Embarrassing, Dogs, Awkward and Animals: It's not what you think… - FML

It's not what you think…

By sucks - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Spicy

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserts dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said, "How do you like that?" Then my mom walked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 932

You deserved it 158 996

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Top comments

MURPHYCHACHO 5

Monday 18 May 2009 9:49

What. The. Hell. Are. You. Smoking?

fueledbyamy 0

Monday 18 May 2009 9:51

thats so wrong, but so ******* hilarious at the same time!

Comments

koda_fml 0

Monday 18 May 2009 13:56

Dog > You Lmao.

TattooedToDeath 0

Monday 18 May 2009 14:01

haha nice ;) i lol'd

Meowff 0

Monday 18 May 2009 14:14

IF this was my son, I'd be calling the therapist. You're real smart, dick head. :P Why the heck would you hump your dog back? Now he knows you're interested!

lautner4eva 0

Monday 18 May 2009 14:16

hahahahahahahahahahah ur cray-z! wut next? u guna pee on ur dog? and wtf did ur mom say?

circayouandme 0

Monday 18 May 2009 14:21

You sick ****!!!

alyssamarie218 0

Monday 18 May 2009 14:26

OMG HAHAHAHAH

Rawrrr14 0

Monday 18 May 2009 14:29

lmfao. My dog does the same thing, now humping my dog back crossed my mind..... but I decided against it. lol

BlackJewel 0

Monday 18 May 2009 14:29

haha u made my day :D talking about human dogs, they do exist XD

phluffmuffin 0

Monday 18 May 2009 14:33

This never happened.

lol135 0

Monday 18 May 2009 14:40

you're ******. the end

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Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I told my son to get a job and start paying rent. Five minutes later he transferred me rent for the next 5 years. When I demanded to know where he got that kind of money, he showed me his bank statements. He’s made more money mining Bitcoin than I’ve made in 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 273

You deserved it 1 363

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I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 109

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 364

You deserved it 329

Today, I was eating out at a restaurant with my family. My dad had drained most of our bottle of wine, so thinking he'd be a little less uptight than usual, I reached over to pour myself some. He swatted my hand away and started yelling at me for being a "degenerate drunk". FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 701

You deserved it 6 313

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I agree, your life sucks 240

You deserved it 1 039

Today, I spent thirty minutes on the phone with my best friend's mom, because her daughter was too afraid to tell me that I'm no longer a bridesmaid at her wedding because I'm too fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 732

You deserved it 1 663

Today, after hanging out with my boyfriend’s group once, they’ve decided I’m a “prissy stuck-up bitch who thinks she’s perfect.” I’m not at all. They just engage in nothing but insults and self-deprecating “jokes” without any real conversation. Sorry for not putting myself down for amusement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 821

You deserved it 272

Today, I took cough syrup for a miserable COVID sore throat and harsh cough. It went down the wrong tube, and now I'm coughing worse, trying to get it out of my lungs. It hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 917

You deserved it 158