Intimacy, TMI and Miscellaneous: TMI - FML

TMI

By Disgusted - 05/07/2009 06:30 - United States

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. I also found out from her husband that she has her nipples and nether regions pierced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 022

You deserved it 3 797

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By oliverP123 - 22/07/2011 04:11 - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom and her friends comparing the differences in their nipples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 452

You deserved it 4 233

Ouchies

By pierced. - 25/06/2014 04:29 - United States - Reno

Today, I went to a seamstress to be fitted for my wedding dress and left with a pierced nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 887

You deserved it 6 127

By thanksmom - 20/07/2010 00:23 - United States

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 792

You deserved it 4 108

Body modification

By Anonymous - 22/04/2022 14:00

Today, I got a nipple piercing. My girlfriend thought I was pranking her with a fake piercing, because I wouldn’t be "daft enough" to get a real one, and she yanked it off, or rather through, my nipple. Yes, it cut my poor nip in half, and I now have two nipples where once I had only one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 089

You deserved it 360

By Anonymous - 14/01/2011 20:53 - United States

Today, while playing with my cat, she decided to give me a surprise nipple piercing with her claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 253

You deserved it 5 275

By UHM - 06/10/2013 21:54 - United States

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 276

You deserved it 4 018

Disapproving

By Disappointment - 26/05/2017 19:00 - United States - Gresham

Today, I flew home to visit my parents. We haven't seen each other in two years, I've gotten a few tattoos done since, and I knew they wouldn't approve, so I bought whole new outfits that covered everything and looked professional. When I got there, the first thing my mom says to me is, "Is that a nose ring!?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 239

You deserved it 2 019

By leahrb - 24/02/2016 18:55 - United States - Wilmington

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Son, I want you to suck upon my nipples of knowledge." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 347

You deserved it 1 890

By triplenipple - 10/01/2011 20:35 - Sweden

Today, I realized the birthmark I have on my chest isn't a birthmark at all; it's a third nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 828

You deserved it 4 557

Breaking

By Meghan - 05/09/2020 08:01 - United States - New York

Today, my mom told me that she had great news: we were going to meet my biological parents. I didn't know I was adopted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 742

You deserved it 103

Next

Top comments

diet_otaku 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 16:08

this site really needs a "what's the big deal?" button.

zabeth_fml 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 16:29

OMG NOT PIERCINGS NOOOOO! ...Seriously. So what?

Comments

FarSide 22

Sunday 5 July 2009 20:34

...and your point is????

Kman09 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 20:46

Dude why? just why?

didi666_fml 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 21:08

I dont get it?

jmeg_fml 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 21:20

Your mom's cool.

Books4Me 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 21:20

Um....so? I have never seriously thought the site needed a 'so what?' button before seeing this FML.

lesb_lv 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 21:37

Why do u care, which parts of HER body she had pierced? Shes your mother not your wife to be! If I were u my 1st question should be why in a hell did she gave me up, not speaking with her current partner about piercerd body parts....

Andreas2402 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 21:54

Didn't you ask how many piercings she got?

kaly_fml 1

Sunday 5 July 2009 22:00

....and? What are you, 10? "Ewwww, my mommy has a piercing down there!!"

hotjavalava 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 22:02

I hope she doesnt work a night job...Yeah, my mom works at the local penthouse.

eli_guerra 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 22:06

How is it snobish if somebody is grossed out by the fact that their biological mom they finally met has piercings on her boobs and coochie? Thats TMI but it'd be worse if u walked in on them or this was the parent that raised you instead.

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Awkward Friends Love Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable Work Cars You're fired Parenting Kids Family DIY Cats Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Poopoo peepee Management Frustration Capitalism Coworkers Transportation ADHD Dogs Animals Dating Mental health Health

The Top

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 551

You deserved it 49 634

Today, my boss is going nuts after some coworkers quit, as they were some of the lucky few with enough cash to move away ahead of whatever dumbass plan the next administration has for their immigrant families and friends. My boss is complaining he can't afford to pay "normal people wages" and wants me to work overtime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 449

You deserved it 171

The Top

Today, while hurrying by bike to an appointment, my chain broke. I quickly got off the road and managed to fix it on the sidewalk, covering my hands in black smear. Dirty but confident about my repair skills, I got up. A second later, felt something warm running down my neck. Bird poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 928

You deserved it 130

Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 257

You deserved it 5 688

Today, everyone was telling me a girl I like wanted me to ask her on a date. I approached her, and asked if it was true. She said yes, but only because she wanted to reject me in person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 687

You deserved it 2 543

Today, when I woke up, I thought I’d be sexy by waking my girlfriend with oral sex. Still half asleep, she said, “Robert, stop it that tickles.” My name is Linda, we’re a lesbian couple who've never expressed interest in men, so who the fuck is Robert? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 822

You deserved it 493

Today, for my girlfriend's birthday, I got her an external hard drive and my grandmother's engagement ring. When she opened both boxes, I took her hand and looked deep in her eyes and told her to pick whichever she wanted. She took the external hard drive, even though she already has one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 741

You deserved it 14 600

Today, I called my aunt to wish her a happy birthday. My mom and I proceeded to sing "Happy Birthday" to her. The first words that came out of her mouth were, "You guys are terrible singers." You're welcome, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 366

You deserved it 171