They're everywhere!

By facepalm - 22/07/2013 20:19 - United States

Today, my dad's conspiracy theory obsession hit a new level of stupidity when he blurted, "False flag" because our toaster stopped working. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 258
You deserved it 3 125
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Top comments

misspulkadot24 17

Well, if the toaster doesn't work, then we don't eat as much bread, which will somehow prevent obesity, which will stop the lawsuits and American stigma. You're dad isn't crazy, he knows the truth!!

132 13
xlord 27

Poor America. They are like the popular kid that everyone hung out with only because he had a pool and the latest game consoles but now that his parents are broke everyone bullies him.

119 7

Comments

UnluckyGenius 21

This toaster will now self destruct.

22 2
Cazz91 21

Your comment fits so well with your profile picture. Lol.

6 5
Welshite 39

Well, I suppose I shall be one of the few to live since I don't like bread. Join me...

4 3
salazara 10

Just call Homer Simpson - I'm pretty sure he has the answer to why your toaster malfunctioned! lol

3 17
ILoveMyArm 15

Am I the only one who doesn't understand all these Homer Simpson references?

25 1
Shadomasta 5

By all means, if your first Homer reference bombs, try another one.

0 0
awkward611 26

I don't get this at all guess it's just me...

7 27
CoffeeChickBlows 13

So instead of googling or just moving on to the next one, you just HAD to post a comment telling everyone that you're stupid, and lowering my faith in humanity's collective IQ level. Nice. Thanks for that.

21 28
RoboCunnilingus 23

That was harsh as ****. There is no need to berate her for not knowing something. Whether you're right or wrong is irrelevant, you wasted time insulting her, when you could have just been a decent ******* human being and told her what it was.

39 15
CoffeeChickBlows 13

Woah woah woah, you're misunderstanding me. I wasn't calling her stupid for not knowing, I was calling her stupid for choosing to whine instead of educating herself! It's pretty simple to do really since we're all using the biggest repository of human knowledge out there: the internet. I hate people that expect everyone to spoon feed them stuff that they can just look up themselves. Stupid people are the only reason I even comment. To me it's a community service, and that's never a waste of time.

17 23
malheartsnutmeg 20

If you're on your phone it can be a pain to google something. Instead of telling her the answer, you complained about an irrelevant post with an irrelevant post. You tell the person to educate themselves while berating them for asking a question. Next time, don't be a jerk and just answer their question instead of complaining about irrelevant posts with an irrelevant post.

10 6
Kukua 5

To be fair, she didn't ask a question. At least that would be an attempt at educating herself. What she did was comment that she didn't get it, but "oh well". She was making a point of saying that she didn't know, and she wasn't going to try to find out. That's what he was commenting on.

1 0
cynthieee__ 8

What can I say? Mans got to have his toaster strudels.

12 1
Pstraka6 20

There muat be much more complexity to a toaster than I originally thought. So what happens when the oven is exactly set to 400 degrees...

4 0
JasonUMN 15

It's a government conspiracy to move the population away from toaster strudels and onto pop tarts!

9 1
CharresBarkrey 15

I toast pop tarts too... Am I the only one that does that??

6 1
misspulkadot24 17

No way! They are not as magical and melty-in-the-middle without being toasted! I freeze them too. But for some reason, I feel like I will be alone in that one.

2 1
monnanon 13

i was under the impression you had to toast them lol

2 2
Latino_Nino 10

Can you please hit him in the head with the toaster? Maybe that'll knock some sense into him

1 2
ApacheC424 18

No, but it could fix the toaster.

7 0
Ins0mau 20

That's what they WANT you to do. ;-)

1 0
T0xiiK23 5

shhh... We can't let the toasters know we're on to them!!

3 0