Love: Not a morning person

Not a morning person

By crazybitch - 18/06/2012 04:57 - Canada - Okotoks

Today, I learned that when my girlfriend told me that she's a different person without coffee and smokes in the morning, she wasn't kidding; after I'd asked her how she'd slept, she bitched me out for "mocking her" and hurled a hairdryer at my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 010

You deserved it 4 072

Valentine's Day: Love and Maladresse
Discover romantic anecdotes with a touch of awkwardness - because nothing expresses love better than a little discomfort! More…

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Same thing different taste

Shame on you!

By Bjax - 11/10/2017 16:00

Today, my girlfriend woke me up at 5am to tell me she was mad at me. Apparently I did something bad in her dream. She still won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 741

You deserved it 395

Never change the routine

By Anonymous - 18/10/2024 00:00 - Sweden

Today, my girlfriend and I got up, dressed, and dealt with the kids. I had to be somewhere so I poured coffee for her and me and started eating my breakfast. She got offended, refused to drink coffee with me, and has been ignoring me since. She regularly starts eating before I sit down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 437

You deserved it 76

By TwiceDaily,Kids - 06/04/2012 00:41 - United States

Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 944

You deserved it 5 127

By Anonymous - 14/06/2013 21:21 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, my girlfriend got into bed with me and started fooling around. I had a terrible migraine, which she knew, so I asked her to stop because it wasn't helping. She then yelled at me for being "ungrateful" and "selfish", and accused me of secretly being gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 448

You deserved it 7 610

By RomanceFail - 02/04/2015 12:51 - United States - Crestwood

Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 047

You deserved it 3 383

By Anonymous - 20/10/2015 09:44 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I leaned over my sleeping girlfriend, kissed her cheek and told her I love her. She punched me in the ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 829

You deserved it 3 657

Romantic moves

By Anonymous - 11/03/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, I tried to surprise my girlfriend with breakfast in bed. Instead, I spilled hot coffee all over her and the bed. We ended up spending the morning doing laundry instead of cuddling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 714

You deserved it 294

The best part of breaking up…

By Anonymous - 19/10/2009 23:51 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 056

You deserved it 8 846

Great relationship you got there…

By anon - 26/10/2022 00:00

Today, I had to blast music, turn the lights on, and physically drag my 29 year-old girlfriend out of bed to wake her up. All the while, she verbally abused me. This is the only way to wake her up, and if I don't do it, she will sleep through the day and then scream at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 157

You deserved it 514

By cj123 - 23/12/2011 08:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend yelled at me for breathing too much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 511

You deserved it 5 484

catanita 18

Monday 18 June 2012 12:51

So, morning sex is out of the question.

maosquare 18

Monday 18 June 2012 12:49

Well, loads of people can't go without their regular caffeine intake in the morning. I know my hands start trembling if I don't have my hot brew in the morning. It's really bad though.

Comments

bigdipper32 5

Tuesday 19 June 2012 1:48

she's nuts run plus smoking is a disgusting habit.

_wraith 15

Tuesday 19 June 2012 2:30

It also has this really annoying thing where its an addiction, too. Far harder to quit than if it were just a habit. Ultimately, I do agree with 114 - though as a former smoker I understand that its an extremely hard hurdle to overcome. Regardless, she's your girlfriend, and shouldn't be treating you like that, nicotine and caffeine withdraws notwithstanding. Maybe have a sit down and tell her no one likes being treated that way. Good luck OP

Vicy_fml 0

Tuesday 19 June 2012 1:56

Just like my mother....do not attempt conversation til she has had coffee. Say all that must be said during a 3am drunk call, then talk to her after lunch. At least that's what I do....she's gotten used to it though, and thank god lives 2 hours away....

john494 4

Tuesday 19 June 2012 4:25

She's a keeper

COLDB3AR 6

Tuesday 19 June 2012 5:25

This made my day!

fatalwish 6

Tuesday 19 June 2012 7:04

after the hairdryer incident i belive it is time for shienannigans load the hair dryer with flour catch her in the shower and dump cold water over the curtain and various other funny pranks to get her back

Sylvasa 15

Tuesday 19 June 2012 9:21

I don't drink coffee or smoke, but I have a similar problem (and so do my mother and grandmother). Ever since I was a baby, after I wake up (naturally, never wake me up!!) I need to have 30 minutes all to myself. I cannot stand any sounds or anyone talking to me during those 30 minutes, or else I get really, really cranky. Luckily my boyfriend has to leave work right as I wake up, so it isn't so bad for us ;)