Love, Health and Sex: Huge fan

No need to snatch up the chance to cliticize my puns, 65. It would seem you're an eager beaver when it comes to muff-ling my humor but I refuse to postpoon my comments about the female genitalia.

slacker_69 6

Friday 3 May 2013 4:50

when you hear things like this its usually the guy who does it. I am glad there are some women like this out there

generalasskicker 12

Friday 3 May 2013 4:51

You are not first

narkill 13

Friday 3 May 2013 4:50

Hail Clitler!

Axipiter 24

Friday 3 May 2013 4:51

Heil Clitler!

rg350dx 29

Friday 3 May 2013 5:00

Mein Furrier!

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 3 May 2013 5:06

@19 Is this fun for a grammar nazi?

karen1991 15

Friday 3 May 2013 4:50

Sooo do u have to salute it?

tygerarmy 35

Friday 3 May 2013 5:08

Two finger salute. Sometimes three.

Transfusion 8

Friday 3 May 2013 4:50

Everybody has their fetishes.

Keywords

Animals Cats Awkward Christmas Health Embarrassing Work Love Anniversary Boredom Ironic Abuse Intimacy Alcohol AITA Drunk Am I overreacting? Transportation Parents Kids Gun control Language Noise Mysterious Relatable Money Delivery Miscellaneous Food Family

The Top

Today, I ran into my manipulative ex-boyfriend at a party. We were chatting and I mentioned that the guys I have been seeing lately all turn out to be jerks. He said, "Yeah well, you dumped me and don't deserve to be happy." Apparently he has been creeping and scaring off any guys interested in me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 927

You deserved it 4 148

Today, it started pouring while I was in the middle of a pizza delivery. I had to stand out in the rain for ten minutes while an old redneck dude wearing nothing but camo boxers fumbled around for the exact change to pay the bill. I think seeing his junk was supposed to count as my tip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 793

You deserved it 3 231

The Top

Today, my mom had to go off on my grandmother because I don’t have kids yet and she, "wants great grand babies before she dies." My grandmother was going to gift me a baby outfit for me to get another hint. I’m 25 and can’t conceive because of health issues. I may never have my own kids. She knows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 552

You deserved it 138

Today, I spent most of my daughter's 8th birthday with her in the hospital while her broken arm was put in a cast. Apparently, my son had told her that some people gained the ability to fly on their 8th birthday before encouraging her to find out by jumping off the slippery slide. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 872

You deserved it 2 501

Today, I realized just how much my bad sex life has started affecting me, when after not being able to climax from masturbating, I instinctively faked an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 732

You deserved it 9 182

Today, after working my ass off for 2 months, receiving perfect reviews, and going out of my way to take on extra work to get a job offer from the location where I temp, I finally got an offer for a permanent position. Included in the offer was a $3.00 an hour pay cut and no insurance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 930

You deserved it 715

Today, my parents grounded me and took away my phone, iPod and door. That's right, my door. They think that because I was stumbling and couldn't walk straight last night, I must have been out drinking. They know I suffer from chronic vertigo, but don't believe I was having an attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 398

You deserved it 3 238

Today, an old lady on the street told me that I should be wearing a bra because my nipples were visible under my white tee. I am a 37-year-old man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 056

You deserved it 5 975