Love and Health: Today, I rushed my wife to the ER because she was having abdominal...

By France Howell - 10/05/2018 15:00

Today, I rushed my wife to the ER because she was having abdominal pains. She was crying in the car and very faintly said, "If I die, our daughter goes to my sister and they get everything in my will." We later found out she was just having a bad gas problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 852

You deserved it 354

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Same thing different taste

By Tor - 21/04/2009 00:11 - United States

Today, I was in class and felt a sharp pain in my stomach. I began to scream and cry because the pain was horrible, so the teacher called 911. After being rushed to the hospital, I was told that "I had gas cramps and would be fine." My whole class was listening on speakerphone to make sure I was ok. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 810

You deserved it 12 958

The bed is lava

By for better or for farts - 06/08/2020 23:01

Today, my very pregnant wife woke up in bed, grabbing her stomach and writhing in pain. Worried that the baby might be in distress, I asked her what was wrong. She gasped then let out what can only be described as a river of hot liquid shit all over herself and my legs. We both cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 409

You deserved it 207

By Jeri - 26/02/2010 12:55 - United States

Today, I begged my husband to take me to the ER cause my stomach hurt so bad I thought I was gonna die. He told me to go sit on the toilet and stop being a drama queen. I drove myself to the hospital just in time for my appendix to burst. I almost died because my husband was busy playing Xbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 124

You deserved it 4 340

Lingering

By Anonymous - 11/07/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, I went on a date, and everything was going fine - until the ride home. On the way, I starting having progressively bad stomach pains. Once she left the car, I passed the worst gas that I had ever encountered. As I began to leave, she knocked on the window. She forgot her purse in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 577

You deserved it 5 476

By nolips - 19/11/2009 15:53 - Norway

Today, my girlfriend woke up very early in terrible pain. I drove her to the hospital and fell asleep in the waiting area. When I woke up, my car was gone and it was 9am. She had assumed I just walked home (32 miles), so she took the car. I was the only one in the waiting area. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 056

You deserved it 3 163

By Sam - 09/01/2018 19:00

Today, I had debilitating stomach cramps and told my mom, but she said she was too tired to take me to the ER. I had appendicitis. Thanks Mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 817

You deserved it 255

By dargas - 09/03/2010 21:08 - United States

Today, while preparing the house for company, I got a call that my sister had a heart attack and died. My wife's response? "Great! Now you're going to be no help to me at all!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 256

You deserved it 2 705

By alephnull - 02/02/2011 21:07 - Canada

Today, I drove a friend to the emergency room because he thought he had appendicitis. While sitting in the waiting room, I got puked on by a child. My friend's diagnosis? Gas. So he also farted all the way home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 111

You deserved it 3 134

Better out than in

By Anonymous - 20/05/2020 02:00

Today, I had the most excruciating pain I've ever felt in my lower right abdomen. I was doubled over and vomiting it hurt so bad. After going to the E.R., thinking it was my appendix and getting checked in, I let out the biggest most rancid fart in my life and the pain immediately went away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 906

You deserved it 413

A mother's love…

By Anonymous - 08/10/2020 14:01 - United States - Allentown

Today, I crawled into my mom's room to tell her my stomach was in massive pain. She ended up throwing me out of the room while spraying me with Lysol. My appendix was about to burst and I needed surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 830

You deserved it 109

OnReceivingEnd 17

Thursday 19 April 2018 22:14

"Well, that's a relief, you're going to be just fine....until we get home and we discuss your will."

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 10 May 2018 15:26

The new truth serum: unreleased farts. I hear the CIA has a massive inventory of butt plugs...dunh-dunh-dunh!

Comments

JasonThorn 20

Thursday 19 April 2018 20:53

Where I come from, they call that "advance warning."

OnReceivingEnd 17

Thursday 19 April 2018 22:14

"Well, that's a relief, you're going to be just fine....until we get home and we discuss your will."

CreeperReaperX 5

Sunday 13 May 2018 5:07

What was a relief? Letting all the gas out?

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 10 May 2018 15:26

The new truth serum: unreleased farts. I hear the CIA has a massive inventory of butt plugs...dunh-dunh-dunh!

Cookietaco74 9

Thursday 10 May 2018 15:39

Simple solution to this, write her out of your will! Just give everything to when your daughter turns into an adult.

Zekfen 17

Thursday 10 May 2018 15:46

Good news for you, unless y’all had a pre-nup, and the daughter is your biological child/adopted child, her will gets ignored. By marriage everything that was hers becomes yours.

jbuckets_404 38

Thursday 10 May 2018 15:59

Not sure if your "By marriage" comment legally applies in wherever OP lives.

mike3775 35

Thursday 10 May 2018 17:10

Depends on the laws where the person lives. My sister and I had to fight my aunts and uncles over my mom’s stuff because her will had been written before my sister and I were of legal age (18), and they really wanted her stuff.

withered 30

Thursday 10 May 2018 17:39

Maybe there is a reason his wife said/did that? Unless the OP's wife did that for no reason/to be a bitch I would do some self reflection were I in OP's shoes.

mekiswrite 21

Thursday 10 May 2018 20:09

Where I live you are legally obligated to provide for your spouse and children in your will. However, with adequate reason (e.g., I gave my child $10,000.00 in "gift money" during my life and therefore do not leave anything to them upon my death) you can leave spouse/children out. Perhaps OP has money and the wife felt it unnecessary to leave him anything. Though, OP should have been made aware of this a long time ago.

KittyMack 13

Friday 11 May 2018 1:08

Yep totally. YDI if you're calling in sick once a week due to staying up late to play World of Warcraft or online poker, or snort coke. YDI if your temper or other flaws get in the way of a healthy relationship. Or if you have fallen for more than one Nigeria.n prince scam. Ever burgled someone you knew's house. All sorts of things. FYL and my sympathy & outrage if it's unwarranted, maybe her bond with her siblings is cultishly overboard or something. I don't imagine the marriage could survive this though, whatever the meaning is.

Davros 12

Thursday 10 May 2018 16:08

I would have pulled up to the ER and said "well, there you go" and stared at her while I waited for her to get out.

julfunky 29

Thursday 10 May 2018 17:31

What lawyer told her it’s possible to give her daughter away like that?

snowlep 12

Thursday 10 May 2018 23:42

In Oklahoma and plenty of other states females can just pull that because males RARELY get custody rights.

MN_girl21 7

Thursday 10 May 2018 18:19

While what she said wasn’t nice and not something to gloss over, I once had severe abdominal pain and wouldn’t let my husband take me to the ER because I thought they would tell me it was just gas or something. Ended up needing to call 911 while he was at work because I kept passing out and was shaky. Turns out I had a hemorrhaged cyst and lost 2.5 liters of blood internally. So don’t ignore abdominal pain for fear of it being gas..