Health, Food and Awkward: Ouch

Ouch

By kb123 - 05/05/2019 20:00

Today, I'm visiting my wife's home country for the first time. To avoid the spicy street food, I bought something labelled "Fruit salad" from a street vendor. I didn't know even Pakistani fruit salad can be very spicy too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 944

You deserved it 362

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Same thing different taste

By my bravado's gonna kill me one day - 10/08/2018 13:00

Today, as a big fan of spicy food and a huge challenge seeker, I decided to try the hottest burger I could order. Despite being warned by a waitress, I went for it. After eating a third, I had trouble breathing from the spiciness. The waitress was smirking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 270

You deserved it 3 887

By Anonymous - 14/04/2012 11:10 - Egypt - Cairo

Today, my parents invited my Muslim boyfriend over for dinner for the first time. My mother made sure that everything including the salad had pork in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 564

You deserved it 7 474

Hangry boi

By Anonymous - 11/04/2022 14:00

Today, thanks to my wife’s obsession with expensive foods like chutney, relishes, exotic spices, and preserved foreign vegetables and herbs, I'm literally staring into a fridge full of glass jars, with a door that barely stays closed, and yet has nothing inside suitable to eat for my dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 916

You deserved it 218

By halfie - 26/09/2015 05:06 - United States - Pigeon Forge

Today, while on my first ever date, I ordered a really hot curry, hoping to impress my date. "Yeah," I said smoothly, "not everyone can handle spicy food." When I took a bite, my eyes watered, my mouth burned, and I had to plead for water in between moaning like a dying baboon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 517

You deserved it 33 471

By Coldsnap - 12/08/2011 17:25 - Sweden

Today, my father tricked me into eating a Tasmanian habanero, saying it was just another pepper. The burning in my mouth was unbearable, but nothing compared to when I took a shit later in the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 845

You deserved it 5 014

Bodyscan

By Anonymous - 25/05/2024 13:00 - United Kingdom - Normanton

Today, my mother-in-law had concealed in her suitcase a kitchen knife and plastic bags of MSG, salt, and other seasonings (AKA unidentified white powder) because she doesn’t trust foreign food, and wanted to cook her own food on holiday. Airport security were not amused and we missed our flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 103

Impressive, dude

By Anonymous - 06/02/2023 15:00

Today, I was on a first date at high-end Indian restaurant. I tried to impress my date by ordering the spiciest dish on the menu, only to find out it was way too hot for me to handle. I ruined the entire meal by coughing, choking, and drinking five gallons of water with tears streaming down my face for at least 40 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 138

You deserved it 1 962

Scoville

By Anonymous - 15/06/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend made dinner. He warned me that it was spicy, but I laughed at him and said that white guys don't know spicy. Five minutes later, I had to beg for milk, with my eyes streaming and nose pouring. Turns out I was wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82

You deserved it 712

By DMStarsky - 21/10/2011 17:19 - United States

Today, I ate a bowl of my girlfriend's homemade chili. She went a little heavy on the spices, but I ate it anyway. An hour later, I can now say that if it burns going in, it will explode coming out your rear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 584

You deserved it 4 709

By perfectman - 12/06/2012 10:34 - Australia - Sydney

Today, it was my first time meeting my fiancé's parents. My future mother-in-law had cooked steak, hearing it was my favourite food. I somehow managed to bite my tongue, and then blurt out "Fuck!" just after she asked me how it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 305

You deserved it 8 389

ajh1800 25

Sunday 5 May 2019 20:27

Since your wife is from there, why not just tell her you don't like spicy food and ask her what you'll be able to eat instead of just guessing?

julfunky 29

Sunday 5 May 2019 22:04

If asking what food isn’t spicy is considered imposing then he’s in the wrong relationship.

Comments

ajh1800 25

Sunday 5 May 2019 20:27

Since your wife is from there, why not just tell her you don't like spicy food and ask her what you'll be able to eat instead of just guessing?

Gerardo Gonzalez 1

Sunday 5 May 2019 20:48

he doesnt want to impose on his wife and accidentally make her think he doesnt like her home country

julfunky 29

Sunday 5 May 2019 22:04

If asking what food isn’t spicy is considered imposing then he’s in the wrong relationship.

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 5 May 2019 21:59

And tomorrow, your butthole is going to learn that lesson, too.

bloopaloop 27

Sunday 5 May 2019 22:39

They have great bacon there. It’s not spicy at all!

Shabnam Moghal 14

Monday 6 May 2019 1:47

Hi OP. Pakistani here. Please don't eat anything being made on the streets. Drink only bottled mineral water. Please also talk to your wife about your spicy food problem. She'd probably much rather know about it so she can be careful and help prevent you becoming sick. Have a safe healthy holiday.

kdmittens 9

Monday 6 May 2019 11:17

yes we have a masala for fruits as well.. its called chaat masala :p next time ask them to not put it on your fruit salad although i would strongly advice you to eat home cooked food street food is not good for the stomach of locals as well