Miscellaneous: Today, a drunk man wearing a sandwich-board proclaiming that,...

By Notasinner - 24/05/2012 22:39 - United Kingdom - London

Today, a drunk man wearing a sandwich-board proclaiming that, "The end is nigh" threw some so-called holy water at me while bellowing, "It's what Jesus would've wanted" and that I should "repent for being an evil shite." FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 855

You deserved it 2 195

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Same thing different taste

By wallet? GONE - 21/04/2013 22:27 - United States - Pueblo

Today, I was mugged by a street preacher. The same one who'd earlier in the day screamed at me for being an evil sinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 695

You deserved it 3 822

By mel_bear_ - 14/03/2012 14:38 - United Kingdom

Today, it was my wedding day. Midway through the ceremony, my visibly drunk uncle stood up and denounced the minister for "preaching yer god shite where it weren't never be welcome". FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 328

You deserved it 2 596

By Anonymous - 08/10/2009 21:26 - United Kingdom

Today, while driving home from work an old homeless man stepped out on front of my car. As I slammed on the brakes the man threw a bag of poo at my windscreen and shouted "Praise The Lord!" before carrying on as if nothing had happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 692

You deserved it 3 448

Book him!

By Anonymous - 14/10/2010 13:42 - Reserved

Today, there were reports of a drunk and disorderly male, and I arrived at the scene only to discover a drunk guy having explosive diarrhoea in a photo booth. He turned to me and shouted "God save the Queen!" It's then that I remembered it was my job to do something about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 764

You deserved it 3 517

Get the hell out of there

By Anonymous - 01/09/2022 22:00

Today, my friend and I were driving to work, when she asked me to stop at the gas station. Ten minutes later, I see this woman come out, my friend right behind her. The woman spotted me, an intense look in her eyes. She marched over, threw a paper at me, and screamed, "Jesus died for our sins!" She then stormed off. I'm a crazy magnet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 889

You deserved it 123

By sbutler - 14/07/2011 20:14 - United States

Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 447

You deserved it 51 280

By NotBeingPaidEnough - 03/03/2016 13:17 - United Kingdom - London

Today, a crazy homeless guy got angry because I wouldn't sell him a bottle of vodka at half price. He got so irrationally mad, he put his fingers down his throat, and threw up on my checkout counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 457

You deserved it 1 323

By Anonymous - 26/10/2012 12:24 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, I went out of my way to avoid street preachers thrusting hateful propaganda at me. A young woman ran up to me and started waving paper in my face, and I snapped at her to fuck off. Right afterwards I realised she was returning something that fell out of my pocket. She looked terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 132

You deserved it 35 292

By Dude - 19/08/2009 10:32 - United States

Today, at WalMart, I saw a guy taping a sign that read "Hide and seek world champs!" over the lost children board. I chased him out of the store, then came back to take it down. As I was trying to remove the sign, a huge crowd began cursing at me and threatening me. They thought I'd made the sign. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 660

You deserved it 5 036

By never thought I'd say that - 22/08/2013 19:05 - Norway - Stavanger

Today, I was the victim of a drive-by pissing by some drunken loon on a segway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 728

You deserved it 2 848

ICastillo 24

Friday 25 May 2012 9:09

"The power of Christ compels you bitch"

Meowingtons500 18

Friday 25 May 2012 9:13

Look mommy! That man is giving free showers. Oh sweet Jesus! Honey, walk faster.

Comments

peace_love_shit 7

Friday 1 June 2012 8:31

you deserved it for being an evil shite YDI :)

crazy4uboi 6

Saturday 6 October 2012 15:33

The end is nigh? What?

TheFlamingTiger 9

Saturday 9 November 2013 16:33

Being a Catholic, I can only hope this man is from the Westboro Baptist Church.

JesusOfNazareth 16

Monday 9 June 2014 5:07

Maybe I did, maybe I didn't.

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The Top

Today, I went out to dinner with my boyfriend and his mom. The hostess asked if I needed "the kid's menu," remarked how I look "so grown up for your age," and asked what grade I was in. I said I'm in university. She laughed as if it was the best joke ever told. I'm 22. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 772

You deserved it 2 046

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I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 18

The Top

Today, whilst in the break room at work, a girl I don’t know walked into the room. She gave me a look of utter disgust, then turned and walked back out of the room. I was so shocked, I burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 750

You deserved it 91

Today, I went to see my grandfather in hospital, to see how well he's recovering from his stroke. He asked who I was. After I told him I'm his grand-daughter, his head almost rolled off his neck in disappointment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 357

You deserved it 2 289

Today, I got married. I was so nervous right before I said my vows that, in the dead silence, I farted. Loud. My brother showed me afterwards, on tape, over and over and over again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 316

You deserved it 7 438

Today, I realized I'm pregnant by a man who won't even accept my Facebook friend request. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 105

You deserved it 20 420

Today, I had someone place two separate to-go orders, so that he could use two of his "25% off" coupons. He couldn't understand why it wasn't 50% off his total bill, no matter how many times I plainly explained it to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 904

You deserved it 129

Today, my mother called me a bad son for not telling her "Happy Mother's Day". When I told her Mother's Day wasn't until the 10th, she said that I would have forgotten anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 836

You deserved it 3 062

Same thing different taste

Book him!

Get the hell out of there

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