Animals: Today, after 2 years together, my boyfriend finally proposed....

By birdguts - 31/01/2011 02:34 - United Kingdom

Today, after 2 years together, my boyfriend finally proposed. I excitedly said yes. Just as we began to kiss, my half crazed cat ran in, dropped a half eaten bird at our feet, and promptly threw up on the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 994

You deserved it 5 260

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Timing is everything

By -bird-poop- - 10/10/2009 12:52 - Germany

Today, I finally plucked up the courage to propose to my girlfriend of 7 months. I took her out to the park where we had our first kiss, I got down on one knee, and before I could say, "Will you marry me?" a bird shat on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 020

You deserved it 7 568

The proposal

By Still No Ring - 15/06/2016 21:49 - United States - Lisbon

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house with his family. A kitten walked over to me with an engagement ring tied to its collar, along with a note that said "Marry Me?" I got super excited, only to find out that it was for his brother's girlfriend of 10 months, not me. We've been together 4 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 437

You deserved it 1 520

By Anonymous - 30/12/2012 06:29 - Canada - Calgary

Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 708

You deserved it 3 935

By purrfect :/ - 07/07/2016 22:34

Today, my future husband presented me with an engagement ring he had had engraved with the pet name he calls his cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 419

You deserved it 1 071

By Anonymous - 19/11/2009 13:36 - Sweden

Today, my boyfriend gave me an early wedding present. I opened the box and inside was the most adorable cat I've ever seen! It got scared, jumped out, clawed my face and pissed everywhere. My wedding is tomorrow and I look like Frankenstein's bride. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 890

You deserved it 3 858

By ollie_ollivia - 11/07/2009 23:11 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of two years proposed to me. Less than two minutes later, he decided he wasn't ready for the commitment. After I had already said yes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 670

You deserved it 2 736

Jackson Galaxy wanabee

By oh.geez - 05/02/2012 08:00 - United States

Today, my fiancé has decided to become my cat's personal trainer. This includes talking to the cat, attempting to motivate him to run up and down the stairs and telling the cat to call him "Coach Daddy". I now have a crazy fiancé and a very angry cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 167

You deserved it 4 893

YES!

By spitball101 - 12/01/2014 05:26 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years finally proposed to me at the park we first met in. As I was about to say yes, a huge fly flew straight into my mouth. I ruined the moment by choking on it and eventually spitting it out on him. I think he's rethinking the proposal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 663

You deserved it 4 937

Time doesn't always heal

By Anonymous - 03/10/2022 09:30 - Israel - Ramat Gan

Today, exactly two years to the date when I thought my dream had came true when my partner surprised me with a kitten. Except two weeks later we had to give him away because my partner was too anxious about the cat destroying any of his stuff. I'm still heartbroken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 105

You deserved it 206

By Noname - 12/03/2009 22:08 - United States

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 150 410

You deserved it 22 966

beastin34 0

Monday 31 January 2011 9:06

early wedding gift

forthepainx3 0

Monday 31 January 2011 9:00

aw, how romantic

Comments

InfiniteSecret 20

Thursday 14 September 2017 1:57

Really two years only? Each to their own but that seems like a very short time

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The Top

Today, I noticed one of my toenails was getting super long, so I cut it. In doing so, I accidentally ripped it off and it started bleeding. As I went to get something to stop it from bleeding, I got a huge splinter in my little toe, causing a painful infection. I think I should just go back to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 323

You deserved it 169

Today, I asked my boyfriend to spend the night at my house because my dad would be working out of town, and once the rest of the house left I thought it'd be sweet if he snuck in my room and slept with me. His reply was, "Why bother? You're on your period, it's not like we can do anything." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 259

You deserved it 14 167

The Top

Today, my friend decided that we should go clubbing together to "catch up". Her version of catching up is me standing beside her making out with some random dude in the parking lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 647

You deserved it 1 290

Today, my girlfriend and I attempted some bondage for the first time. Within seconds of the handcuffs being put on, I went into a serious panic attack. I was playing the dominant; my girlfriend was the one in cuffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 087

You deserved it 15 611

Today, my date from last night sent a text obviously meant for his brother or a friend, which said, and I quote, “Bro I tried all those psychological tricks you taught me to get her to want to suck my dick but she didn’t offer even once, now I got blue balls and I had to pay for her meal too.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 833

You deserved it 343

Today, a senile old lady came up to me and offered me chocolate. I noticed that it was ex-lax, so I politely told her no. My 4-year-old daughter pushed me aside and ate the ex-lax, because she thought it was candy. I now have a stinky child on a 3 hour bus ride, with no stops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 061

You deserved it 11 177

Today, my wife got mad at me for buying Raisin Bran without almonds. I offered to add confectionery sliced almonds, which we already had at home. Her response, “That’s not the same thing.” It is exactly the same thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 837

You deserved it 206

Today, I bought my niece a plush My Little Pony figure for her birthday. Only after she unwrapped it did I realize that it was meant to be a sex toy for grown men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 789

You deserved it 19 245