Dont bring freaking feminism into it. All she had to do was be honest, " sorry Im not interested in you." Wow what a concept.

I remember one time another female friend and I were at a bar, meeting up for a visit after working on our feet all day, and just wanting to hang out, having not seen each other in a while. We were deep in our conversation when a guy comes up and politely asks if either of us would like to dance. We smile, and politely reply, "No, thank you." Cue ten-minute rant about what complete ***** we were for shooting him down in front of his friends, and why didn't we just kick him in the ass while he was down, no, really, go on, just ******* kick me in the ass! And he's yelling at us, and bending over sticking his ass out at us, and no one else does anything to stop him and we had no other option that we could think of (not wanting to get up and leave because he would have followed us into the parking lot and might have gone from verbally abusive to physically abusive) aside from what we did, which was to wait him out, hang out for a few more minutes to make sure he was gone, and ******* end our night. You have shit like that happen often enough, then you learn that "just say[ing] 'no'" is something to be avoided, because it can be dangerous, and you have no ******* way to predict who will flip out on you. So it becomes far better to make up some bullshit excuse so he can go away happy, with his ego intact, thinking, "Oh, she was totally into me and totally would have gone out with me if she hadn't already made plans." Because gods forbid you imply in any way that you might just not be interested. Women make shit up to get out of going out/dancing/having sex with some guy because if we "just say 'no'," we can get hurt. It's bullshit, but there you go. We pretend we would, but, you know, we already have a thing; you pretend we actually would if we didn't already have a thing; you don't feel let down; we don't get beat up.