Intimacy, Sex and Weird: Oh hell no - FML

Oh hell no

By Anonymous - 27/07/2024 13:00 - United States - Anaheim

Spicy

Today, I was in the "getting to know you" phase of dating a guy I recently met. We were talking about our families and I mentioned my dad died when I was young. He blurted out, “So, we get to have some of that kinky daddy issue sex then, huh?” I’m not sure if he was joking or not but still… FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 90

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Same thing different taste

U wot m8?

By Anonymous - 23/10/2023 11:00 - United Kingdom - Ilminster

Spicy

Today, my now ex-boyfriend said to me, “Who’s your daddy?” during the deed and it was so off-putting, I said my dad's actual name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 498

You deserved it 258

By lextoast - 26/07/2015 18:15 - Rwanda

Today, I went on a fabulous date with a really cute, smart, funny guy. He only mentioned his dad, so when I asked about his mom, I asked if they were divorced. She'd died of breast cancer so I felt awful. Then I asked if his dad had ever remarried. His stepmom had died of cancer too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 797

You deserved it 2 684

Strange kink

By Anonymous - 28/04/2009 00:43 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend when we started messing around. Things were getting really hot when he got a call from his best friend, whose grandfather had just died. As they were talking and I heard her crying, he unzipped his pants and mouthed, "She won't know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 957

You deserved it 7 528

By Oh God - 24/05/2018 06:00

Spicy

Today, I met my new boyfriend’s family for the first time. Unfortunately for me, his dad walked in to ask what we wanted for dinner while we were having sex. Even worse was that my boyfriend kept going while his dad was there, and his dad later said he was glad I was “the woman”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 117

You deserved it 1 453

Freud intensifies

By Anonymous - 08/07/2021 22:01

Spicy

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. An ex? A friend? A side guy? Nope, none of those. I called him “Dad”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 539

You deserved it 1 180

Wild accusation

By Allissa - 13/02/2024 18:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, my husband accused me of having an incestuous relationship with my deceased father, all because we haven’t had sex in months due to my grieving. According to him, no one grieves that hard for someone unless they were in love or fucking them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 138

By quit fucking up my life - 23/11/2013 01:08 - United States - Kenai

Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 653

You deserved it 4 919

Not now!

By XxDiabolikalXx - 24/08/2010 07:30 - France

Spicy

Today, while having dinner, my boyfriend decided to tell everyone about our sex life. It wouldn't have been too bad except my father was sitting right next to me. My boyfriend's excuse was that he wanted to make my dad laugh. He didn't laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 784

You deserved it 4 324

Ahem

By Bucko321 - 30/03/2009 01:18 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 721

You deserved it 78 306

Dad jokes!

By Chels - 11/05/2011 05:17 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 475

You deserved it 5 317

Next

Top comments

thefmlman2011 36

Sunday 28 July 2024 1:04

Run OP. Run far.

copalolita 11

Sunday 28 July 2024 3:24

Misogyny is a dealbreaker. I hope you called him out on it and never speak to him again.

Comments

thefmlman2011 36

Sunday 28 July 2024 1:04

Run OP. Run far.

copalolita 11

Sunday 28 July 2024 3:24

Misogyny is a dealbreaker. I hope you called him out on it and never speak to him again.

TwoBytesCarley 27

Sunday 28 July 2024 15:16

🚩

emmalou 19

Thursday 1 August 2024 7:52

definitely no need to for the get to know this idiot

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The Top

It's great to see you ! How was july ? Hot, sweaty, flirty ? How I miseed talking to you (and getting one or two comments if we're lucky enough). But let's not complain, a whole month welcoming artists for their second rounds who gave us brand new il...

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Today, I came home to find my husband’s disgusting pig of a sister let herself in while we were at work and decided to take a nap in our bed. Not only did she not ask to visit, she left a huge smelly period stain on my favorite sheets. No apology, no attempt to clean up. I didn’t give her a key. FML

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Today, I got on a crowded bus and was forced to stand. The bus made a sharp turn, so I reached for a pole to hold onto. Without looking, I grabbed the pole. It was wet and moist, but I nonetheless held on until the turn was done. I turned to see I had also grabbed a large man's nose and had squeezed it. FML

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You deserved it 890

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I agree, your life sucks 29 977

You deserved it 2 824