Embarrassing and Health: Health scare - FML

Health scare

By sillygoose - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I went to the doctor to check the dark growth I just discovered on my back. It was chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 379

You deserved it 44 958

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Top comments

jcash52426 5

Monday 9 January 2017 23:14

You know there is this thing that sprays hot and cold water out of the wall in you bathroom and if you rub soap on yourself and get under and scrub your body then you won't have food still stuck to your body. At the end of the day. Also how do get chocolate stuck on your body. Other then your hand and mouth from cooking or eating

HayNow 11

Friday 21 April 2023 17:40

Geez.... when did you last bathe? How long has it been there? So many questions

Comments

jcash52426 5

Monday 9 January 2017 23:14

You know there is this thing that sprays hot and cold water out of the wall in you bathroom and if you rub soap on yourself and get under and scrub your body then you won't have food still stuck to your body. At the end of the day. Also how do get chocolate stuck on your body. Other then your hand and mouth from cooking or eating

HayNow 11

Friday 21 April 2023 17:40

Geez.... when did you last bathe? How long has it been there? So many questions

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The Top

Today, I got home only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming the freezing streets calling his name, I returned to find him stuck behind the couch with my chewed-up new shoes in his muzzle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 306

You deserved it 6 441

Today, at a party I bumped into a friend of my ex. We caught the same bus home. He started telling me about my ex's "totally insane" ex-girlfriend. He refused to believe me when I told him he was talking about me. I had to sit there for half an hour as my personality was ripped to shreds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 179

You deserved it 5 878

The Top

Today, my cousin died of a very treatable illness. She was pressured into herbal and holistic "faith healing" instead of seeking "poisonous western filth". Her husband, church and family all seem to think she made the right choice. I’ve been shunned for disagreeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 480

You deserved it 100

Today, I was on my way to work and someone cut me off. I then switched lanes and sped past the person as I flipped them off. What I didn't notice was that the person that cut me off was my boss. He's been shooting me dirty looks from across the room all morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 994

You deserved it 5 795

Today, after 2 months of my new neighbours' kids throwing rocks at our cars, constantly swearing at us, bullying my siblings in and out of school, and vandalising our property, their mother has convinced the landlord that we're the ones out of control. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 081

You deserved it 2 709

Today, I went to a jeweler's to buy a ring to propose to my girlfriend. When I was at the restaurant, in mid-proposal, with people watching, I realized I had left the ring in the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 899

You deserved it 15 813

Today, I was running on a track above a basketball court. I noticed several cute guys playing a pick-up game, so I tried to run my hardest. Not paying attention, I didn't hear when they warned me about the ball flying towards me. It hit me in the head, I then ran into a wall and face-planted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 421

You deserved it 40 957

Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 472

You deserved it 12 274