Sex, Birthday, TMI, Send nudes and Miscellaneous: Oh no…

Oh no…

By Anonymous - 12/04/2014 01:40 - Canada

Today, it was my birthday. I only got one message, from my dad, which was a sexual image meant for my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 985

You deserved it 3 451

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Same thing different taste

Happy Birthday baby!

By Anonymous - 06/12/2020 18:02 - Philippines - Quezon City

Today, it's my birthday. My parents wished me a happy one via text message. We live in the same house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 97

Happy birthday anyway!

By bdaygirl - 11/05/2024 10:00 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, I received a short happy birthday message from my father. He’s never been one to show affection, and I haven’t spoken to him in months since he only reaches out to ask for money. This might have given me hope that he cares or wants a relationship with me. Except… it’s not my birthday, and I don’t think he knows that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 104

By Anonymous - 20/11/2010 05:49 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. The only person that remembered was my creepy stalker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 178

You deserved it 3 293

Generic Happy Birthday gif

By Anonymous - 26/06/2021 14:15 - United States

Today, I'm still trying not to cry. Yesterday was by birthday. I got an email from my dad with three words, "Happy Birthday (nickname)". I got a Facebook post from my mother. No card. No phone call. No gift. I have become nothing more than a Facebook friend to my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 642

You deserved it 240

Cool story, tell it again

By GGimabeast - 29/07/2010 04:14 - United States

Today, I celebrated my birthday. My mom invited a bunch of my relatives over, and they started telling funny stories of when I was a kid. My mom decided that then was an appropriate time to talk about how she caught me looking at porn the other night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 444

You deserved it 12 428

By carboncoach - 13/12/2013 17:24 - Egypt

Today, it's my birthday. The only "happy birthday"s I got were from my mom, her Facebook account, and the Facebook account she made for her cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 801

You deserved it 3 405

Close to me

By Furnando - 06/01/2023 00:00

Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 748

You deserved it 1 155

By willieboom - 30/05/2009 15:18 - United States

Today, I turned 30 years-old. My dad, the only living relative I have, gave me a call. Not to wish me a happy birthday, but to tell me about "a hot piece of ass" he nailed at the senior center last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 712

You deserved it 3 057

Life is a roller coaster

By Username - 02/10/2019 14:00

Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 883

You deserved it 176

By Micawber - 31/01/2011 13:55 - Denmark

Today, it was my birthday. I got ONE birthday greeting: from my bank, telling me they were closing my account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 429

You deserved it 3 467

abhi95 31

Saturday 12 April 2014 12:08

HAPPY BIRTHDAY OP.. WE AT FML LOVE YOU.. MAY YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL YEAR AHEAD! There you go.. I bet you're blushing now

thxnder 14

Saturday 12 April 2014 12:08

It's something

Comments

jaylacheatham 7

Saturday 12 April 2014 17:56

happy birthday! I hope your day was/is swell! may you have a wonderful year ahead of you!

aalliee 4

Saturday 12 April 2014 17:59

Happy birthday! :))

brandoneyez1 25

Saturday 12 April 2014 18:20

Happy Birthday and gross.

flashback_fml 14

Saturday 12 April 2014 19:07

Nah that was meant for you as a birthday present

martin8337 35

Saturday 12 April 2014 19:22

Sounds like some sort of Deliverance/Wrong Turn thing going on here.

martin8337 35

Saturday 12 April 2014 19:27

Hopefully you still had good birthday despite the text.

worldclassrager 39

Saturday 12 April 2014 19:39

I think your dad may need to check who he is sending things to more than once... Happy birthday!

pookiebear1001 13

Saturday 12 April 2014 19:58

Ouch & happy birthday

mavrik4 5

Saturday 12 April 2014 19:59

happy birthday i hope you have a wonderful day

mchmelev1993 10

Saturday 12 April 2014 19:59

Ohhhhhhh . Myyy. God.. Run away and start a new life and pretend this never happened ok its never too late D:

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Neighbours Lonely Halloween Wanker Jealousy Love Party Fight Family Argument Animals Cats Parents Sports Health Embarrassing Shopping Medication Birds Anger issues Weddings Pranks TikTok YouTube Dogs Cute Work AITA

The Top

Today, I recently burned both my hands at work so I had to ask my husband for help changing my tampon, but he refused saying it would make him feel sick. This from the man who routinely sticks his tongue in my asshole when we have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 209

You deserved it 4 811

Stop everything you're doing right now, there's an (almost) naked lady in today's illustration! Plus, there's a puppet AND doctors. It's the perfect illustration, made by Gemma Correll, our British artist of the day. Check out her interview! ...

I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 9

The Top

Today, a thirty-something guy swaggered into my workplace. He was wearing shutter shades and torn jeans, and claimed to be our new boss. I called security to throw him out, at which point he produced his ID and let me know I'd be attending an employee review session next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 910

You deserved it 8 180

Today, I had a concert. At the end, my conductor was recognizing soloists. When he pointed at me, I was confused, but stood up anyway. It turns out he was pointing at the person behind me. I had to awkwardly sit back down in front of over 500 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 869

You deserved it 6 048

Today, my company published "return to work" procedures for when the pandemic stops. HQ is in Maryland, I live in Arizona. I have worked remotely for the last 8 years. My new boss didn't know this. He wants me to move back to Maryland or find another job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 472

You deserved it 115

Today, it's six months until I graduate and I don't have a single skill that can get me placed in any company, but worst part is that I don't even want to work to acquire any skill. I'm fucking useless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 855

Today, the AC broke in the kitchen of the restaurant I work at. Temperatures reached over 100 degrees and one of my coworkers nearly passed out. Our boss accused us of being "dramatic" and only let us step out after I collapsed. I need this job too badly to quit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 054

You deserved it 1 719

Today, according to my wife of 30 years, I'm finally old enough that I look, smell, sound and act like my father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 762

You deserved it 114