Make it stop

By Anonymous - 10/01/2016 13:17 - United States - Waldorf

Today, I met my new upstairs neighbors. They have a four-month-old child and appear to be firm believers in the "let them cry it out" philosophy. The baby's room is right above mine. A few days of trying to sleep through this shit and I'll look like a Walking Dead extra. FML
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You deserved it 1 577
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Top comments

stingray112 24

Sounds like you and NyQuil will become great friends. Also might wanna sleep while listening to soft music or something

159 3
cloudyface 23

It's not his responsibility to learn to sleep through someone else's baby constantly crying he's not responsible for anyone else's kid nor should anyone's baby be disturbing him in his own home.

84 9

Comments

Kramer1998 20

They can't help him crying, plus that's what your supposed to do with babies

2 4
IcemistDragon 20

I'd get ear buds. If those don't work I'd record the child crying 1-2 full nights in a row and add that to a noise complaint that I'd be filing.

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ModernaParker 5

Don't be so insensitive. That's what you sign up for living in an apartment.

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Bekll 31

A white noise machine may help. I had horrid upstairs neighbors who let their two year old run around from 8 am to midnight every day for about a year. I was extremely sick/anemic and the stress made it all the much worse. I and their upstairs neighbors complained constantly and finally they were made to move out. I hope you get your situation sorted out much sooner. Good luck, OP.

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olillia 16

"Crying it out" is for total asinine imbeciles. People use the philosophy "well it will teach them to not cry when they want something". No, moron. Babies CANNOT SPEAK. Crying is the ONLY way they can communicate that they need something. They aren't doing it because they're spoiled, selfish, etc etc. They're running on instinct. They cry to alert you of an issue. Countless studies have been done on what happens to their bodies. A child who is made to "cry it out" keeps borderline toxic levels of the neurotransmitter responsible for stress during and even the following days after. They hooked them up to monitors and they've found that when they thought the babies had stopped crying and were finally asleep, they weren't actually asleep. Their brain legitimately thinks that the child has been abandoned and the mother isn't coming back, so it shuts down and only does the bare minimum to conserve energy because it thinks it will die. My mother bore and raised seven children. My sister has bore and raised six. Somehow they managed to not let a single one cry it out, even when they had a million other things going on. And what do you know, everyone was potty trained and bed trained sooner than average and are fiercely independent. I feel as though "cry it out" is for the total dumbasses and the lazy that don't bother to understand that actual, SCIENTIFIC, physical information has proven this method dangerous. It's not an opinion.

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xcllla_ 27

Totally agree. Your mom and sister rocks! Congrats on having such great relatives, no kidding.

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Frungy 9

olillia - Please provide a link to even one of these "numerous" studies, because I'm an actual real, live psychologist who has a very good grounding in neurology and what you've written is completely wrong. See the link to the textbook I provided in one of my other comments. Anyway, please provide the link and I'll read the study and then point out where you've misunderstood, because clearly you have misunderstood or been misinformed.

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dorothy675 15

I've read several other parents' point of view, and have talked to mothers, and at about four months the baby can realize that they can get attention by crying. This is why my mom let me cry for a few nights at that age. It obviously worked and hey, my mom isn't a crazy imbecile moron ;) I realize you might be sympathizing with OP and I don't wanna discredit your mom's parenting skills (because she sounds great), but there are different ways to parent, and there isn't one right way. Also calling people morons is a little childish.

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olillia 16

#98 wow an actual, real life psychologist that doesn't know the effects this has on the child brain and whose username is Frungy. I'll take my chances and call BULLSHIT. And why do I have to Google it when you just as easily can? No wonder you're a supporter of this anti-method, you're lazy. #104 oh you talked to other people with opinions? That's nice. It's nice that they think they know what is happening. But CT scans don't lie. Heart monitors don't lie. Neurotransmitters don't lie. Science doesn't lie. FACTS DO NOT LIE. Opinions lie. Thinking something with no evidence lies. And it's not childish to say someone is a moron. It is ABSOLUTELY moronic to disregard scientific evidence or other new information solely because it doesn't support what you already believe. THAT is childish An article compiled by six psychologists explaining what is happening step-by-step when your child cries it out: http://www.bellybelly.com.au/baby-sleep/cry-it-out/ An article about the history of the method, why it came about because of social reasons, not actual psychology, and how it has been disproven for decades: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/moral-landscapes/201112/dangers-crying-it-out

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luther48 20

So...as a statistician I can tell you that you are wrong. Math doesn't lie. Everything else does. Scientists use statistics which is based off of assumptions and (often) arbitrarily drawn lines (99% confident). Two experts can take the same data and make two equally valid conclusions. That's why our experts differ so much

1 1
CharmeKetsueki 16

Allowing your child to "cry it out" often leads to Developmental Trauma Disorder. Which is when a child's cries aren't answered and the child learns that their needs won't be met since children learn whether the world is safe and if their needs will be met in the first 2 months. If not They grow up with that thought that they aren't safe which leads to intense anxiety issues in the future. (I have developmental trauma disorder)

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KnownAsCAJ 11

Not necessarily, no. Your statement is highly contingent on the assumption that children crying it out are left crying for everything including their basic needs, leading to the formal definition of neglect. The reason very well may be crying over a toy or always having "mum" there even when the other parent is around, but we won't know for sure and can't simply throw around the words "trauma, and PTSD" because of the lack of background information regarding the family and child and the circumstances surrinding when they let their child cry it out . - Psyc. student.

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rldostie 19

This is such a stretch. My mom cried it out with me and I'm fine. A great standing member of society, even. I used this method with my daughter and she's fine. She had no personality changes and is a happy, well-adjusted baby. It's a method that only takes about three days and you still attend to basic needs, like night time feedings and changing diapers. It's mostly just used to get a baby to self sooth when first put down to bed. They learn to fall asleep on their own and not in their parents arms or on the nipple. My daughter has no issues going to sleep, enjoys her crib, and is well loved and attended to. Stop trying to blame your issues on something so external.

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cazza3 15

I can't stand ppl that let their babies cry it out. It's emotional damage that lasts a life time. Research has been done. How would these adults feel if they were ignored for hours when they felt a genuine need for something even if just for companion. We are social creatures, even babies.

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sirrubberduckie 35

"Research has been done." There's plenty of research that says if you've taken care of all of a baby's needs and they simply will not sleep, it's ok to let them cry as long as you continue to monitor them and are certain they're safe. You can find this advice given by highly-respected psychologists, pediatricians, child development experts, etc. Can you point me to a current scientific or other consensus stating that what you're saying is now generally accepted?

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Ethan_Anonymous 28

Possibly why the previous occupants moved out

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soullyfe 33

Doubtful since they weren't living there yet until the previous people left...

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kelizsaiz 4

4 months is too young to try this philosophy. Sadly upstairs neighbors suck ,be it kids, them stomping around like cattle. etc. I swear my last ones river danced nightly.

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sylvienoir 18

Do you actually know for a fact that's what they're doing? The baby could have caullic. Parents can't control when their baby cries. They can try to soothe them, but sometimes it just isn't possible. They can cry for hours. I doubt the parents are really letting their baby cry for hours every night by choice. Get some foamy earplug things and a loud box fan. Sometimes it's just what you have to do.

4 1