Please…

By Anonymous - 08/04/2009 04:34 - United States

Spicy
Today, I was afraid my mother had seen the bottle of hand lotion I'd forgotten to take off the desk after I'd whacked off last night, but she acted fine. I went out with friends to find she'd had changed the background to say "Please Do Not Watch Porn on the Family Computer." FML
I agree, your life sucks 11 110
You deserved it 66 300

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Why is it when people see hand lotion they automatically think of masturbation? I would have played it off as having dry skin.

Comments

ccsballazdre 8

Lol, i've done that a couple of times but played it off as puttin lotion on my arms or legs

... My brother used to do that on the family computer. Finding remnants of his **** everywhere in various curiously named files... ugh. So, YDI, don't ********** on family comps.

RiChY_BaBy08 0

wow, didn't know a posting about jacking off on the family computer can turn into the history and origin of circumcicsion. and i find this funny because i was blamed for downloadin the **** on our family computer when it wasn't me. dude get a laptop!

I was going to stay mum on the circumcision topic, but when somebody brought up Jesus... **** you people are dumb. Don't say Christian America wanting to stop their kids from masturbating is the reason for circumcision- wtf? Circumcision is a Jew/Muslim thing. My sons are going to be circumcised because it's a commandment, not because I'm afraid they'll be getting their jollies by themselves. If you want to act smart, educate yourself.

I keep hand lotion on my computer desk, and it is certainly not for masturbation, its for dry hands. Why would someone automatically assume this?

At least she was nice about it. Unless she was naggy about it later.

Ok, I have researched the topic of circumcision, and not on wikipedia, on actual reliable sites. It actually started WAYYY back, they believed it cured insanity and chronic masturbation. It also is used religiously and to cut back on infections. I personally don't agree with it, but yea thats the facts. Someone said something about cutting girls, well they do. lol, they slit off the clit at the age of 13 in some religions.... for both males and females circumcision is often done without numbing or pain medication. Infact I have a friend who had it done at 15, at home with no pain reliever. He said its excruciatingly painful, afterward you gutta wear a skirt because pants hurt to much.

ohwowthatsucks25 0

yeah uhh, why couldn't you have just been using it for your skin? wtf