Embarrassing, Dreams, Nightmare and Work: Hard at work - FML

Hard at work

By scaredofbozo - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I woke up screaming after a nightmare about clowns, which wouldn't be too bad if I hadn't been surrounded by coworkers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 689

You deserved it 28 864

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Top comments

sailorzoe 14

Friday 11 March 2011 18:49

Did they laugh while they fired you?

Brave_Sir_Robin 4

Friday 11 March 2011 20:10

Can't sleep. Clowns will eat me. Can't sleep. Clowns will eat me. Can't sleep. Clowns will eat me. Can't sleep. Clowns will eat me. Can't sleep. Clowns will eat me. Can't sleep. Clowns will eat me.

Comments

Krystal3408 32

Saturday 10 August 2013 20:41

You were sleeping on the job, YDI

inkdeath87 18

Sunday 24 November 2013 18:54

This is what you get for sleeping on the job.

metroido 17

Sunday 22 May 2022 10:15

sometimes if i’m tired enough, i will fall asleep WHILE working. like i could even be standing up and doing physical activity, then blink and fall asleep. i wonder if op might have the same condition since not a single one of these commenters is considering that possibility.

Keywords

Weddings Awkward Miscellaneous My ex Love AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Relatable Mental health Therapy Argument Parenting Kids Thanksgiving Covid Medication Ironic Cute Sports Proposal Snow Cold weather Annoying Cheating Work Money

The Top

Today, during an episode of King of Queens that my boyfriend has seen more than once, I decided I'd try to get a little frisky. I straddled him while he was on the bed and began taking my clothes of. He pushed me out of the way and said, "Don't get naked in front of the TV." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 747

You deserved it 4 499

Today, I went to a restaurant with some friends. I noticed a very cute waitress about my age, so I walked over to her and asked if she had a boyfriend. The extremely fit, attractive waiter standing next to her immediately turned, held out his hand and goes, "Yeah. Meet me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 007

You deserved it 14 098

The Top

Today, the quality of my sex life reached a new low. I faked my orgasm. And so did he. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 180

You deserved it 27 958

Today, it was the first day of my job at a kindergarten. A boy fell over in the playground, so I ran over to see if he was OK. He got up and had a huge red mark on the side of his face. Shocked, I yelled "Oh my god, your face!" Turns out it's a very large port-wine birthmark and now he won't stop crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 864

You deserved it 15 651

Today, I went to a local concert. The singer from my favorite band stage-dived and I got to catch him. Unfortunately I was the only one to catch him. The next thing I know I'm pinned between him and the concrete floor as he finishes whatever part of the song he was on. He was fine, I hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 325

You deserved it 5 707

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 394

You deserved it 4 165

Today, I was giving a lecture to my class I heard a phone go off. Aggravated and exhausted, I asked everyone to turn their phones off. Then the phone rang again. I lost my shit and spent the next half hour calling my students a bunch of "technology whores". Then I realized the phone was mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 206

You deserved it 200 046

Today, and forever, I've never had a woman try to hit on me, so when my barista asked if I’d like to come to her place after her shift, I didn’t immediately realise she meant sex, so I actually stupidly said, “What for?” She got embarrassed and people glared at me like I was scum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 237

You deserved it 531