Work: I can't help it! - FML

I can't help it!

By ssssssssuck a dick, boss - 18/08/2013 17:29 - United States - Kalispell

Today, my manager took me aside and angrily told me to quit fucking about with our customers. He totally refuses to believe that the slight whistling sound I keep making when I exhale is because I have a chipped tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 585

You deserved it 3 193

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Same thing different taste

Gummy

By speechless - 02/11/2010 17:20 - Canada

Today, I had a toothache and applied some numbing gel to soothe the pain. Too much came out and made my whole mouth numb. A man came into my work, thought I was making fun of his lisp, and stormed out really upset. He later called to complain about me. The boss just called me to his office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 956

You deserved it 3 743

Make it stop

By whatzthehell - 03/06/2009 10:31 - Kuwait

Today, I woke up with a splitting headache. Then someone at work wouldn't stop whistling loudly and it was getting on my nerves. "Can the dick who is whistling please stop?" I asked. It was the general manager of my department. I'm still on probation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 631

You deserved it 51 444

By Anonymous - 16/02/2014 17:22 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, my boss bitched me out on the sales floor for a good 10 minutes, because I wasn't "smiling the right way" for our customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 030

You deserved it 3 918

By Anonymous - 20/08/2011 21:36 - United Kingdom

Today, my boss called me into his office and bitched me out for a good half hour for my attitude to our customers. Apparently I always look pissed off and sound sarcastic. That's just my face at rest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 478

You deserved it 5 568

By Anonymous - 11/03/2018 01:30

Today, my manager cussed me out for being unable to keep a customer happy. That "customer" was a senile old twit who had wandered away from his carer, thought our shop was his living room, and demanded to know who replaced all his furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 428

You deserved it 393

By Sorry Not Sorry - 01/11/2016 14:01

Today, my boss bitched me out for a customer complaint. The complaint was me not laughing at the customer's joke of me asking for his ID and him saying no. I'm sorry, I've been getting this joke a least twice a day since I started working here two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 474

You deserved it 650

Teeth gang!

By pridekills - 19/08/2012 04:19 - United States - Mulberry

Today, my coworker told me I should stop smoking cigarettes because it makes my breath "smell like shit" and makes my teeth look as yellow as corn. I've never smoked a cigarette in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 191

You deserved it 9 019

Snap!

By fax4voice3 - 28/08/2023 18:02 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I was flossing my teeth, which I do only to not get yelled at (chewed out?) by my dentist. Dentist I’ll now be seeing later today because the floss broke off a corner of one of my molars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 529

You deserved it 183

By maleficunt - 03/06/2014 20:44 - United Kingdom - Cannock

Today, a customer yelled at me so furiously that she sprayed my face with spittle. I had to stand there, smiling and politely explaining that I needed to see a receipt before I could give her a refund. When she finally gave up and left, my boss bitched me out for "provoking the customer". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 993

You deserved it 4 048

Make your mind up

By fuck you, boss - 21/12/2013 00:30 - United States

Today, my boss scolded me for being too friendly to our customers and told me to back off and let them do their thing. Less than an hour after doing as he said, he scolded me again, this time for slacking off and not asking them if they needed help finding stuff. There goes my bonus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 515

You deserved it 3 162

Next

Top comments

HeyHeyFishFillet 34

Monday 19 August 2013 2:07

So many douchebag/stupid boss-related FML's lately... how do those kind of people even get that position?

etishuman22 32

Monday 19 August 2013 2:10

Maybe you could tell him you're just trying to make the best of things? You know...whistling while you work? I'm sorry I immediately thought of the old Disney movie "Snow White and the Seven Dwarves" when I read this post.

Comments

angelitared 27

Monday 19 August 2013 5:10

This is so funny!!! Hahah! Poor thing!!

Scoty49 10

Monday 19 August 2013 5:10

Don't be a mouth-breather.

Lacist 19

Monday 19 August 2013 6:20

What if his nose is plugged, although I'm not sure but can't you just breath a different way with your mouth or is it air that just passes through the chipped tooth causing the sound?

Ducreaux 7

Monday 19 August 2013 6:58

Has he never seen the King and I??? Whistle a Happy Tuneeee

incoherentrmblr 21

Monday 19 August 2013 9:23

God forbid you become a pornstar...

ladyvidel 19

Monday 19 August 2013 10:49

You could always act like you're a Minecraft creeper. 'That'ssssss a nice office you have, bossss.'

Huddisher 10

Monday 19 August 2013 13:58

Most bosses are huge dicks.

honeymoonroyale 20

Monday 19 August 2013 14:35

What an asshole.

blueknight1st 26

Monday 19 August 2013 15:35

So quit being a mouth breather and breath through your nose. If I was your boss I would have told you the same thing.

judea95 16

Monday 19 August 2013 15:43

Breath through your nose? YDI

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I agree, your life sucks 193

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