world

Fantasy world

By Anonymous - 27/08/2021 16:01

Today, as I was approaching climax with the girl of my dreams, my mom walked in to ask if I had her car keys, took one look and told me I need to get out, find a real woman and stop watching porn with my headphones on, so I can hear when people are climbing the stairs to my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 2 008

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By wowthatwould - 04/12/2011 21:39 - United States

Today, I was watching porn when I heard my mom call for me. I closed my laptop right as she walked in my room. The sound, however, kept going. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 408

You deserved it 46 708

Lock your doors

By Anonymous - 27/05/2019 00:14

Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 471

You deserved it 764

MILF

By Anonymous - 12/11/2020 08:03

Today, I was watching porn and found my mom on a webcam. When I told her that I saw her, she just took away my computer and told me to get off porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 294

You deserved it 601

By Anonymous - 27/08/2014 21:50 - United States - Franklin Park

Today, I bought some noise-canceling headphones. They work well. Too well. My mom came home, unpacked her shopping, walked upstairs, knocked on my door, opened my door, and found me jacking off to a porno, all without me hearing a thing. Fucking hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 404

You deserved it 43 184

Handy

By Anonymous - 06/03/2011 18:15 - Sweden

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 901

You deserved it 11 994

Knock next time please

By Anonymous - 09/11/2020 21:32 - India

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 966

You deserved it 791

By Anonymous - 26/06/2015 18:08 - Russian Federation - Moscow

Today, my mom kicked my dad out of the house and told him not to come home again. Why? I started watching some porn on my computer, forgetting I was still connected to the bluetooth speakers in the living room. My mom thought it was my dad, and I didn't have the balls to admit the truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 347

You deserved it 41 593

In the mood

By Steve - 16/12/2012 06:25 - United States - Oshkosh

Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 806

You deserved it 18 371

Now watching

By Anonymous - 14/01/2011 23:07 - United Kingdom

Today, I came home, turned on my laptop, and turned the TV on mute so I could check my email. My mom came home an hour later, took a look at me on the couch, then the TV, and asked what on earth I was watching. I looked up from my laptop and realized it was porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 785

You deserved it 32 356

Keep your wits about you

By Rawr - 30/12/2009 01:05 - United States

Today, I was really horny after some dirty texts from my boyfriend. Since everyone seemed to be sleeping, I closed my eyes and started to touch myself. I was really close to climaxing when I opened my eyes and made eye contact with my mother staring at me as I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 472

You deserved it 11 684

CRC_101 31

Friday 27 August 2021 23:39

I mean, she's probably not wrong if you're calling a girl in a **** video the girl of your dreams.

Jon Tessler 14

Friday 27 August 2021 18:26

doors have locks on them for a reason

Comments

Aiden89 23

Friday 27 August 2021 16:44

Maybe shave the neck beard too

Jon Tessler 14

Friday 27 August 2021 18:26

doors have locks on them for a reason

cacheson 41

Sunday 29 August 2021 2:28

Not everyone’s door has a lock. My room didn’t when I was a teenager

Hangryko 29

Friday 27 August 2021 18:44

YDI for not locking your door.

RichardPencil 30

Friday 27 August 2021 19:23

The girl of your dreams lets you watch **** while you're having sex with her? Hmm, not on my list of dream girl attributes, but whatever. Hope she wasn't too insulted by your mom's rude comment.

jkjorn 16

Friday 27 August 2021 20:26

Mamma knows best! I'd heed her advice if I were you.

Plop 17

Friday 27 August 2021 20:48

You weren't "approaching climax with the girl of [your] dreams". You were jerking it in your bedroom while watching ****. There's nothing wrong with taking care of oneself, but it's quite pathetic that you feel the need to phrase it like you were doing something romantic. The girl of your dreams is probably getting rawdogged as we speak by some guy who doesn't spend his days beating his meat in a basement while thinking about her.