Awkward, ACAB, Cops and Transportation: Rough - FML

Rough

By aarone23 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 301

You deserved it 4 151

New Year, New Blunders
Celebrate the New Year with stories of resolutions broken in less than 24 hours and memorable New Year's Eves... for all the wrong reasons! More…

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Same thing different taste

Roaming gangs

By 23yearoldtoddler - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was jumped and savagely beaten to the ground by a group of six-year-olds wearing Disney princess masks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 012

You deserved it 6 781

Suspect

By Anonymous - 01/08/2009 04:30 - United States

Today, I went for a run. I ended up being tackled by two cops, handcuffed, and dragged to the station with no explanation. Turns out a house nearby had been robbed and the best description they got was, "A man running." I didn't even get an apology. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 403

You deserved it 2 849

There's no justice

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my car got keyed because I was parked in a handicapped parking spot. I'm handicapped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 878

You deserved it 2 626

I'm OK!

By MAC. - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto

Today, I slammed the car door on my head while I was getting in the car. If that wasn't bad enough, my boyfriend is convinced I now have a concussion and insists on waking me up every hour to make sure I'm still alive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 449

You deserved it 6 042

By singlesoon - 25/08/2009 04:26 - Canada

Today, I bailed my soon to be ex-husband out of jail after he'd been arrested for soliciting. Soliciting an undercover cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 739

You deserved it 7 152

Rewind time

By supersmashpika - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Hershey

Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 670

You deserved it 9 996

Renegade

By Anonymous - 23/04/2023 06:00

Today, my man got arrested for starting a fistfight with a cashier who wouldn't let him smuggle out groceries without paying. It gets worse; two weeks ago he got arrested mugging a guy at a gas station, and he's still on bail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 1 230

No good deed…

By williebees - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Huntsville

Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 921

You deserved it 2 522

Help yourself

By anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Westwood

Today, I witnessed a car accident. Being an experienced paramedic, I rushed to the scene to see if anyone needed help. As I assessed the people involved, one of them pickpocketed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 215

You deserved it 2 153

It's sus to us

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - New Orleans

Today, I got lost, and eventually noticed that I'd passed by the same house a few times. Apparently somebody who lives on that street noticed as well, because the next time I passed by, the police were waiting for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 436

You deserved it 4 496

Next

Top comments

Imagirll 3

Wednesday 1 June 2011 19:09

show them your drivers license..

ckyorelse 18

Wednesday 1 June 2011 19:13

Hi! Billy Mays here with the all new Magic Age Reducer! born in 1979? Let's try 1992! With the all new Magic Age Reducer, you can get out of any warrant thrown your way!

Comments

TessaFaye 0

Friday 3 June 2011 23:53

hahaha how freaking old do you look??

jude907 0

Saturday 4 June 2011 0:49

**** The Police.

michelle2s 0

Saturday 4 June 2011 7:58

just saying...I was born in 79 and for 32 i look damn good. so even if you were 8 when you committed said crime, you could still look.....nah....who am I kidding. that's awful!

nivekcizia123 0

Saturday 4 June 2011 15:27

hmm can anybody corroborate that alibi?

Dcmachead 0

Saturday 4 June 2011 16:01

congratulations! you have won the lottery!

baseballbeast12 0

Saturday 4 June 2011 16:54

That sucks!! Like what some people said, cops are dumb and retarded!

Mr_Plague 8

Saturday 4 June 2011 23:17

Calyx is dumb.

FLASHOOM 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 7:22

You must've been one badass sperm/egg cell

rjflores 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 7:42

time travel?

ellymac411 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:58

dangg

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Keywords

Animals Gross Poopoo peepee Cats Love Awkward Smells Miscellaneous Embarrassing Health Painful First Dates Christmas Work Music Grieving Social Media Anniversary Boredom Intimacy Abuse Ironic Alcohol AITA Transportation Drunk Am I overreacting? Gun control Kids Parents

The Top

Today, I got home and found my girlfriend in bed with another guy. After the screaming, yelling, and kicking them both out of my house, all I wanted was whiskey. I found the bottle under the bed. It wasn’t enough the guy was porking my girlfriend, he had to drink my booze too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 539

You deserved it 112

Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. because my throat was swelling up. I called 911 and they determined that I would live, so I took two Benadryl and slept all day. Then I went to urgent care for my scheduled appointment time and tested positive for Covid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 858

You deserved it 215

The Top

Today, my demented mother-in-law had my dog euthanized while I was on vacation, because he was, "too feral and disorderly." Why? Because he, "peed on the grass." I had that dog for 9 years. Why couldn’t my husband put her in a nursing home instead? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 562

You deserved it 102

Today, I realized cigarettes are my cure for boredom. I bore myself out of $2000-plus a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 844

You deserved it 1 899

Today, I had to endure a long story about how and why my brother shaves his pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 755

You deserved it 4 862

Today, my husband was arrested because a fox, fleeing from about a billion dogs and rich twats on horses, jumped through our car window, and cowered between my legs. He got out of the car, waded through the dogs, and pulled one of the twats off his horse into a puddle, ruining his red coat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 765

You deserved it 258

Today, I gave my mother a pre-prepared deposit envelope with my fortnightly wage in it, in cash. I tell her exactly where the deposit box is and what to do. I'm now desperately calling the bank because my mother accidentely put my $1200 deposit in the little trash can for receipts under the ATM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 946

You deserved it 13 938

Today, I had to get my picture taken for a volunteer badge at the hospital. My sister came home and told my parents that she'd had a horrible day at work. They showed her my picture to cheer her up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 794

You deserved it 161