Parenting, Awkward and Porn: Punished - FML

Punished

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Spicy

Today, my mother walked in on me watching porn. As punishment, she sat down and made me watch the rest of it with her as she gave play-by-play commentary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 371

You deserved it 23 047

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

Vintage_Cola 29

Friday 6 March 2015 14:05

Your mother is ******* awesome XD

Welshite 39

Friday 6 March 2015 14:08

"And now the male inserts his penis repeatedly into the female. The female makes sounds indicating pleasure. Now both partners have achieved their climax."

Comments

Candied_person 13

Tuesday 10 March 2015 0:26

U should have kept going she would then leave

unique_freak 17

Tuesday 10 March 2015 10:23

Thats getting into a very strange game of incest porno chicken... Cause it's all good if she leaves... But if she doesn't, you are now committed to jerking it while your mom commentates your porno... If that isn't about the worlds fastest boner killer I literally think that you should seek metal assistance.

Nickythehippy 6

Tuesday 10 March 2015 1:15

Haha hahaha awkward!! Now what have you learnt?! :P

rabid_otaku 29

Tuesday 10 March 2015 3:17

Your mom sounds like the most badass parent ever.

SPFINATOR1993 10

Tuesday 10 March 2015 8:43

Your mother deserves a ******* medal.

Tripitaka 21

Tuesday 10 March 2015 11:10

parenting done... how?

Eleora 19

Tuesday 10 March 2015 16:56

"You see, your father and I did this differently... No, no, no! They're doing it all wrong..."

hamerzeiter 1

Saturday 14 March 2015 9:03

Isn't this how most pornos start?

DWmomoftwo 18

Sunday 22 March 2015 5:36

Awesome parenting!

Abadmonster 16

Monday 23 March 2015 17:06

Parenting done right

toyhenoctus 16

Friday 27 March 2015 20:17

Not gonna lie but that sounds f**king hilarious! Now I'm trying to picture my devout Christian mother doing the same thing and I can't because I'm cracking up too hard

15
16
17
18
19
20

Keywords

Miscellaneous TV shows Coworkers Work Awkward Politics Ironic Embarrassing Relatable Transportation Social Media Instagram Shopping Parenting Jealousy Love AITA Am I overreacting? Kids Dogs Friends Pranks Housework Cars Porn Technology Health Sports Accident Mental health

The Top

Today, my girl was giving me a BJ when my dog started howling. She keeps going; my dog keeps howling. She stops, my dog stops. We start getting it on again and my girl starts giving me a BJ again; my dog starts howling louder this time. So we stop. My dog stopped me from getting some. This is a first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 123

You deserved it 244

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 535

You deserved it 10 056

The Top

Today, I saw the girl I have a crush on holding hands and making out with another girl. When I hinted that I was into girls, in an attempt to ask her out out two months ago, she told me she was “straight as hell” and would “never resort to that disgusting ass lesbo shit.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 270

You deserved it 258

Today, I met my boyfriend's sophisticated grandparents. I politely introduced myself. The first words to come out of his granny's mouth were, "If something happens to him, you won't get a f*cking cent of the insurance money, you hear?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 692

You deserved it 3 149

Today, I returned from a week long vacation in Aruba. After 10 hours of travel and 3 flights, I was walking to my car at the airport, excited to finally get home, only to realize I left my car keys, apartment keys, and work keys at the resort. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 709

You deserved it 5 142

Today, I went out to eat with some friends. They picked a table that wasn't big enough for all of us. I had to sit in the booth behind them. Alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 428

You deserved it 4 743

Today, I attended my first meeting with my bosses. For lunch we went to a restaurant. I choked on a piece of meat and couldn't breathe anymore. I had to take that piece of meat out of my throat with my fingers, and then put it back on my plate all chewed up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 032

You deserved it 3 482

Today, and every time I try to talk to my mother about being a lesbian, she just says in the most condescending way, "Oh no you're not sweetie, it’s just a phase." The "phase" has lasted 17 years, including marrying my wife and adopting twin sons, but sure, it’s “just a phase.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 745

You deserved it 244