Transportation: Today, a hobo threw up on my car while at a red light. He then... - FML

By Anonymous - 18/02/2012 06:22 - United States

Today, a hobo threw up on my car while at a red light. He then asked me for money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 058

You deserved it 2 457

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Same thing different taste

By pinkrazrgirl247 - 03/07/2009 06:29 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 437

You deserved it 52 215

By Sarah - 12/06/2012 16:59 - United States - Pipersville

Today, a hobo shook me down for money on the street. He's my brother, who incidentally ran away from home over two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 874

You deserved it 2 810

By Anonymous - 05/11/2009 17:28 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that if you walk up to a hobo by your car pooping, they will chase you yelling, "Get out of my bathroom!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 829

You deserved it 4 205

By Anonymous - 13/11/2012 11:34 - United States - Macungie

Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 993

You deserved it 4 347

By carson28 - 17/12/2010 02:23 - United States

Today, I saw a homeless man on the corner, I thought I would be generous and give him some cash. I rolled down my window and waved my hand for him to come over. As he was walking over, he was struck by another car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 225

You deserved it 6 352

By hobosarea-holes - 14/08/2010 23:10 - United States

Today, I picked up a penny off the street for good luck on my job interview. A few seconds later, a hobo beat me up, took my wallet, and ran off. The whole ordeal made me late for the interview. So much for good luck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 296

You deserved it 3 776

By Anonymous - 28/06/2012 21:20 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, a homeless man asked me for money in a train station bathroom. When I told him I had no money he left. He then returned only to pour a bottle full of urine on my head while I was in the stall. I use a metro card. I honestly had no money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 801

You deserved it 2 175

By Anonymous - 08/10/2009 21:26 - United Kingdom

Today, while driving home from work an old homeless man stepped out on front of my car. As I slammed on the brakes the man threw a bag of poo at my windscreen and shouted "Praise The Lord!" before carrying on as if nothing had happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 692

You deserved it 3 448

By Jehovah God - 07/03/2014 18:51 - United States - Richmond

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 379

You deserved it 3 614

Thanks dude!

By Megan - 11/07/2023 12:00

Today, my car broke down at a red light. A man pulled up next to me and yelled at me to get out of the fast lane. I thought he was gonna offer help, as I was a young woman on her own, but he just yelled at me and sped off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 687

You deserved it 231

Next

Top comments

ollie179 21

Saturday 18 February 2012 12:05

BLARGH! Spare change sir?

iamray 2

Saturday 18 February 2012 12:02

seems like a fair trade to me.

Comments

bcpelle 2

Saturday 18 February 2012 19:58

Your life sucks but this one just made me laugh haha

clutz123 5

Saturday 18 February 2012 20:04

hey, he's in a much worse situation than you.

bizarre_ftw 21

Saturday 18 February 2012 20:13

Offer him -$50 then hold out your hand and say "pay up"

Groucho_fml 5

Monday 20 February 2012 11:12

Sooo clever omg

Breezy4sheezy 2

Saturday 18 February 2012 21:04

He threw up on the car so that he could clean the windows for the money he was asking for.

aliciab394 5

Saturday 18 February 2012 21:44

Why thank you sir for that fine vomit. I think I shall be able to spare $200 dollars for you liquor addiction.

BitchFuckOff1223 7

Saturday 18 February 2012 21:48

Yikess thats horrible. i would have been pissed off but id givem a dollar lmao

crazyblackchick 0

Saturday 18 February 2012 21:50

Pay the man! He cleaned your car......with vomit. At least it wasn't coming out the other end. Or maybe your car is such an eye sore, that he threw up and demanded to be paid for such a horrid image that--he will forever have nightmares about.

HaraAishi 8

Sunday 19 February 2012 6:14

Honestly, I'd rather have the shit. Vomit is so much worse.

MigraineurOfLife 15

Saturday 18 February 2012 23:15

Hate to think what he would do on your car next if he didn't get the $$$!

AntiLove187 4

Saturday 18 February 2012 23:20

Did you run him over after that?? Jk, dude thats jacked up.

johnmleech 7

Saturday 18 February 2012 23:41

Well... Did you give him money?

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The Top

Today, at work, I'm supervising one person. Recently there's been tension between her and a couple of other coworkers, one of which was her friend. I spent the day running around and trying to smooth things over, just to find out what started this was her walking in on her former friend talking about her behind her back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 96

Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said, "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him every day now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 531

You deserved it 32 700

The Top

Life is just one giant storm sometimes!

I agree, your life sucks 482

You deserved it 126

Today, I asked my boyfriend to ravish me. He told me he would rather play PS3. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 271

You deserved it 6 918

Today, I biked to the lake. And by "to" I mean "into". With my phone in my jacket and my laptop in my backpack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 067

You deserved it 4 673

Today, I was at my only sister's wedding. She gave a speech about the person who means the most to her. She said, "She's my favorite sister, who has always been there for me." Being her only sister, I got up to hug her. Turns out she was talking about her slutty sorority sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 421

You deserved it 4 017

Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His mother, seconds upon meeting me, gave me a hug, smiled at me, and said: "It's so nice to finally meet you! All I ever hear is 'Emma this', and 'Emma that', 'I love Emma!'. He never stops talking about you!" My name's not Emma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 685

You deserved it 223

Today, there was a long queue at the store, and behind me were two senior citizens. I wanted to do a good deed, so I said, "Cut before me in line, I have all the time in the world." My reward? The old man scolded me because I supposedly insinuated that they were old, and only had a short time left to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 423

You deserved it 13 444