Transportation: Today, a homeless guy tried to light my hair on fire with a match... - FML

By burningman - 22/01/2015 10:40 - Germany - Darmstadt

Today, a homeless guy tried to light my hair on fire with a match at the bus stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 976

You deserved it 2 683

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

You OK dude?

By Anonymous - 28/03/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I walked out to the parking lot and caught a homeless man laying a fat steamer on the hood of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 71

By Anonymous - 29/12/2010 07:03 - United States

Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 722

You deserved it 4 349

Close but no cigar

By Anonymous - 23/12/2015 23:26

Today, while lighting a cigar, I set my beard on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 607

You deserved it 15 134

By ILiveWithMorons - 12/04/2011 03:07 - United States

Today, my dad set my hair on fire while cooking. He then tried to convince me that it spontaneously combusted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 395

You deserved it 3 344

By kaycie_lynn - 19/02/2010 01:11 - United States

Today, I chuckled at a "No Smoking" sign as I lit my cigarette. I bent my head down to light it and somehow managed to light my hair on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 770

You deserved it 71 617

By meh beard - 18/01/2016 23:42 - Canada - Bowmanville

Today, my roommate thought it was a good idea to set my beard on fire to wake me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 532

You deserved it 1 599

By nimrod23 - 18/10/2009 09:28 - Australia

Today, as I was walking home late at night, some asshole threw a lit cigarette butt out of their balcony. It fell between my glasses and my eye and left a burn mark on my cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 064

You deserved it 2 534

By RingofFire - 03/06/2016 23:23 - United States - Edenville

Today, I was standing on the patio when one of my upstairs neighbors threw a cigarette butt over the balcony. It landed on my head and burned some of my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 295

You deserved it 1 750

This is lit

By a genius - 12/02/2009 13:28 - United States

Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 909

You deserved it 60 289

By chinousmc - 06/12/2012 11:30 - United States - Clearwater

Today, I got punched in the face after a stranger asked for a light, didn't realize it was a butane lighter and burnt the tip of his nose lighting his cigarette. Now my nose looks worse than his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 865

You deserved it 3 422

Next

Top comments

randomguy76 14

Friday 23 January 2015 0:56

He just wanted some warmth and was being resourceful. Don't be so selfish OP, you should have offered up your hair to him anyway.

King_paradox 22

Friday 23 January 2015 0:53

Taking saying "you're on fire" to the next level

Comments

Killz268 18

Friday 23 January 2015 1:13

I bet he was gonna try and smoke it

LeavenSilva 27

Friday 23 January 2015 1:31

I'm really hoping that 'tried' was the key word, and he didn't actually set your hair on fire

GrinchFu1 27

Friday 23 January 2015 1:56

That's what you get for having a house? I've been attacked by homeless people multiple times in my life, and it was never for any real reason. Gotta keep your head on a swivel. Glad you didn't burn to death!

XxXBadAshXxX 27

Friday 23 January 2015 2:15

Maybe he just wanted to add to your hotness

peggscott 14

Friday 23 January 2015 2:37

He doesn't seem like a very bright spark...

iSaidPluh 2

Friday 23 January 2015 2:51

was probly his last match

ProfessorMctitie 20

Friday 23 January 2015 2:52

I dont want to live on this planet anymore

lndala 15

Friday 23 January 2015 16:56

So which planet that can sustain life as successfully as Earth do you plan to live on?

megan_login 6

Friday 23 January 2015 22:12

so unique

vikky538 28

Friday 23 January 2015 4:42

was there any reason he did not like your hair...in any case that's crazy...if he wants to get warm he has has set the fire with paper or wood...not with hair...

Gorebabee17 10

Friday 23 January 2015 4:46

smelly huh?

salamancer 11

Friday 23 January 2015 4:59

Sorry, but I couldn't help but laugh at that. FYL

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Today, my brother showed my wife a Craigslist ad by someone seeking casual sex. It had very specific details that made it seem like I wrote it. My brother later admitted in private that he made the post as revenge for me not loaning him $500 last month. Meanwhile, my wife still thinks I'm unfaithful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 646

You deserved it 1 159

If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 22

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Today, I went to a coffee shop to meet an online date. I couldn't spot him, so he eventually came up and introduced himself. It seems his on-line picture must have been taken before I was born. I spluttered "This isn't going to work," and promptly scuttled out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 126

You deserved it 11 314

Today, just before bed, I decided to put away the dry washing. I ended up knocking over my boyfriend's precious brewing ginger beer. It took me an hour to clean it off the floor, cupboards, door, outside and inside of the fridge. Everything is still sticky and smells of yeast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 375

Today, I realized it is my life goal to get kicked out of a fast-food restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 243

You deserved it 867

Today, I walked into a gas station and saw some $.25 gum. It looked good and I thought I had a quarter in my pocket. I found no change in my pocket once I got to the register, so I pulled out my credit card. The cashier laughed a few seconds later when my card was declined for a piece of gum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 310

You deserved it 15 532

Today, my girlfriend told me how disappointed and depressed she was that she could never make me hard. She started ranting about her looks and how she fails at everything. I didn't know how to reply. I was hard while she told me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 372

You deserved it 3 935

Today, I sneezed without knowing I had a nosebleed. Despite turning my head, a fine blood spray shot out all over my fiancée’s white dress as we were standing at the altar. She refused to say “I do” because she was so mad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 084

You deserved it 566