Health: Grandpa's got game

Grandpa's got game

By Anonymous - 01/02/2017 20:00 - United States - Warren

Today, I tried out the high-tech eliptical at my gym. The 70-year-old man next to me who was also using one went faster and longer than I did, and unlike me didn't stop for a break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 185

You deserved it 1 302

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Same thing different taste

Feel the burn

By Slowsky - 09/05/2012 10:19 - United States - Claremont

Today, I was at the gym on the elliptical. Feeling proud of myself for finishing a very intense workout, I looked to my left to see that the maintenance guy fixing the machine next to me had burned more calories testing the machine than I did during my entire workout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 580

You deserved it 5 576

By Anonymous - 05/01/2010 20:16 - United States

Today, I picked the treadmill next to an old man so I could feel better about myself. He ran faster and longer than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 059

You deserved it 36 592

Having fun over there?

By Anonymous - 07/09/2024 00:00 - South Africa - Durban

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in quite a while. I was feeling pretty good about myself until I realized I'd been on the elliptical machine for twenty minutes without having actually turned it on. I was just moving the pedals and wondering why I wasn’t getting tired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 307

By likeyourboss - 04/10/2013 16:05 - Denmark

Today, I went to the gym. I tried out a new machine where you do one-arm weightlifting. I took my time to get into a good position, then set the machine to the lowest weight possible. I couldn't even lift it an inch. A bunch of buff guys nearby saw me and burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 716

You deserved it 5 952

By Anonymous - 18/01/2015 16:34 - Ireland

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 968

You deserved it 20 688

By Anonymous - 21/07/2015 17:50 - India - Bangalore

Today, I was trying to work out, and couldn't even complete an exercise regime meant for 50-year-olds. I'm 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 900

You deserved it 8 284

Baby steps

By Anonymous - 16/11/2024 21:00 - United States - Warren

Today, I started doing cardio at my local gym with a basic exercise bike because doing weightlifting by itself wasn't having an effect on my weight. Since I'm out of shape, I did 15 minutes instead of the standard 30. I had to stop at 10 minutes because my legs were so sore they nearly gave out on me when I stood up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 327

You deserved it 144

Fitness is overrated

By Frankie says relax - 10/12/2023 06:00 - United States

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. As I was on the treadmill, I accidentally hit the emergency stop button. In my attempt to play it cool, I tried to pretend it was intentional and yelled, "I've reached my fitness goal for the day!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 686

First impressions

By Anonymous - 01/12/2024 15:00 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I joined a gym. I’m overweight and not very athletic, so I was nervous. I looked around and tried a treadmill. I start walking at a chill pace, then got ambitious and cranked it to a "light jog." Within seconds, I tripped, fell, and sent the emergency stop button flying across the room. The gym staff ran over and I swear someone said, “Well, at least he’s trying.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 112

Jacked

By Gertland - 26/07/2024 16:00 - United States - Bakersfield

Today, I went to the gym and approached a machine I had never used before. After a few minutes of awkward attempts, an instructor came over and politely informed me I was using it completely wrong. The worst part? It was the stretching machine, and I thought it was for abs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 274

You deserved it 244

cootiequeen4444 11

Thursday 2 February 2017 2:15

On the flipside, I bet that boosted the 70 year old man's mood! "Today, I went on that new fangled walking machine at the locally gym. I went faster AND for a longer duration than the whippersnapper next to me! Didn't stop to dilly dally either ! Ain't that just dandy!" (last sentence translates loosely to "**** yeah!" in oldmanese).

RusticChick 27

Thursday 2 February 2017 2:05

If you're new to the gym, give it time. You'll be there in no time. Stay confident, OP!

Comments

WolliBolli 23

Thursday 2 February 2017 15:39

No worries man. Hes had longer time to become a machine. I know one, and he doesn't tire. Bastard never exercise, but can still outlast anyone on X-country skiing

Cali 54

Saturday 4 February 2017 7:05

Exactly this! I know a guy in his 70s who still runs marathons while I've never jogged further than the kitchen for snacks. I look healthier than him but I could never ever beat him in a fitness contest. Some old people are beasts.

emh86 14

Thursday 2 February 2017 22:19

This one is hard to judge.. he could have been a gym junkie for most of his life and you the first time you've set foot in a gym..

ACCOUNTKILLER 18

Friday 3 February 2017 2:15

For all you know, the old gentleman has been maintaining his fitness for a very long time. Don't compare yourself to others and keep your focus on your goals.