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hey... at least you found it, OP ;)
I Wana know how this happened
Since you apparently had access to a second phone, why didn't you just call YOUR phone? That's what I have to do approximately three times a day when my husband can't find his.
Many years ago I put my eyeglasses in the bottom drawer of my dresser. It took me two days to find them, and dozens of years later, I still have NO clue why I did that. I *always* left them on the top of my desk. Very very weird. Glad you found them! :D
"Calling every place I had visited in the past 24 hours." If OP was able to do that without access to a second phone, that would be a whole different FML lol.
That's an early warning sign of Alzheimer's
Actually, no it isn't. It could, however, be a sign of someone who is trying to do too many things at once (multi tasking doesn't work past 2-3 tasks, we've been brainwashed). If, however, once she found the phone, she had no idea of what a phone is for, then something indeed could be wrong.
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I can't be the only one wondering what the backstory of this FML is
how tf did your phone end up in there?