Love: Today, a hot girl got into the elevator just as I took a bite...

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By anonymous - 05/05/2009 14:17 - United States

Today, a hot girl got into the elevator just as I took a bite out of my Three Musketeers bar. I instinctively smiled at her and chocolate drool poured out of my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 392

You deserved it 59 719

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Same thing different taste

Mouth malfunction

By Melanie - 08/02/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I locked eyes with a cute barista and tried to flirt by giving a charming smile. I forgot I had just taken a sip of hot chocolate, so I ended up drooling a long stream of chocolate down my chin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123

You deserved it 519

Shit eating grin

By lame - 31/12/2009 05:02 - Canada

Today, I ate a chocolate bar before getting my morning coffee. While waiting for it, a good looking guy started talking to me, then suddenly lost interest. Afterwards, I saw the chocolate on my face in my car mirror. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 405

You deserved it 22 019

Hot wheels

By Liam. - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I was in an elevator, and the hot girl who lives in my building and who I have a crush on got in. She was in a wheelchair with a broken leg, I panicked and tried to flirt with her, and I said, "Nice chair." She replied, "Nice bruise" and punched me in the nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 777

You deserved it 52 447

By brenami - 31/12/2010 06:13 - United States

Today, I took my daughter to the grocery store. The bag boy seemed to be flirting with me and smiling. He had to be half my age. Once in the car I glimpsed myself in the rear view mirror. I had chocolate completely covering one of my front teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 952

You deserved it 7 757

By wilsmith - 01/02/2010 12:36 - China

Today, while in the elevator with the girl from my office that I've been crushing on, but never spoken to, I said "aren't elevators awkward?" After a long silence, she got off three floors before our office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 584

You deserved it 26 637

By soldier - 06/05/2009 02:40 - United States

Today, I was running late for work. To save time, I grabbed my belt on my way out the door and was putting it on in the elevator, which stopped at the next floor before I had put my belt all the way on. A hot girl stepped into the elevator, looked at my undone belt, screamed "Ew" and got off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 639

You deserved it 10 568

By TuralSucks - 11/03/2009 01:10 - United States

Today, I was the only one in an elevator when an attractive girl came in, talking on her phone. She told her friend, "I have to go, there's a cute guy on this elevator." Before I could even react, she turned to me and said, "Sorry for lying, I really wanted to get off the phone with her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 271 521

You deserved it 17 969

Nice try

By damn... - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a job conference. At lunch, I saw this stunning guy. At dessert time, I coughed so much that the piece of chocolate cake in my mouth went straight onto his glasses. I think it's too late to introduce myself now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 146

You deserved it 6 409

By ashhatches - 27/06/2011 19:15 - United States

Today, while at Costco, I was eating a hotdog when I saw a really hot guy walking over. Trying to be sexy, I bit my hotdog cutely and winked. I ended up choking and dropping the ketchup covered hotdog all over my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 427

You deserved it 62 571

By Raw95 - 15/03/2009 04:20 - United States

Today, I was eating at Steak N' Shake. I noticed that the cute waitress was checking me out. When I was done with my meal she wrote her number on the ticket. So, as I was walking out the door, I turned around to wave at her, and walked into a metal bar next to the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 899

You deserved it 24 603

Occam 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 22:47

You think that's bad, I did the same thing while eating a ****.

rukusrazor 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 22:56

Women love chocolate, women love little kids. You're like the best of both worlds.

Comments

omar_fml 0

Thursday 7 May 2009 5:01

haha thats pretty funny but embarrassing i feel for you... you shoulv'e made a funny situation out of it

eastiezbrazilian 0

Thursday 7 May 2009 8:42

thats what happens to desperate high school girls who just wanna get nailed

Juli_fml 0

Friday 8 May 2009 7:36

i went out on a date with a guy and this happened. it was such a huge turn off.

cguardchik_012 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 9:14

haha...fail

shilo_wallace 0

Monday 11 May 2009 6:57

I would have thought it was cute.... XD

bsbrulez92704 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 0:45

dont you just hate when that happens. better luck next time hey maybe she wanted some of that candy

fuglyasian 0

Tuesday 30 June 2009 5:18

hahahaha thats not cute. Weird. XD

Giselle468 0

Tuesday 28 July 2009 8:15

Ya know not all girls are into girls, OP. Don't try hitting on girls unless you know they're not lesbian.

somename1223132 5

Sunday 1 November 2009 19:09

Thas y u use kit kat

k43L1 0

Monday 9 November 2009 5:47

rotflol that's classic.

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The Top

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 24 493

You deserved it 4 194

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I agree, your life sucks 1 550

You deserved it 202

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I agree, your life sucks 29 931

You deserved it 3 344

Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house. One thing led to another and we were just getting to the good parts when his mom walked in. After a long, awkward pause, she said, "I like your socks" and walked out. She's a teacher at my high school. I have to see her every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 039

You deserved it 22 290

Today, I decided to hit on a very attractive girl. I guess I was too drunk to remember it was my family reunion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 899

You deserved it 47 421

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She had her whole hand in me kind of deep. It was hitting everything inside me and triggered me to poop a little bit, on her arm and the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 978

You deserved it 759