Work: Pleased to meet you

Pleased to meet you

By Noname - 16/02/2009 18:23 - United States

Today, I went in for my second day working at my internship. My bosses greeted me and told me we were going to have a meeting. The meeting was about the drunk voicemails I left them on Saturday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 491

You deserved it 76 766

Halloween: Terror and Laughter
Discover stories that combine fright and humor for an unforgettably funny Halloween. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Great planning

By TheBaconater - 03/02/2013 16:22 - United States - Baraboo

Today, I woke up to a voicemail from my manager saying I had the day off. Excited, I made plans with my friends. A few minutes ago I got a call from my other manager yelling at me for not showing up, and the original manager revealed he had me confused with another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 775

You deserved it 2 248

By idontevengetpaid - 05/09/2016 04:35 - Brazil - Rio De Janeiro

Today, I arrived at my internship at 7 am after three hours of sleep with a massive hangover. When I got there, my boss told me he had made a mistake and I was meant to come in next week. He then said, "Well, now that you're here, you might as well get some work done. Come in next week as well." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 148

You deserved it 15 241

By Username - 18/02/2011 09:33

Today, at work, my phone rang. My intern answered it and told me it was a coworker who'd just left. I picked up and said "What's up bitch? What are you going to complain about now?!" It was actually my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 018

You deserved it 44 928

By Anonymous - 26/10/2010 00:22 - United States

Today, I went to my first day of work in over 2 years. As I approached the boss, he asked me what my name was. Turned out they hired the wrong person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 646

You deserved it 2 379

Nice to know

By Sarah - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boss mistakenly drunk-texted me and was talking shit about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 182

You deserved it 1 800

By Anonymous - 02/09/2009 09:39 - New Zealand

Today, my boss rang me for the 5th time on my day off. Frustrated I pushed 'ignore' and yelled a string of obscenities at my phone. Turns out I pushed 'talk'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 564

You deserved it 50 934

By embarrassed much - 27/02/2016 03:14 - United States - Orlando

Today, I was talking to my new boss while on speakerphone. Then, my sister yelled for me, asking me to check whether she had a yeast infection or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 400

You deserved it 2 649

What she said

By Anonymous - 05/03/2022 10:00

Today, I unknowingly left a five minute-long voicemail on my boss’s phone, at 3 a.m., while out drinking with friends. I have no idea what we were talking about at that time, but I know I don’t want my boss to have a candid recording of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 530

You deserved it 534

By iswearicandrive - 17/12/2010 05:14 - United States

Today, I hit my boss's car. It's only my second day on the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 276

You deserved it 10 290

You wish!

By Anonymous - 22/04/2012 02:22 - United States

Today, on my first day of a new factory job, I discovered that my new boss had lied to me about my hours. I found this out when my coworkers burst out laughing when I mentioned having the weekends off, and talking about my recreational plans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 816

You deserved it 2 480

Amkii 0

Monday 16 February 2009 20:07

I love it!

joojoo_fml 0

Monday 16 February 2009 21:35

a coworker of mine did the same. boss man was totally cool about it and laughing.

Comments

Amkii 0

Monday 16 February 2009 20:07

I love it!

pimrol 16

Tuesday 13 May 2014 8:11

i don't care!

fadingintodust 0

Monday 16 February 2009 20:32

thats ******* epic dude!

YooHoo_817 0

Monday 16 February 2009 20:36

I have a feeling they kept him . Those bosses didn't sound like prudes lol .

joojoo_fml 0

Monday 16 February 2009 21:35

a coworker of mine did the same. boss man was totally cool about it and laughing.

bobdole 0

Monday 16 February 2009 22:42

i don't get how/why you would drunk dial your work or boss?

22cute 17

Wednesday 6 June 2012 5:29

Because she's a drunk.

moig_fml 0

Monday 16 February 2009 23:04

im with #12. either way its hilarious. especially if they kept you

Seegtease 0

Tuesday 17 February 2009 0:42

Your fault, but totally hilarious.

8ranko 0

Tuesday 17 February 2009 22:49

you deserved that and you're surely F*****

torch433 1

Wednesday 23 May 2012 1:59

r u to afraid to cuss or wht idiot -___-

alwaysalady 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 22:39

You're dumb. On all accounts. If they did keep you, you don't deserve it.

tweetylover8402 0

Thursday 19 February 2009 19:29

LOLOLOLOLOLOL That is SO full of Fail!

Keywords

Neighbours Miscellaneous Awkward Lonely Wanker Halloween Jealousy Love Party Fight Family Argument Cats Animals Parents Health Embarrassing Sports Shopping Medication Birds Anger issues Weddings YouTube TikTok Pranks Dogs Cute AITA Work

The Top

Today, I got my husband a really expensive Bulova watch. He asked for brown. I got him a brown and gold leather watch. He said it looked to much like the cheap $10 watch in his collection and asked if I could exchange it. I can’t - no refunds. Now we are fighting because he can’t express his feelings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 118

Today, I was verbally abused by a customer at my job. Apparently, wearing "ugly, thick-framed hipster glasses as a fashion statement is a HUGE faux pas." These are my actual prescription glasses, and "faux pas" is not pronounced "fox paws". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 732

You deserved it 3 724

The Top

Today, after talking to my psychiatrist about a delusion I have - that I know is a delusion but simply can’t shake - he started frowning and pulled out the DSM-V. After thumbing through it for a while he looks at me and says, “That’s not in here.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 192

You deserved it 189

Today, I received a $250 ticket when I parked my car, that has the disabled placard, in a handicapped spot at a Wal-Mart. The officer said she watched me get out of the car and walk to store without appearing to be disabled. I'm 59 years old, have a steel rod in my spine and a prosthetic hip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 302

You deserved it 3 349

Today, after eating out, my mother asked me to figure out 20 percent of the bill whilst staring daggers at me. I have never been good at math under pressure and especially not percentages, so I told her as such. She called me a complete idiot, to which my father simply said, “I agree.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 299

You deserved it 398

Today, I realized how sex-deprived I am when the thought of owning condoms gave me a rock-solid erection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 559

You deserved it 634

Today, my husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for a year, with no success. My husband's unemployable brother and (still legally married to another man) fiancée announced they are expecting. They have 7 kids between the two of them already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 964

You deserved it 137

Today, I had a job interview; unfortunately for me, I was so nervous that all of a sudden I felt the need to take a huge dump. My bowels started growling out of protest. I tried to play it off as if it was due to me being hungry, but it sounded like I had a monster trapped in my guts. The interviewer raised an eyebrow in disbelief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 706

You deserved it 112