Money: Thanks, I hate it!

Thanks, I hate it!

By JacksWag4 - 16/08/2013 22:21 - United States - Romulus

Today, I attended the reading of my grandfather's last will and testament. My parents, as well as my brothers and sister, all inherited a nice sum of money. I got 69 cents, because, "young Jack always was an immature little shit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 490

You deserved it 21 607

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Same thing different taste

By grandson of a p.o.s. - 14/03/2013 22:04 - United States - Somers

Today, I attended the reading of my grandfather's will. I didn't expect to receive anything, since his side of the family had always ostracized me for being born out of wedlock. I did get something: $3,500, on the binding condition that I use a portion of it to get a vasectomy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 154

You deserved it 2 979

Epic prank bro

By Rachel - 20/07/2012 05:13 - United States

Today, I found out my late grandfather left me a significant amount of money in his will. I thought it was weird because he always acted like he hated me. When I got the envelope, there was $500,000 inside, all in Monopoly money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 943

You deserved it 3 585

By TSampson - 11/06/2009 11:51 - United States

Today, my mom's will was read to the rest of the family. I helped my mom write it a couple years ago, and I was to get funds to pay off school loans. She revised it and put in a note saying I was to get nothing because I was "lazy." The executor read it out loud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110 117

You deserved it 11 313

Embarrassment

By Anonymous - 06/01/2013 21:35 - Sweden - Staffanstorp

Today, at the reading of my mother's last will and testament, I found out that despite having cared for her for the final years of her life, she denied me an inheritance. She basically said I'm an embarrassment, because when she wrote it, I was 31 years-old, with no wife or children. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 299

You deserved it 2 398

The golden child

By Anonymous - 25/07/2022 12:00

Today, at lunch with my mother, she disclosed that she made some changes to her will. Instead of the previous even split to all siblings, 90% of the sizable estate will now go to my brother. He has already been living off my mother's property for the last 10 years, and reaping the benefits of being expense free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 998

You deserved it 133

Where there's a will…

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Warwick

Today, my grandpa told my mom that he needs to rewrite his will soon. I jokingly said that I was going to be stinking rich when he passes away. He retorted that he's never forgiven me for rear-ending his car six years ago, and because of this, I'll never see a penny of his money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 428

You deserved it 34 671

By BenjiFurImmer - 12/06/2019 00:07

Today, I found out that when my uncle died, he left me and the rest of my family £2000 each. Only my parents kept and spent my share on themselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 397

You deserved it 138

By Anonymous - 22/06/2014 20:06 - United Kingdom - Basingstoke

Today, I was at the reading of my grandma's will. Apparently I was removed from it some time ago, and the £2,500 I would have gotten went to my cheating bitch of an ex-fiancée. It seems my grandma adored her, and never forgave me for "driving her away" from the family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 146

You deserved it 5 235

Vultures circling overhead

By Anonymous - 07/08/2023 16:00

Today, I inherited several buttloads of money from my grandmother, including property, and by gosh did so many relatives appear from the woodwork to remind me of money granny owed them, or how they just needed an investment to kickstart their business venture. The whole lot of them can screw off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 207

You deserved it 138

Free money for me, but not for thee

By Anonymous - 04/08/2020 14:01

Today, my dad refuses to let me inherit all of his money, which might just put a roof over my head when I’m older. *His* money? Well, actually, he inherited it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 232

You deserved it 934

pistachiopanda 19

Saturday 17 August 2013 5:28

Didn't leave you with jack shit...

georgeee97 9

Saturday 17 August 2013 5:27

Dang man that sucks. Maybe you shoulda been nicer too your old grandpa :/

Comments

Slawter16 24

Saturday 17 August 2013 13:25

I like his sense of humour. That sucks though, OP, but I hope you managed not to laugh out loud when they read 69...

King_paradox 22

Saturday 17 August 2013 13:29

Always bring a pen, and a copy presigned

Valle79 5

Saturday 17 August 2013 13:33

Well, maybe now you'll stop being an immature little shit?

goliatron 9

Saturday 17 August 2013 15:12

You must be one, with "swag" in your username!

olpally 32

Saturday 17 August 2013 15:26

He's dead, you're alive. I think you win this one anyways.

heyheynow 12

Saturday 17 August 2013 16:57

haha im going to leave $1 to be split evenly amongst my family and give the rest to my cat.

xJebu 8

Saturday 17 August 2013 17:45

Irony!

HeartOfLead 24

Saturday 17 August 2013 18:26

"All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy." You were just enjoying your youth and being able to mess around.

dencti 4

Saturday 17 August 2013 19:07

Ahem - that's CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow...

Flashman9000 9

Saturday 17 August 2013 19:34

Have you tried not being a little shit?

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I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 16

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I agree, your life sucks 14 435

You deserved it 46 510

The Top

Today, I took my daughter to the zoo. I threw a piece of my sandwich towards a very cute chimpanzee. As a thank you, he threw a piece of crap at me, which exploded all over my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 321

You deserved it 49 589

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I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 1 187

Today, I was caught on a hot mic during a work department meeting complaining about someone using a leaf blower, F-bombs and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 236

You deserved it 867

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I agree, your life sucks 1 384

You deserved it 284

Today, my dog pooped. In my lap. While I was driving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 877

You deserved it 2 302

Today, I injured my knee during dance class. When it started to feel a little bit better, I tried dancing again. I tripped, fell, and broke my wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 672

You deserved it 5 912