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To the people saying she should have told her friend: What was she supposed to say? "Meet my new boyfriend.This is John." "Oh hey I had sex with this guy 20 years ago. Long time no see, John!" sounds just as silly as "Hey can I talk to you for a moment? I just wanted to tell you that two decades ago I had sex with this guy you're seeing right now."
But I've been in this situation and I told my friend... it was awkward but she was glad I told her and it made it a lot less uncomfortable for me and him when. we would all hang out
Good friend but didn't tell her something I'd consider pretty substantial. How did this not come up when they were first dating?
Ok for those who can’t/don’t read: OP slept with NOW ‘besties’ hubby 12 years /BEFORE/ ‘bestist’ and now hubby even /KNEW/ each other.....so wtf would OP bring that up?!?!
OP, she’s mad because she must be the jealous type and the fact you know what her husband looks like and feels like in bed it pisses her off. Give it time she might need to come to her senses and realize that y’all didn’t hook up while they were together. Petty shit like this is why women suck!
To top it off. OP had the newer model of the husband too.
A quick read through the comments seems to imply that the only way to prevent this is for couples to undergo a full discloser of who they've previously slept with when they become serious/exclusive. I mean, seriously, this happened years before the two met (let alone dated), how many people ask their partners to tell them about previous dates, especially from so long ago?
omg people. she said 12 years BEFORE her and her husband met. not that they've been together for 12 years. smh
I personally would have been pissed because my personal policy is to not date dudes that are still friends with past flings. It was always too much of a chore with the women still thinking they owned him or that they should hold a significant place in his life or should be more important to him bc they knew him longer, etc, etc. Also, depending on how she found out, she might feel betrayed. Like, he could have brought up in a fight or she could have found some memorabilia or something. You never know.
Basically you are taking the cowards way out. "It's simply easier to ban my man from talking to other girls than it is to work hard enough to make sure he chooses me as the most important girl in his life". Grow up, functioning relationships take effort, not ultimatums.
Keywords
Didn't she break the girl code for dating someone you slept with? Throw it in her face op
I mean...did you never mention it the entire time they were dating/got married? I'd be pretty pissed if you deliberately hid something like that from me, too.