Sex and Intimacy: Say it, don't spray it - FML

Say it, don't spray it

By nr1234 - 24/05/2011 04:27 - United States

Spicy

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend gets a nose bleed every time he orgasms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 377

You deserved it 4 497

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Same thing different taste

Nosebleed

By bloody good time - 23/11/2019 05:00

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and he slid his hand up near my face too fast and ended up clocking me in the nose. It is the first time that I have ever had nosebleed while orgasming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 195

You deserved it 253

By anon - 08/12/2012 05:33 - United States

Spicy

Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 469

You deserved it 5 444

Raise the pressure

By Anonymous - 14/05/2022 18:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. He got on top and started kissing my ear when a warm liquid went down my neck. My boyfriend had a gushing nosebleed, which went threw the pillowcase and the pillow. I got cockblocked by a nosebleed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 103

You deserved it 173

Sharing is caring

By Anonymous - 11/08/2021 00:01

Today, I was making out with this guy when my nose started bleeding, and it got on his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 99

By Anonymous - 21/08/2014 21:24 - Portugal - Alg

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 807

You deserved it 6 736

By Anonymous - 06/01/2011 06:03 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on. My boyfriend noticed that every time I'm about to climax, I hit my head on something. Whether it's a wall or his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 480

You deserved it 6 148

By Anonymous - 30/05/2013 03:55 - United States - Redlands

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate on the bathroom floor. Somehow my nose managed to start bleeding, so he bent me over the tub and kept going because he didn't want to "ruin the moment". FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 770

You deserved it 9 824

Romance isn't dead

By broken - 13/09/2009 04:26 - United States

Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 001

You deserved it 4 478

By Username - 22/02/2010 05:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 105

You deserved it 3 325

By anonymous - 19/03/2011 10:32 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I found out that when I orgasm, my increased heart rate causes me to pass out. I also found out my boyfriend doesn't stop when I'm unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 282

You deserved it 8 527

Next

Top comments

PsychoXtheXrapis 3

Tuesday 24 May 2011 12:10

Hey, at least he doesn't have an ****** every time he gets a bloody nose.

ambowew 7

Tuesday 24 May 2011 11:53

You're dating Jiraiya?! That's so perverted, shame on you!

Comments

Nerdwithbooks 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 6:08

hahaha what is this a manga?

chaoticnh 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 10:39

just to mess with the doctor if you go. while he's out of the room blow your bf and have him lay back after you are done. it look like he's dead lol xD

iluvanimegurl 0

Monday 30 May 2011 22:12

lol sounds like something a perverted anime guy woul do XD

axama 0

Monday 30 May 2011 23:37

#160 exactly what i was thinking! xD

Daviddwd 0

Tuesday 31 May 2011 14:09

bone]r

Daviddwd 0

Tuesday 31 May 2011 14:12

god damn it my sister hacked my phone and antiflood.

nicky99 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 0:41

I thought girls have orgasms and men ejaculate

bewbies 3

Friday 3 June 2011 4:43

did she lick papa smurfs ass?

ambermary101 6

Thursday 9 June 2011 1:50

At least you know he's not faking it.

roxy59_fml 0

Tuesday 14 June 2011 6:35

wtf haha

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Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, it's been two months since I broke up with my boyfriend. He's been texting me every time he found a bobby pin at his house that belonged to me, saying we should both see it as a sign of us belonging together. If he keeps this up every time he finds one, the texts will probably never stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 096

You deserved it 880

Today, I got into an argument with my boyfriend, who recently had to move away, about not calling me enough. Apparently his moving had meant that we were now taking a break, he just forgot to talk it over with me. He still wants to visit, and keep the relationship in bed alive though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 670

You deserved it 4 364

The Top

Today, a child that was born due to my donation to a sperm bank in 1995 contacted me. My current wife, who I met in 2003, is convinced I cheated on her and is filing for a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 698

You deserved it 544

Today, I found out there's nothing like getting dumped and then receiving an inadvertent Snapchat sext from your ex-girlfriend that was intended for her new boyfriend, on what would have been your anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 588

You deserved it 150

Today, the girl I've been dating for two weeks brought up the topic of marriage, then started asking me when we're moving in together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 117

You deserved it 6 894

Today, I was running late for work and threw on the first pair of pants I could find. Halfway through the day, I realized the pants didn’t have pockets, but it was too late. I had to carry my phone, keys, wallet, and coffee mug in my hands like some sort of deranged juggler every time I moved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 97

You deserved it 377

Today, as usual, I got home to find that my roommate had eaten all my groceries and left a mess behind for me to clean. To be fair, this time she did some cleaning - she "energy cleansed" my room with a sage wand, burning a huge hole in my mattress in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 107

You deserved it 154

Today, I was walking around town with the girl I have loved for four years and have been 100% faithful to. A girl thought it would be funny to approach me and pretend she was the girl I was seeing, and that I was cheating on her. My girlfriend believed her and broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83 868

You deserved it 4 613