Stoooooop!

By emancipate my ass - 24/07/2016 04:02

Spicy
Today, I had to listen from the next room as my dad cheated on his girlfriend with his married boss. He's 57, looks like a troll, and doesn't smell much better than one either. Meanwhile I'm 24 and couldn't get laid, much less get a date, if my life depended on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks 16 772
You deserved it 1 624
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Top comments

stayydomii 21

OP you gotta get your confidence up. People find it sexy. As for your dad, hopefully karma comes for him soon...

216 5

Comments

Lalala579121 27

212 degrees Fahrenheit makes my blood boil.

36 2
v4valour 15

"Baby, it didn't mean anything.... You gotta believe me!" was the line i used. . . . . . my cat gets REALLY jealous when I pet others.

2 0
bornpatriot 11

Considering the kind words you use to describe your father, an ungrateful **** like you deserves every bit of it. You're 24 and still living with your father. I suggest you work up to get your own place before thinking of getting laid.

2 8
Mightyrif 23

The answer to that riddle? Confidence, my boy.

35 2
stayydomii 21

OP you gotta get your confidence up. People find it sexy. As for your dad, hopefully karma comes for him soon...

216 5
strudelman 14

This is always the advice, but I'm afraid it's really not that useful. "Confidence" is far more a personal characteristic than it is something you can consciously choose. Indeed, knowing the importance of confidence, and also that you don't possess it, can result in further insecurity.

27 4
DanishPeach 8

Fake it till you make it. It is possible - but hard - to increase your confidence.

12 0
rain_in_the_Sky 3

you'd be surprised how right 62 is, it will change the way you think dramatically.

9 0
AmericanBadAss 21

Don't you dare "rat him out" to ANYONE, OP. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY likes or respects a rat. And ☝️this person ☝should know that!

0 3
captain_hero89 22

well at least your dad is getting a raise, which means a higher allowance for you. hopefully you still get allowance

5 43
mhersh_59 8

His dad probably is getting a raise, but not the thing you're thinking of.

16 1
Vitani_Verci 24

Your dad is scum, and the women he's cheating on his girlfriend with are equally scum. I'd rather be a decent human being than have sex. Don't worry OP, someone will come along for you.

85 3
nightingale21 7

They're scum if they know.

15 3
ImAFaker 29

I'd rather be a decent human being then* have sex

16 30
riahlum 12

"His married boss" even if they didnt theyre cheating too

13 0
Beeboopbeep 9

#28 I was about to say you were a failed abortion of two grammar Nazis.

3 8
littlekellilee 45

Maybe 28 actually means it like that. First he'd like to be a human being, then he'd like to have sex.

21 0
taterrtots 25

hahaha 28 if you're gonna take the time to correct someone's grammar on the Internet, and least be right about it. jeez

1 3
Earl_KarmasBitch 34

#28 made a joke that no one seems to have understood. Rather than be a decent human being with no sex, they want to be a decent human being and then have sex. #28 didn't correct the grammar so much as make a play on words over then/than.

8 2
HollyQuinn 21

F his girlfriend's life too. Chin up OP, it'll happen for you!

18 1
Zebediabolical 39

"Meanwhile I'm 24 and couldn't get laid, much less get a date..." If you want sex without a date, find a pro. But personally I find meaningless sex, well.... meaningless.

42 7
sirrubberduckie 35

You don't need to find a pro to have sex without a date.

2 6
Zebediabolical 39

"Meanwhile I'm 24 and couldn't get laid, much less get a date, if my life depended on it." Yes. Some people can get sex without dates. But based on OP's post, OP isn't one of them.

9 1
Tripartita 44

You're 24, OP. Why is your username "emancipate my ass"?

61 1
never_three 21

Maybe they've had their account since before they turned 18, it's plausible with how long the sites been out

0 9
Tripartita 44

I said username, but FML also has nicknames. Usernames cannot contain spaces and are permanent, but nicknames can and are customizable when you write a new FML. Regardless of username, the OP chose the nickname "emancipate my ass" while submitting this story as a 24-year old.

13 1
never_three 21

Then maybe they're referring to the fact that they're still living at home at 24? Why does it matter so much

3 7
Tripartita 44

I never said it did matter; I just thought it was an odd choice of phrase. Then you responded. Twice.

8 0
BobbieH 19

It matters because he is 24. No emancipation necessary, just get a job and get out. There's no reason why he has to stay at home at 24 if he doesn't want to. It's up to OP to make his way in the world, starting with not living with his dad if he doesn't want to live with him.

6 2