Awkward, Cooking and Intimacy: The medium is the message

The medium is the message

By adam - 15/02/2010 02:16 - United States

Today, I made heart-shaped cookies for my girlfriend. My mom's reaction? "They look like dicks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 136

You deserved it 4 223

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Same thing different taste

By CryoSpectre - 11/05/2015 04:23 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I made my mom cookies for Mother's Day. My brother took all the cookies to work as a snack, because I didn't specifically tell him that the homemade "MOM" hearts weren't meant for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 880

You deserved it 2 346

By FMAhole - 12/02/2019 12:18 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, while at the office, a surprise Valentine's gift arrived for me, the first I've ever received. It was a box of heart-shaped cookies. From my mother. I'm 39. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 737

You deserved it 4 140

By yummy(: - 31/10/2010 02:14 - United States

Today, my boyfriend, who is a great cook, decided to try his hand at baking. The cookies he made looked weird but tasted good. I jokingly said, "They taste great, but they look awful!" He responded by saying, "I could say the same thing about you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 919

You deserved it 27 410

By IwishIwashigh - 01/03/2017 14:00

Today, I went to make cookies, the box said mix by hand so I literally used my hands. Not a fork or anything. My step-mom walked in and laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 523

You deserved it 7 356

By lisahb - 19/06/2012 22:16 - United States - Detroit

Today, my mom took me to dinner. She told me about an argument that she and her boyfriend had, and she showed me the texts. While reading, I learned that she smells his dick before sucking it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 487

You deserved it 3 316

By wakinginvegas87 - 05/09/2010 15:49 - United States

Today, it was my boyfriend's parents' anniversary so I thought I'd do something to impress them. I made them chocolate-covered strawberries. But for some reason they gave me really dirty looks when they saw it. Turns out his mother is allergic to strawberries and his father is allergic to chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 762

You deserved it 5 318

By RawrSparkle - 21/09/2012 07:31 - United States - Davis

Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 127

You deserved it 14 370

By Anonymous - 09/05/2011 04:37 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to give his mother a box of chocolates and flowers for Mother's Day. She just stared at them and said, "What's this for? You're not my daughter, and never will be. But I'll keep the chocolate." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 895

You deserved it 6 316

By shinee - 15/08/2010 16:05 - Singapore

Today, to be nice, I baked cookies for my step-mom as a birthday present. I burnt my hand while putting them in the oven, but I'd hoped it would be worth it. When she got home, I gave one for her to try. She took a bite, spit it out, and threw it on the floor, asking if it was a joke or if I was really trying to poison her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 403

You deserved it 3 631

By Jumja - 15/01/2010 11:37 - Netherlands

Today, I found out my boyfriend's mother has invented a new kind of cake and named it after me: not because it's delicious, but because of the amount of fat in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 212

You deserved it 5 713

Laurendorcus 0

Monday 15 February 2010 9:40

Okay, so you are not a professional cookie shaper, but its the thought that counts and thats really sweet of you. maybe it'll help remind your gf that although hearts are great, you're hoping she'll concentrate on your d*ck tonight. :-)

null_fml 11

Monday 15 February 2010 9:42

Tell your girlfriend "I made them shaped like something you'd recognize," with a noticeable wink, and see which shape she thinks it is!

Comments

lickmyjock 0

Monday 15 February 2010 9:48

Well why don't you feed them to her?

Icarus_II 0

Monday 15 February 2010 9:50

Hearts? How could a heart resemble a shlong? a)moms on drugs b)moms a huge pervert and has passed the torch c)all of the above

Cristaderzi 0

Monday 15 February 2010 9:51

I used too work in a queer district and kid you not they made Penis Cookies!

redneck907 0

Monday 15 February 2010 9:53

dude work on your shapes than

puedominican 0

Monday 15 February 2010 9:56

try a heart shaped cookie cutter next time.. lmao

puedominican 0

Monday 15 February 2010 9:58

haha ;]

PsychoMerk 0

Monday 15 February 2010 10:01

You sure those cookies didn't have some gay subliminal message behind them? ;0

MrVictor_fml 0

Monday 15 February 2010 10:02

why would you set them down shaped like that?... the 2 are very noticeably different unless you're mom has seen penis thats possibly curvey at the bottom or even pointy. you're mom is probably starting to stir things up in the kitchen a little with you if she randomly says that. maybe you're dad was about ready to pop out from a cabnet once thier planned worked to spice up their sex life.