Love: Hot stuff

Hot stuff

By Liam. - 01/02/2010 05:15 - France

Today, I was in an elevator, and the hot girl who lives in my building and who I have a crush on got in. She was in a wheelchair with a broken leg, I panicked and tried to flirt with her, and I said, "Nice chair." She replied, "Nice bruise" and punched me in the nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 655

You deserved it 51 991

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Same thing different taste

By wilsmith - 01/02/2010 12:36 - China

Today, while in the elevator with the girl from my office that I've been crushing on, but never spoken to, I said "aren't elevators awkward?" After a long silence, she got off three floors before our office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 577

You deserved it 26 626

By grabber - 09/08/2009 23:43 - United States

Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 356

You deserved it 11 010

Look where you're going, dude

By balancestrikesagain - 24/04/2009 09:37 - United States

Today, I was getting onto an airplane and happened to admire the stewardess. I was walking onto the plane and was just about to talk to her when my foot slipped into the crack between the boarding ramp and the plane. Not only did she laugh as I limped to my seat but now I have bruised nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 470

You deserved it 10 796

By Chris - 01/01/2011 05:06 - United States

Today, I was in the elevator with my female coworker and a very attractive teen in front of us. My coworker reached out and grabbed the boobs of the teen in front of us, and blamed it on me. I got yelled at, kneed in the crotch, and punched in the face. My coworker couldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 519

You deserved it 3 938

By PleaseDontHateMe - 20/09/2016 16:42 - Canada - Stony Plain

Today, I tried to impress a girl by draping my arm over the back of her chair. I ended up elbowing her in the nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 304

You deserved it 5 021

By TuralSucks - 11/03/2009 01:10 - United States

Today, I was the only one in an elevator when an attractive girl came in, talking on her phone. She told her friend, "I have to go, there's a cute guy on this elevator." Before I could even react, she turned to me and said, "Sorry for lying, I really wanted to get off the phone with her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 271 488

You deserved it 17 962

By ZeroLuck - 16/08/2013 02:32 - United States - Miami

Today, I was at the gym when I noticed a girl I like working out on the elliptical. I went to go say hi, but chickened out and went to run on the treadmill in front of her instead. I was so nervous that I tripped and the machine threw me headfirst into her machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 070

You deserved it 8 942

By Chris - 22/10/2009 04:57 - Canada

Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 426

You deserved it 4 883

Smooth gym bro

By Dkim620 - 07/01/2013 03:16 - United States

Today, I was running on the treadmill at my local gym when I saw a girl I like a lot. I called out to her to say hi. As she was coming over, I accidentally stepped on the belt with one foot, crashed down on the treadmill, and continued to slide down in front of her, emerging with a gashed knee and arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 500

You deserved it 4 374

By Greg - 16/12/2018 13:30

Today, I arrived to apply for my much-needed dream job. Without warning, just as the elevator opened, a complete stranger kicked me square in the nads. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 604

You deserved it 225

Rocyer 0

Monday 1 February 2010 12:21

Nice bruise.

doink 0

Monday 1 February 2010 12:24

Did she have a Hoveround? If she did then technically you wouldn't have been lying.

Comments

cainchild 4

Wednesday 30 May 2012 22:58

Violence against men is totally acceptable and hilarious. Imagine the genders being reversed.

Jewbenita 0

Thursday 9 August 2012 7:31

i dont see how making a sarcastic comment about her injury (im sure intended as a joke) would be considered a method of flirting. try starting a conversation if anything (ie: what happened to your leg?) then take things from there.

Peacelove0404 26

Wednesday 26 September 2012 4:13

Just ask "How'd you break your leg?" and keep up a conversation. Idiot.

drayloon 50

Sunday 2 December 2012 8:43

well thats the closest shes probably gonna get to touching your junk anyway

disguy115 4

Wednesday 19 December 2012 6:24

Girls need to understand that guys can be weird and say stuff like. They shouldn't just go around unching people in the nuts for one comment.

Dilwann 27

Thursday 4 April 2013 23:59

Such a guy thing to say... Guys need to get over girls being less pleasant when they're on their period. But do you stop complaining? No. So let us complain about guys being jerks while trying to 'flirt'.