Intimacy, Sex and Awkward: Oh Bondage! Up Yours! - FML

Oh Bondage! Up Yours!

By Anonymous - 28/08/2023 06:00 - France - St-Malo

Spicy

Today, and ever since I've known her, my girlfriend easily falls asleep if she lies down. We decided to try bondage on our bed, but once laying down she fell asleep. I was the one tied up to the bed frame. When she woke up, I thought it would be funny to say I could stay two more hours like that. She took it seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 190

You deserved it 546

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Same thing different taste

Let me go!

By ForeSight - 14/08/2019 16:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend wanted to play a game call "bondage bingo," taking turns tying each other up in different positions, and if we can’t escape, we get to take a picture. Whoever gets the most pictures wins. After tying me to a chair, she ended up leaving me there for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 092

You deserved it 624

Bondage prank [GONE SEXUAL]

By ldn - 21/03/2013 17:54 - Slovenia - Domzale

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend confided in me that she wanted to try bondage. Since I trust her, I said sure. After I was tied to the bed, she tickled me until I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 735

You deserved it 12 989

By Anonymous - 03/10/2010 01:34 - United States

Spicy

Today, while I was going down on my girlfriend, she fell asleep. She said she was too tired to fake it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 520

You deserved it 9 572

Narcolepsy

By Isuckreallybad - 06/02/2021 21:30 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep during sex. This isn't the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 909

You deserved it 427

Great idea for a fun night

By Anonymous - 10/08/2023 14:00 - Spain - Salamanca

Spicy

Today, to my surprise, my girlfriend accepted to try bondage, despite not being particularly turned on by it. I understood why when, after she firmly tied me up to the bed, she ate 80% of the two-person cake we bought for dinner. In front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 453

You deserved it 323

By depressed - 22/02/2010 07:23 - United States

Spicy

Today, a girl I have been wanting for years told me she was drunk and needed me to take her home. On the way home she was very frisky and flirty, and I kept telling her to wait till we got to her place. When we finally arrived, she passed out on me and I was stuck there watching her sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 823

You deserved it 26 498

By mee - 30/11/2011 06:43 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try something new. I ended up tied to the bed, and my girlfriend discovered how ticklish I am. Worst 3 hours of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 101

You deserved it 8 832

The wrong kind of banging

By BRELLA - 03/02/2009 19:58 - United States

Spicy

Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with a girl from home who I'd wanted for a long time. She has low blood pressure problems though, and when things got hot, she passed out while she was on top of me, fell and hit her head on the night stand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 111

You deserved it 3 951

Repetitive

By justgreat - 24/03/2012 02:30 - United States - Opa Locka

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while giving me head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 600

You deserved it 6 222

New moves

By Glassjaw - 01/08/2009 07:23 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I had gotten tipsy and found ourselves in the bedroom. We started to fool around and she leaned over to put her watch on the nightstand. I tried to undo her bra, which surprised her, because she elbowed me in the nose so hard that I ended up passing out from the pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 152

You deserved it 8 005

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bigredmonkeybutt 28

Tuesday 29 August 2023 0:17

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Comments

bigredmonkeybutt 28

Tuesday 29 August 2023 0:17

🤣😂🤣

Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, there was a long queue at the store, and behind me were two senior citizens. I wanted to do a good deed, so I said, "Cut before me in line, I have all the time in the world." My reward? The old man scolded me because I supposedly insinuated that they were old, and only had a short time left to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 423

You deserved it 13 444

Today, my jobless husband wants to buy the latest iPhone. His current phone is in good condition, except that he has a 1000 apps on it slowing it down. We're also in deeply crushing debt from all his bad financial decisions from his severely loss-making business. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 170

You deserved it 182

The Top

Today, I paid $70 to learn from the vet that my cat doesn't have a UTI, he's just developed a fetish for peeing on plastic bags. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 535

You deserved it 2 926

Today, I woke to find my boyfriend of 2 years gone. I saw my little sister's talking bear at the bottom of my bed, it said "squeeze me" so I squeezed it and it said "it's over." It was my boyfriends voice. I was dumped by a talking bear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87 216

You deserved it 4 908

Today, I texted a friend saying I urgently needed his help. He gushed back along the lines of, "Glad you reached out, everyone has noticed your terrible frame of mind, you’re a suicide risk." I meant help with a tricky Excel spreadsheet, but thanks for the support I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 654

You deserved it 123

Today, I walked out into my backyard. As I did so, my dogs ran past me, slamming the sliding door off its track. I went to catch it, and knocked the bird cage over. To complete the fumble, as I turned to catch the bird cage, I stepped in a dog turd. I wasn't wearing shoes. We're all okay, but… FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 139

Today, while I was teaching my chickens to eat out of my hand, one of the hens bit my finger and I dropped the entire handful of treats. Result: bonanza for the bird. The rest decided they could get more treats by biting me rather than by behaving. I now have a flock of fingerbiters. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 309

You deserved it 7 432

Today, I realized that I spend more money on gas to go to my job than what I get paid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 425

You deserved it 3 626