Parenting, AITA and Kids: Sentenced - FML

Sentenced

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Orlando

Today, I realized I can't wait until my daughter moves out the house when she is 18. She's eight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 256

You deserved it 29 294

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By makdra - 06/01/2016 18:01

Today, I found out my mom can't wait until I turn 18, so she can kick me out and turn my room into a huge closet for all her clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 262

You deserved it 2 033

By heartless - 11/03/2010 21:07 - United States

Today, my mom told me she can't wait for me to turn eighteen so she can turn my room into a place for her to display all her antique glass dolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 567

You deserved it 2 519

By Amber C - 07/04/2012 03:41 - United States

Today, I realized my daughter has been in longer relationships than I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 978

You deserved it 22 955

A news day

By Not Wanted - 03/02/2014 08:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I'm moving out of the house. My little sister can't wait and I've never seen my dad so happy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 917

You deserved it 4 683

By CollegeBound - 17/08/2012 19:55 - United States - Tully

Today, at age eighteen, I finished moving out of my parents' house and into my own. The only person to even remotely give a shit was my sister, and that was only because I was taking the cat with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 261

You deserved it 2 367

Now I ain't saying she a gold digger...

By Anonymous - 26/09/2017 19:34

Today, I was forced to sit silently through my 20-year-old daughter's wedding to a man who is 8 years older than I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 831

You deserved it 451

Long time coming

By Anonymous - 19/11/2023 00:00

Today, our youngest child finally moved out of our house. I went to embrace my wife and say something romantic about us growing old together, but she said, "Thank God they're gone, I can finally leave you." An hour later, she was gone too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 035

You deserved it 166

By myheart75 - 07/08/2011 09:52 - Australia

Today, my niece told me to go and find my own friends. She's 2, and I'm 18. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 528

You deserved it 5 878

My boy

By NeverEscaping - 03/02/2013 00:52 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I decided at age 18 that it's time to put into storage the picture books that have been collecting dust in my room for nearly a decade. My mother took this as a sign that I'm planning to move out and abandon her forever, and has been crying for the last four hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 072

You deserved it 2 927

By independant - 08/11/2018 08:30 - United States - Corvallis

Today, my son turned 18. He now calls me by my first name instead of "dad" and refuses to stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 747

You deserved it 565

Next

Top comments

Ambient25 24

Thursday 17 October 2013 12:07

Calm down, she's just 8. Once she does move out you'll probably wish she was back. Let's hope she doesn't see her about this FML when she IS 18.

WellImScrewed124 6

Thursday 17 October 2013 12:08

Cherish the moments you have with her when she gets older she could want nothing to do with you

Comments

porcelainvains 8

Friday 18 October 2013 3:17

I mean oh my gosh, you raised her so it must be your fault she is an annoyance? Love and cherish.the fruit of your ovaries.

SillyHumans 2

Friday 18 October 2013 3:35

You must have been a teenage mom hahaha suffer

llnursingll 10

Friday 18 October 2013 3:40

I have two girls 7 & 8 and they are my everything. I hate the fact that they are growing up :'( I don't understand this. More explanation is needed. Does your daughter have her father present in her life and is she daddy's little girl? Do you actually envy your daughter?

maigan332 14

Friday 18 October 2013 3:40

Wow I can never imagine feeling that way about my kids...

jsc9306 14

Friday 18 October 2013 3:54

You need to take parenting or anger management classes... Yikes!

KayleeFrye 39

Friday 18 October 2013 3:59

You do realize that fewer people move out at 18 now, right? So unless you're cruel enough to kick her out, I wouldn't count on it!

pwnman 33

Friday 18 October 2013 4:25

Trust me, you don't like her now, but you sure will in 10 years.

davincidasecond 24

Friday 18 October 2013 4:43

With a parent that says something like that, I wouldn't be surprised if she was counting down the days herself.

Tallywa13 6

Friday 18 October 2013 4:51

Heartless bitch wtf some people can't even have children!

Anditsgone 5

Friday 18 October 2013 5:07

If you think so... I would say the life of you daughter sucks not yours... you deserve it

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Relatable Embarrassing Awkward Health Love Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Work Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight Public freakouts Drugs Neighbours Cops Medication Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic

The Top

Today, my father had a dream that he'd lost me forever, and the pain was so unbearable, it woke him up. Turns out, the pain he was experiencing was just his bowels and he really needed to take a shit. This is the most affection I've ever received from my father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 031

You deserved it 3 461

Today, thinking no one was home, I decided to be a little frisky with my boyfriend. I guess I was being loud and woke up my sleeping autistic brother the room over. Halfway through, he burst through the door, panicking. He thought I was having another one of my asthma attacks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 979

You deserved it 9 781

The Top

Today, my family threw me my 21st birthday party. My grandma's gift turned out to be a pack of condoms. "Not that you'll ever get to use them," she said, turning and walking off, cackling maniacally. Now I remember why I never talk to the old crone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 086

You deserved it 4 088

Today, my brother-in-law wanted a boxing match, which was the last thing I wanted since he’s a trained boxer. The last thing I expected was to knock him out cold on my first swing. My wife is now mad at me because he’s sulking, and I “could have held back to be a good sport.” Um, what? FML

I agree, your life sucks 642

You deserved it 84

Today, I woke up and called my boyfriend. We had amazing phone sex, even better because no one was home and we didn't have to be quiet. Afterwards, I walk out into the kitchen. My mum hadn't gone to work that morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 007

You deserved it 57 585

Today, the CEO of my company leaned over and said, "Hey, I've been meaning to thank you…" I thought he was going to thank me for all of my hard work, but he continued, "…for wearing that shirt today. I can totally see your boobs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 234

You deserved it 7 067

Today, while talking to one of my parents' friends, we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his first tooth there, the only response I could come up with was, "Oh my gosh, I lost my virginity there!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 701

You deserved it 45 059

Today, I was on the phone with my best guy friend, who I have loved for years. I was talking about school and all of a sudden he said, "I love you." I flipped out saying, "Oh my god, oh my god. I love you too!" He responded with, "What?" He was talking to his mom, who was walking out the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 184

You deserved it 17 573