Sex, Birthday, TMI, Send nudes and Miscellaneous: Oh no…

Oh no…

By Anonymous - 12/04/2014 01:40 - Canada

Today, it was my birthday. I only got one message, from my dad, which was a sexual image meant for my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 985

You deserved it 3 451

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Happy Birthday baby!

By Anonymous - 06/12/2020 18:02 - Philippines - Quezon City

Today, it's my birthday. My parents wished me a happy one via text message. We live in the same house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 97

Happy birthday anyway!

By bdaygirl - 11/05/2024 10:00 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, I received a short happy birthday message from my father. He’s never been one to show affection, and I haven’t spoken to him in months since he only reaches out to ask for money. This might have given me hope that he cares or wants a relationship with me. Except… it’s not my birthday, and I don’t think he knows that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 104

By Anonymous - 20/11/2010 05:49 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. The only person that remembered was my creepy stalker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 178

You deserved it 3 293

Generic Happy Birthday gif

By Anonymous - 26/06/2021 14:15 - United States

Today, I'm still trying not to cry. Yesterday was by birthday. I got an email from my dad with three words, "Happy Birthday (nickname)". I got a Facebook post from my mother. No card. No phone call. No gift. I have become nothing more than a Facebook friend to my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 642

You deserved it 240

Cool story, tell it again

By GGimabeast - 29/07/2010 04:14 - United States

Today, I celebrated my birthday. My mom invited a bunch of my relatives over, and they started telling funny stories of when I was a kid. My mom decided that then was an appropriate time to talk about how she caught me looking at porn the other night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 444

You deserved it 12 428

By carboncoach - 13/12/2013 17:24 - Egypt

Today, it's my birthday. The only "happy birthday"s I got were from my mom, her Facebook account, and the Facebook account she made for her cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 801

You deserved it 3 405

Close to me

By Furnando - 06/01/2023 00:00

Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 748

You deserved it 1 155

By willieboom - 30/05/2009 15:18 - United States

Today, I turned 30 years-old. My dad, the only living relative I have, gave me a call. Not to wish me a happy birthday, but to tell me about "a hot piece of ass" he nailed at the senior center last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 712

You deserved it 3 057

Life is a roller coaster

By Username - 02/10/2019 14:00

Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 883

You deserved it 176

By Micawber - 31/01/2011 13:55 - Denmark

Today, it was my birthday. I got ONE birthday greeting: from my bank, telling me they were closing my account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 429

You deserved it 3 467

abhi95 31

Saturday 12 April 2014 12:08

HAPPY BIRTHDAY OP.. WE AT FML LOVE YOU.. MAY YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL YEAR AHEAD! There you go.. I bet you're blushing now

thxnder 14

Saturday 12 April 2014 12:08

It's something

Comments

posie97 18

Tuesday 15 April 2014 0:50

SURPRRIIIIIIIIISE!!!!!!!! Oops! Wasn't supposed to say that yet till the cork was popped from that damned champaigne..

Huddisher 10

Tuesday 15 April 2014 13:52

I'll buy you a shrink for your birthday, maybe.

Bcfrmkc816 17

Tuesday 15 April 2014 15:23

Happy birthday. I know how ya feel on my birthday the only card I got was from my primary care doctors office

celestenuss 8

Wednesday 16 April 2014 11:29

Was it in his .. Birthday suit? ;p

ArbitraryJuice 2

Monday 12 May 2014 4:40

The only happy birthday I get is from the creepy hobo across the street

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Neighbours Wanker Lonely Halloween Party Jealousy Love Argument Fight Family Animals Cats Parents Sports Health Embarrassing Shopping Medication Anger issues Birds Weddings Pranks TikTok YouTube Dogs Cute AITA Work

The Top

Today, I had an interview for a college. The college is in Rhode Island. I live on the West coast. When I asked the interviewer if they got to the mainland by boat or by some other form of transportation, he told me Rhode Island is not an island. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 693

You deserved it 65 210

Today, I found my boyfriend browsing tablet PCs on the internet. He actually had a tablet until a while ago, but he hardly ever used it. He still has two smartphones, a desktop PC and a laptop he never uses. But yeah, sure, he needs a tablet. Because, "they're cheap." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 386

You deserved it 276

The Top

Today, I fell asleep while my boyfriend and I were having sex. What's worse is that he didn't even notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 765

You deserved it 15 043

Today, I made myself a smoothie with fruits and wild greens, which tasted much better than it looked, so I licked the splashes off the blender’s lid. Including a stray leaf that didn’t get blended. Which turned out to be stinging nettle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 368

You deserved it 879

Today, my coworker told me I should stop smoking cigarettes because it makes my breath "smell like shit" and makes my teeth look as yellow as corn. I've never smoked a cigarette in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 190

You deserved it 9 019

Today, after a long shift, I came home and cleaned my house so I could relax tomorrow. I finished up the night with a soothing bubble bath, which was lovely until the ceiling collapsed into the tub. I can't even wash the filth off because my bath is full of drain-clogging plaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 883

You deserved it 149

Today, I had to sell over $400 worth of china at a flea market. I barely got paid enough to refill my gas tank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 364

You deserved it 7 898

Today, I met my boyfriend's family. He calls his parents things like “geriatric hag” and “old clown”. I was about to yell at him, but they started calling him “nancy boy” and “nerd”. Apparently they love each other, but only communicate through abuse. I can’t believe I may soon marry into this mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 609

You deserved it 1 264